People living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than the previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

It is absolutely can say yes about the topic that people living in the 21st century have a better quality oy life than the previous centuries Therefore there are many reasons to answer that topic And I am in complete agreement with this view.
The first reason for this enhanced quality of life is the progress in healthcare Nowadays, modern medical innovation shave have not increased life expectancy but also improved the quality a life For example ,much medical is researched successfully and gradually produced to help people stronger Additionally, many gadgets more modern thon in the previous centuries have been borned in the 21st century also make easily to find sickness early.
Secondly, people who lived in the previous centuries couldn't have enough money to go to school especially children Nowadays by the development of economics almost every family always make a good condition for their child can go to school because they take notice ay the education. For example ,many parents can work all day to earn money to pay for thar school's fee. Moreover, nowadays the government advices people to arrive children to school so that they can be educated to get the achievement in the future to served for their country
In conclusion, it is clearly to say that people living in the 21st centuries have a better quality ay life than people who lived in the previous centuries. Beside that, nowadays, we also have more opportunities to get more opportunities in the past Additionally, we can easily connect, navigate the Internet to find any information necessary for live However ,people lived in the past ese not lucky like that.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"It is absolutely can say yes about the topic" -> "It is unequivocally true that"
Explanation: "It is absolutely can say yes" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "It is unequivocally true that" corrects the grammar and enhances the formality of the statement.
"quality oy life" -> "quality of life"
Explanation: "oy" is a typographical error. Correcting it to "of" ensures proper spelling and maintains the formal tone of the text.
"Therefore there are many reasons to answer that topic" -> "Therefore, there are numerous reasons to support this view"
Explanation: "to answer that topic" is unclear and incorrect. "to support this view" is more precise and appropriate for academic writing, indicating the justification of the opinion.
"I am in complete agreement with this view" -> "I fully concur with this perspective"
Explanation: "I am in complete agreement" is a bit informal and verbose. "I fully concur" is more concise and maintains an academic tone.
"progress in healthcare Nowadays, modern medical innovation shave have not increased life expectancy but also improved the quality a life" -> "advances in healthcare have not only increased life expectancy but also enhanced the quality of life"
Explanation: "progress in healthcare Nowadays" is informal and lacks a verb. "advances in healthcare have" corrects this and improves the sentence structure. "shave have" is a grammatical error; "have" should be used consistently. "quality a life" is a typographical error; "quality of life" is the correct phrase.
"much medical is researched successfully and gradually produced to help people stronger" -> "much medical research has been successfully conducted and gradually implemented to strengthen people"
Explanation: "much medical is researched" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "much medical research has been successfully conducted and gradually implemented" corrects these issues and enhances clarity and formality.
"many gadgets more modern thon in the previous centuries have been borned" -> "many more advanced gadgets than those in previous centuries have been developed"
Explanation: "many gadgets more modern thon in the previous centuries have been borned" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "many more advanced gadgets than those in previous centuries have been developed" corrects these issues and uses more precise language.
"make easily to find sickness early" -> "facilitate early detection of illnesses"
Explanation: "make easily to find sickness early" is grammatically incorrect and informal. "facilitate early detection of illnesses" is grammatically correct and maintains a formal tone.
"people who lived in the previous centuries couldn’t have enough money to go to school especially children" -> "individuals in previous centuries often lacked sufficient funds to attend school, particularly children"
Explanation: "people who lived in the previous centuries couldn’t have enough money" is informal and awkward. "individuals in previous centuries often lacked sufficient funds to attend school, particularly children" is more formal and precise.
"Nowadays by the development of economics" -> "Currently, due to economic development"
Explanation: "Nowadays by the development of economics" is awkward and grammatically incorrect. "Currently, due to economic development" corrects these issues and enhances clarity.
"make a good condition for their child can go to school" -> "ensure their children can attend school"
Explanation: "make a good condition for their child can go to school" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "ensure their children can attend school" corrects these issues and is more direct and formal.
"the government advices people to arrive children to school" -> "the government advises parents to send their children to school"
Explanation: "the government advices people to arrive children to school" is grammatically incorrect and unclear. "the government advises parents to send their children to school" corrects these issues and clarifies the intended meaning.
"Beside that, nowadays, we also have more opportunities to get more opportunities in the past" -> "Furthermore, we now have more opportunities than in the past"
Explanation: "Beside that, nowadays, we also have more opportunities to get more opportunities in the past" is redundant and awkward. "Furthermore, we now have more opportunities than in the past" simplifies and clarifies the statement.
"However,people lived in the past ese not lucky like that" -> "However, individuals in the past were not as fortunate"
Explanation: "However,people lived in the past ese not lucky like that" is grammatically incorrect and informal. "However, individuals in the past were not as fortunate" corrects these issues and maintains a formal tone.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Task Response: 6

