What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad?

What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad?

When it comes to moving to another place instead of living in your country, it will have the pros and cons and the outlined below will illustrate that.

First of all, the advantages of living or studying abroad is to have a great exposure to a different culture. You will have chances to meet the local people of that country, try lots of local cuisine and specialties. For instance, for when you're moving to Vietnam, the first traditional food you must try is pho in the dis. In addition, being independent in many aspects of your life is one of the author's advantages. Means that you have to do everything for living by your own self. For example, you must learn how to communicate, how to cook, how to effectively work,…

Being stressful due to be compulsory to manage everything by your own self, indicating it's out of your ability. For instance, striking a balance in your study, your work, and also your own development may be stressful if you don't know how to do it effectively. Furthermore, having a culture shock if you don't know how to have a quick fix, how to communicate, how to make new relationships with new people. Being over overwhelming with all the sectors would be immensely possible. There are two disadvantages of living abroad without a right and serious understanding.

To sum, having a chance to live in a different country would be an opportunity if you know how to manage everything by yourself and oppositely. So you have to be careful with making any decision.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "When it comes to moving to another place instead of living in your country" -> "When considering relocation to another country instead of residing in one’s native country"
    Explanation: The revised phrase "considering relocation to another country" is more formal and precise than "moving to another place," which is vague and informal. "Residing in one’s native country" is a more formal way to express "living in your country."

  2. "the outlined below will illustrate that" -> "the following will illustrate the points"
    Explanation: "The outlined below" is unclear and informal. "The following" is more direct and appropriate for academic writing, and specifying "the points" clarifies what is being illustrated.

  3. "the advantages of living or studying abroad is to have a great exposure to a different culture" -> "the advantages of living or studying abroad include exposure to diverse cultures"
    Explanation: "Is to have a great exposure" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "Include exposure to diverse cultures" is grammatically correct and more formal.

  4. "You will have chances to meet the local people of that country, try lots of local cuisine and specialties" -> "You will have opportunities to meet the local population, sample various local cuisine, and experience local specialties"
    Explanation: "Chances" is informal and vague; "opportunities" is more precise and formal. "Sample" is more appropriate than "try" for food, and "experience" is more formal than "try" for specialties.

  5. "the first traditional food you must try is pho in the dis" -> "the first traditional dish you must try is pho in Vietnam"
    Explanation: "In the dis" is unclear and incorrect. "In Vietnam" is specific and correct, providing the necessary geographical context.

  6. "being independent in many aspects of your life is one of the author’s advantages" -> "independence in various aspects of life is an advantage"
    Explanation: "The author’s advantages" is unclear and awkward. "An advantage" is more straightforward and formal.

  7. "Means that you have to do everything for living by your own self" -> "This means you must manage all aspects of your life independently"
    Explanation: "Means that you have to do everything for living by your own self" is awkward and informal. "Manage all aspects of your life independently" is clearer and more formal.

  8. "Being stressful due to be compulsory to manage everything by your own self" -> "Being stressful due to the necessity of managing everything independently"
    Explanation: "Being stressful due to be compulsory" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "The necessity of managing everything independently" is grammatically correct and more formal.

  9. "indicating it’s out of your ability" -> "indicating it exceeds your capabilities"
    Explanation: "It’s out of your ability" is informal and colloquial. "It exceeds your capabilities" is more formal and precise.

  10. "having a culture shock if you don’t know how to have a quick fix" -> "experiencing culture shock if you lack effective coping strategies"
    Explanation: "Having a quick fix" is informal and unclear. "Lack effective coping strategies" is more precise and appropriate for academic writing.

  11. "Being over overwhelming with all the sectors would be immensely possible" -> "Feeling overwhelmed by all aspects of life is highly likely"
    Explanation: "Being over overwhelming with all the sectors" is grammatically incorrect and unclear. "Feeling overwhelmed by all aspects of life" is grammatically correct and clearer.

  12. "There are two disadvantages of living abroad without a right and serious understanding" -> "Two disadvantages of living abroad without proper understanding and preparation"
    Explanation: "A right and serious understanding" is unclear and grammatically incorrect. "Proper understanding and preparation" is grammatically correct and more formal.

