Some people feel that global warming should be dealt with by governments. Others feel it is the responsibility of individuals in society to solve the problem. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years the issue of global warming has gained prominence among environmental issues. It is argued by certain individuals that the government should take responsibility for addressing the perceived threat, but others suggest that it is best left to individual citizens. In this essay, I will consider both ideas and explain why I agree with the latter group. There are a variety of reasons why many individuals turn to the government when it comes to dealing with problematic situations. Some feel the state is the only party with sufficient resources to adequately address large problems. Others believe politicians have a deeper knowledge of national and global challenges and a better understanding of how to deal with them. There are more than a few people who have a sense of entitlement and simply believe that more governance is the answer to all of our problems including Earth's rising temperature. On the other hand, a number of people argue the better solution is for each of us to contribute in our own way to resolve this issue. This group often points to the inherent inefficiency and even wastefulness of government. They state that individuals are virtually always more likely to make sound decisions as to how best to solve dilemmas related to their personal welfare than bureaucrats with a vested interest in certain outcomes. They further note that individuals inevitably make better decisions allocating their own resources than politicians do when spending money that is not their own, on other people.
It's my opinion that the second argument makes substantially more sense than the first. A quick look at American history, for example, demonstrates the utter failure of even one of the most powerful and economically advantaged governments in the world, in cases such as the so-called Wars on Poverty, Drugs and Terror. Private citizens, meanwhile, have shown repeatedly that when given the freedom to act as they see fit, they will very frequently do so in an efficient, responsible and productive manner.
In conclusion, while some state we must depend on the government to lead the way in the fight against the warming of the Earth, I believe this view is misguided. Based on the fact that individuals have a better track record than governments of not only solving problems, but doing so more sensibly, I think it's clear they should be left to address this issue as they see fit.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"In recent years the issue of global warming has gained prominence among environmental issues." -> "In recent years, the issue of global warming has gained prominence as an environmental concern."
Explanation: Adding "as an environmental concern" clarifies the context and enhances the formal tone by specifying the type of issue being discussed.
"It is argued by certain individuals" -> "Some argue"
Explanation: Simplifying "It is argued by certain individuals" to "Some argue" maintains the formal tone while reducing redundancy and improving readability.
"the government should take responsibility for addressing the perceived threat" -> "the government should assume responsibility for addressing the perceived threat"
Explanation: "Assume responsibility" is a more precise and formal expression than "take responsibility," which is slightly colloquial.
"best left to individual citizens" -> "best handled by individual citizens"
Explanation: "Handled" is more specific and appropriate in this context than "left to," which can imply abandonment rather than active involvement.
"There are a variety of reasons why many individuals turn to the government" -> "Several reasons contribute to individuals seeking government intervention"
Explanation: "Several reasons contribute to individuals seeking government intervention" is more concise and formal, improving the academic tone.
"the state is the only party with sufficient resources" -> "the government possesses the necessary resources"
Explanation: "Possesses the necessary resources" is more precise and formal than "is the only party with sufficient resources," which is vague and informal.
"politicians have a deeper knowledge of national and global challenges" -> "politicians possess a deeper understanding of national and global challenges"
Explanation: "Possess a deeper understanding" is more formal and academically appropriate than "have a deeper knowledge."
"a number of people argue the better solution" -> "many argue that the better solution"
Explanation: "Many argue that" is more direct and formal than "a number of people argue the," which is awkwardly phrased.
"individuals are virtually always more likely to make sound decisions" -> "individuals are generally more likely to make informed decisions"
Explanation: "Generally more likely to make informed decisions" is more precise and formal than "virtually always more likely to make sound decisions," which uses colloquial language.
"bureaucrats with a vested interest in certain outcomes" -> "bureaucrats with vested interests in specific outcomes"
Explanation: "With vested interests in specific outcomes" is more formal and precise than "with a vested interest in certain outcomes."