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by asserting that people in the 21st century have a better quality of life compared to previous centuries. However, while the writer agrees with the statement, the response lacks depth in exploring the extent of this agreement. For instance, the essay mentions healthcare and education as improvements but does not sufficiently elaborate on how these factors contribute to a better quality of life. The examples provided are somewhat vague and do not convincingly illustrate the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should explicitly state the extent of their agreement (e.g., fully agree, partially agree) and provide a more balanced view by discussing potential counterarguments or limitations of modern life. Including specific statistics or studies related to healthcare advancements and educational access would strengthen the argument.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay attempts to maintain a clear position by stating agreement with the prompt. However, the clarity of this position is undermined by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, which can confuse the reader. For example, phrases like "it is absolutely can say yes about the topic" are unclear and detract from the overall message.
- How to improve: The writer should focus on using clear and concise language to express their position. A strong thesis statement at the end of the introduction could help solidify the stance. Additionally, ensuring that each paragraph clearly ties back to the main argument will help maintain a consistent position throughout the essay.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents some ideas, such as advancements in healthcare and education, but they are not well-developed. The supporting examples are either too general or poorly articulated, such as "many gadgets more modern thon in the previous centuries have been borned," which lacks clarity and coherence. The ideas are introduced but not sufficiently extended or supported with detailed explanations or relevant examples.
- How to improve: To improve this aspect, the writer should aim to elaborate on each point made. For instance, when discussing healthcare, they could mention specific medical technologies or treatments that have improved life quality. Providing personal anecdotes or well-known examples would also enhance the support for the ideas presented.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the quality of life in the 21st century. However, there are moments where the relevance of certain statements is questionable, such as the mention of government advice regarding children’s education, which could be more directly linked to the overall argument about quality of life.
- How to improve: The writer should ensure that every point made directly supports the thesis. To maintain focus, it may be helpful to outline the main points before writing and to refer back to the prompt regularly during the drafting process. This will help ensure that all content remains relevant to the question asked.

In summary, to improve the overall score for Task Response, the writer should aim for clearer articulation of their position, more developed and supported ideas, and a more comprehensive exploration of the prompt.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 5

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay attempts to present a logical argument in favor of the statement that people in the 21st century have a better quality of life. However, the organization is somewhat disjointed. For instance, the transition between the first and second reasons is abrupt, lacking a clear linking sentence that connects the ideas. The introduction states agreement but does not outline the main points that will be discussed, which can confuse the reader about the structure of the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, the writer should clearly outline the main points in the introduction. Each paragraph should begin with a topic sentence that summarizes the main idea, followed by supporting details. Additionally, using transitional phrases such as "Furthermore," "In addition," or "Conversely" can help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay includes paragraphs, but they are not effectively structured. The first paragraph combines multiple ideas without clear separation, making it difficult to follow. The second paragraph introduces new ideas but lacks a cohesive structure. The conclusion is also weak, as it does not effectively summarize the key points made in the essay.
- How to improve: Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea. For example, the first paragraph could strictly discuss healthcare advancements, while the second could focus on educational opportunities. The conclusion should succinctly restate the main arguments and reinforce the writer’s position without introducing new information.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates limited use of cohesive devices, which affects the overall coherence. Phrases like "for example" are used, but there is little variation in the types of cohesive devices employed. Additionally, some sentences are poorly constructed, leading to confusion (e.g., "many gadgets more modern thon in the previous centuries have been borned").
- How to improve: To improve cohesion, the writer should incorporate a wider range of cohesive devices, such as conjunctions (e.g., "although," "however"), referencing (e.g., "this," "these"), and substitution (e.g., "such as"). Practicing sentence variety and ensuring that each sentence logically connects to the previous one will enhance the overall flow of the essay.