  13. "having a chance to live in a different country would be an opportunity if you know how to manage everything by yourself and oppositely" -> "having the opportunity to live in a different country is advantageous if you can effectively manage your life"
    Explanation: "Would be an opportunity if you know how to manage everything by yourself and oppositely" is awkward and unclear. "Is advantageous if you can effectively manage your life" is clearer and more formal.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay attempts to address both the advantages and disadvantages of living or studying abroad. However, it lacks a clear and structured approach to fully explore each aspect. For example, while the advantages are mentioned (cultural exposure and independence), the disadvantages are not clearly delineated or developed. The mention of stress and culture shock as disadvantages is vague and lacks depth. The phrase "two disadvantages" suggests that there should be more elaboration, but only one is briefly discussed.
    • How to improve: To better address all parts of the question, the essay should clearly separate the advantages and disadvantages into distinct paragraphs. Each point should be elaborated upon with specific examples and explanations. For instance, when discussing cultural exposure, the writer could elaborate on how this exposure can enhance personal growth or career opportunities.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay does not maintain a clear position throughout. The introduction suggests a balanced view of pros and cons, but the conclusion is ambiguous and does not reinforce a definitive stance. Phrases like "having a chance to live in a different country would be an opportunity if you know how to manage everything by yourself" are unclear and do not convey a strong position.
    • How to improve: To present a clearer position, the writer should explicitly state their viewpoint in the introduction and consistently refer back to it in the body and conclusion. A strong thesis statement that outlines the main arguments for both sides would help guide the reader and maintain focus.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The ideas presented in the essay are underdeveloped and lack sufficient support. For example, while the essay mentions cultural exposure, it does not explain how this exposure can lead to personal or professional benefits. The discussion of independence is also superficial, lacking specific examples of how this independence manifests in daily life.
    • How to improve: To enhance the presentation and support of ideas, the writer should aim to provide more detailed explanations and examples for each point made. For instance, when discussing independence, the writer could describe specific challenges faced and how overcoming them contributes to personal growth. Using statistics or studies related to studying abroad could also strengthen the arguments.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay occasionally deviates from the main topic. For instance, the mention of "striking a balance in your study, your work, and also your own development" introduces a new idea that is not clearly tied back to the main advantages or disadvantages of living abroad. Additionally, phrases like "being over overwhelming" are unclear and detract from the focus on the topic.
    • How to improve: To stay on topic, the writer should ensure that each sentence contributes directly to the discussion of advantages and disadvantages. It may be helpful to outline the main points before writing to ensure that all content is relevant and focused. Avoiding vague phrases and ensuring clarity will also help maintain topic relevance.

Overall, to improve the essay and potentially raise the band score, the writer should focus on structuring the response more clearly, developing ideas with specific examples, maintaining a consistent position, and ensuring that all content is relevant to the prompt.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 6