Overall, while the essay presents a clear opinion, improvements in organization, paragraph structure, and the use of cohesive devices are necessary to achieve a higher band score in Coherence and Cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable attempt to use a variety of vocabulary related to the topic, such as "healthcare," "medical innovation," and "quality of life." However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of repetition, particularly with phrases like "better quality of life" and "previous centuries." The use of phrases like "gadgets more modern" and "development of economics" lacks sophistication and could be expressed with more varied vocabulary.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and more complex phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using "better quality of life," alternatives like "enhanced living standards" or "improved life conditions" could be employed. Additionally, exploring terms related to technology and education, such as "technological advancements" or "educational opportunities," would enrich the essay.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: There are several instances of imprecise vocabulary usage that detract from the clarity of the essay. For example, the phrase "oy life" appears to be a typographical error, and "gadgets more modern thon" contains a misspelling ("thon" instead of "than"). The phrase "make easily to find sickness early" is awkward and unclear, which impacts the reader’s understanding.
- How to improve: The writer should focus on using vocabulary that accurately conveys their intended meaning. For instance, instead of saying "make easily to find sickness early," a more precise expression could be "facilitate early detection of illnesses." Regular practice with vocabulary exercises and using a thesaurus can help in selecting more fitting words.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains multiple spelling errors, such as "oy" instead of "of," "thar" instead of "their," and "advices" instead of "advises." These errors can confuse the reader and detract from the overall professionalism of the writing.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread their work carefully or use spell-check tools before submission. Additionally, maintaining a personal list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them can be beneficial. Engaging in regular writing exercises that focus on spelling can also help reinforce correct spelling habits.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a foundational understanding of the topic and attempts to use a variety of vocabulary, there are significant areas for improvement in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By focusing on these aspects, the writer can enhance their lexical resource and potentially achieve a higher band score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures. Most sentences are simple or compound, lacking the complexity that can enhance clarity and sophistication. For example, the sentence "The first reason for this enhanced quality of life is the progress in healthcare" is straightforward but could be expanded with subordinate clauses to add depth. Additionally, phrases like "people living in the 21st century have a better quality of life" are repeated without variation, which detracts from the overall engagement of the writing.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer should practice incorporating complex sentences that include dependent clauses. For instance, instead of saying "people living in the 21st century have a better quality of life," the writer could say, "While people in the 21st century enjoy a better quality of life due to advancements in technology and healthcare, those in previous centuries faced significant hardships." This not only varies the structure but also enhances the argument’s depth.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that hinder clarity. For example, "It is absolutely can say yes about the topic" is grammatically incorrect; it should be rephrased to "I absolutely agree that people living in the 21st century have a better quality of life." Furthermore, punctuation errors, such as missing commas after introductory phrases (e.g., "Nowadays,"), and incorrect word forms (e.g., "oy" instead of "of," "thons" instead of "than") contribute to a lack of coherence.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, the writer should review the rules of subject-verb agreement and practice using correct verb forms. Regularly proofreading for common errors, such as incorrect word usage and punctuation placement, can also help. Additionally, engaging with grammar exercises focused on common IELTS writing pitfalls could provide targeted practice. For example, ensuring that each sentence is complete and correctly punctuated will improve the overall readability of the essay.

In summary, to achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on expanding their range of sentence structures and improving grammatical accuracy through practice and careful revision.

Bài sửa mẫu

It is unequivocally true that people living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than those in previous centuries. Therefore, there are numerous reasons to support this view, and I fully concur with this perspective.

The first reason for this enhanced quality of life is the progress in healthcare. Nowadays, modern medical innovations have not only increased life expectancy but also improved the quality of life. For example, much medical research has been successfully conducted and gradually implemented to strengthen people. Additionally, many more advanced gadgets than those in previous centuries have been developed in the 21st century, which facilitate the early detection of illnesses.

Secondly, individuals in previous centuries often lacked sufficient funds to attend school, particularly children. Currently, due to economic development, almost every family can ensure their children can attend school because they recognize the importance of education. For example, many parents can work all day to earn money to pay for their children’s school fees. Moreover, the government advises parents to send their children to school so that they can be educated and achieve success in the future to serve their country.

In conclusion, it is clear that people living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than those who lived in previous centuries. Furthermore, we now have more opportunities than in the past. Additionally, we can easily connect and navigate the Internet to find any information necessary for life. However, individuals in the past were not as fortunate.