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. However, the organization lacks clarity and logical progression. For instance, the transition from discussing advantages to disadvantages is abrupt and does not follow a clear thematic or chronological order. The introduction mentions "pros and cons," but the subsequent paragraphs do not clearly delineate these points, leading to confusion about which ideas belong to which category.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, the writer should clearly separate the advantages and disadvantages into distinct paragraphs. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea, followed by supporting details. Additionally, using transitional phrases such as "On the one hand" for advantages and "On the other hand" for disadvantages can help guide the reader through the argument.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay attempts to use paragraphs, but they are not effectively structured. The first paragraph mixes ideas about advantages without clearly separating them, while the second paragraph discusses disadvantages but lacks a coherent flow. For example, the mention of "being stressful" and "culture shock" in the same paragraph without clear connections makes it hard for the reader to follow the argument.
    • How to improve: Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea. For instance, one paragraph could discuss the cultural exposure gained from studying abroad, while another could address the independence gained. The writer should also ensure that each paragraph has a clear beginning, middle, and end, with a concluding sentence that summarizes the main point or links to the next idea.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay uses some cohesive devices, such as "for instance" and "in addition," but they are repetitive and not varied enough to create a smooth flow. The use of phrases like "being stressful" and "being over overwhelming" lacks clarity and can confuse the reader regarding the intended meaning. Additionally, the essay does not effectively use conjunctions or linking words to connect ideas within and between sentences.
    • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, the writer should incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases, such as "Furthermore," "Moreover," "However," and "Consequently." This will help in creating clearer connections between ideas. Additionally, varying sentence structures and using pronouns to refer back to previously mentioned ideas can improve cohesion. For example, instead of repeating "living abroad," the writer could use "this experience" or "such a move" to maintain flow and avoid redundancy.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates an understanding of the topic, improvements in logical organization, paragraph structure, and the use of cohesive devices are necessary to achieve a higher band score in Coherence and Cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, particularly in discussing the advantages and disadvantages of living abroad. Phrases like "great exposure to a different culture" and "local cuisine and specialties" indicate an attempt to use varied vocabulary. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of repetition, such as the frequent use of "how to" in several contexts, which detracts from the overall lexical variety.
    • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and more descriptive phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using "how to," they could use alternatives like "methods for" or "strategies to." Additionally, expanding the vocabulary related to cultural experiences and personal development could add depth to the essay.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains some imprecise vocabulary choices that can lead to confusion. For instance, the phrase "being stressful due to be compulsory to manage everything by your own self" is awkward and unclear. The use of "being over overwhelming" is also incorrect; the intended meaning could be better expressed with "being overwhelmed." These inaccuracies can hinder the clarity of the argument.
    • How to improve: The writer should focus on using vocabulary that accurately conveys their intended meaning. For example, instead of "being stressful," they could say "experiencing stress." Practicing paraphrasing and using context-appropriate terms will help improve precision. Additionally, reviewing common collocations and idiomatic expressions can enhance clarity.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "dis" instead of "dish," and "over overwhelming" instead of "overwhelming." These mistakes indicate a need for greater attention to spelling, as they can distract the reader and undermine the writer’s credibility.
    • How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should engage in regular proofreading and utilize spell-check tools. Additionally, practicing spelling through writing exercises and flashcards can reinforce correct spelling patterns. Reading more extensively can also help familiarize the writer with the correct spelling of commonly used words.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a foundational understanding of vocabulary related to the topic, there are significant areas for improvement in range, precision, and spelling. By expanding their vocabulary, focusing on precise language use, and enhancing spelling accuracy, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criteria.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, such as simple sentences ("You will have chances to meet the local people of that country") and compound sentences ("Being independent in many aspects of your life is one of the author’s advantages"). However, the overall range is limited, with many sentences following a similar structure. For example, the repeated use of "how to" in phrases like "how to communicate," "how to cook," and "how to effectively work" indicates a lack of variety in sentence construction. Additionally, some sentences are awkwardly phrased, such as "Being stressful due to be compulsory to manage everything by your own self," which detracts from clarity.
    • How to improve: To enhance the range of sentence structures, the writer should incorporate more complex sentences, such as those using subordinate clauses or varied conjunctions. For instance, instead of repeatedly starting with "how to," the writer could use phrases like "In order to communicate effectively, one must…" or "While managing everything alone can be stressful, it also fosters independence." Practicing sentence variety through writing exercises focused on combining and restructuring sentences can also be beneficial.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that hinder clarity. For example, the phrase "the outlined below will illustrate that" is awkward and should be rephrased for clarity. The use of "is to have a great exposure" should be corrected to "is having great exposure." Additionally, there are punctuation errors, such as the misuse of commas and the ellipsis ("…") at the end of a sentence, which is not appropriate in formal writing. The phrase "being over overwhelming" is incorrect and should be simplified to "being overwhelmed."
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and proper sentence structure. Regular practice with grammar exercises, particularly those targeting common errors, can help. Furthermore, proofreading the essay for punctuation errors and awkward phrasing before submission is crucial. Reading academic essays can also provide insights into proper grammar and punctuation usage in context.

Bài sửa mẫu

When considering relocation to another country instead of residing in one’s native country, there are both advantages and disadvantages, and the following will illustrate these points.

First of all, the advantages of living or studying abroad include exposure to diverse cultures. You will have opportunities to meet the local population, sample various local cuisines, and experience unique specialties. For instance, when moving to Vietnam, the first traditional dish you must try is pho. In addition, independence in various aspects of life is a significant benefit. This means you must manage all aspects of your life independently. For example, you will need to learn how to communicate, how to cook, and how to effectively work.

However, this independence can also be stressful due to the necessity of managing everything on your own, indicating that it may exceed your capabilities. Striking a balance between your studies, work, and personal development can be overwhelming if you do not know how to do it effectively. Furthermore, experiencing culture shock is likely if you lack effective coping strategies, making it difficult to communicate and build new relationships. Feeling overwhelmed by all aspects of life is highly probable in such situations. There are two disadvantages of living abroad without proper understanding and preparation.

To sum up, having the opportunity to live in a different country is advantageous if you can effectively manage your life; otherwise, it can be quite challenging. Therefore, it is essential to be careful when making such a decision.

Bài viết liên quan

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more…

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