"when spending money that is not their own, on other people" -> "when allocating funds not their own to others"
Explanation: "Allocating funds not their own to others" is more formal and concise than "when spending money that is not their own, on other people."
"It’s my opinion" -> "In my opinion"
Explanation: "In my opinion" is a more formal expression than "It’s my opinion," which is colloquial.
"the utter failure of even one of the most powerful and economically advantaged governments" -> "the significant failures of even the most powerful and economically advanced governments"
Explanation: "Significant failures" and "economically advanced" are more precise and formal than "utter failure" and "economically advantaged."
"Private citizens, meanwhile, have shown repeatedly that when given the freedom to act as they see fit" -> "Private citizens have consistently demonstrated that when given the freedom to act as they see fit"
Explanation: "Have consistently demonstrated" is more formal and academically appropriate than "have shown repeatedly."
"they will very frequently do so in an efficient, responsible and productive manner" -> "they often act efficiently, responsibly, and productively"
Explanation: "Act efficiently, responsibly, and productively" is more concise and formal than "do so in an efficient, responsible and productive manner."

These changes enhance the formal tone, improve precision, and align the language with academic standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both views regarding the responsibility for tackling global warming. The first view is presented clearly, noting that some believe the government should take charge due to its resources and expertise. The second view, which the author supports, is also articulated well, emphasizing individual responsibility and the inefficiency of government action. However, while both perspectives are discussed, the essay could benefit from a more balanced exploration of the arguments for government intervention, as it leans more heavily towards the individual perspective.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the essay could include more specific examples or data supporting the governmental perspective. This would provide a more comprehensive discussion of both sides, demonstrating a deeper understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The author maintains a clear position throughout the essay, consistently supporting the idea that individuals should take responsibility for addressing global warming. Phrases like "I believe this view is misguided" reinforce the author’s stance. However, the transition from discussing both views to presenting a personal opinion could be smoother to enhance clarity.
- How to improve: To strengthen the clarity of the position, the author could use transitional phrases that explicitly indicate when they are shifting from discussing the general views to stating their own opinion. This would help the reader follow the argument more easily.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports the author’s ideas effectively, particularly in the argument for individual responsibility. The use of historical examples, such as the "Wars on Poverty, Drugs and Terror," adds weight to the argument. However, the support for the governmental perspective is less developed, which could lead to a perception of bias.
- How to improve: To improve the development of ideas, the author should include specific examples or counterarguments that highlight the potential effectiveness of government action. This would not only provide a more balanced view but also demonstrate critical thinking by engaging with opposing arguments.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic of global warming and the responsibilities of governments versus individuals. The arguments presented are relevant and contribute to the overall discussion. However, some sections could be seen as slightly tangential, particularly when discussing the inefficiencies of government without tying it back to the specific context of global warming.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the author should ensure that every point made directly relates back to the central question of responsibility for global warming. This could involve explicitly linking the discussion of government inefficiencies to specific failures in environmental policy or initiatives.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the task and presents a well-structured argument. By addressing the suggestions for improvement, the author could enhance the depth and balance of their discussion, potentially achieving an even higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a clear and logical organization of ideas. The introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion by presenting both viewpoints and stating the author’s opinion. The body paragraphs are structured to first present the arguments for government responsibility, followed by the counterarguments advocating for individual responsibility. This clear delineation helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. For instance, the transition from discussing government inefficiencies to the advantages of individual action is smooth and logical.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using more explicit topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to clearly outline the main idea being discussed. This can help reinforce the structure and guide the reader through the argumentation more effectively. Additionally, integrating more transitional phrases between ideas could further clarify the relationships between points.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, which contributes to its overall coherence. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument, with the first paragraph discussing government responsibility, the second addressing individual responsibility, and the final paragraph providing the author’s opinion. This separation allows for a clear understanding of the distinct viewpoints.
- How to improve: While the paragraphing is generally effective, consider ensuring that each paragraph contains a balanced amount of information. For instance, the paragraph discussing government responsibility could be expanded with more examples or evidence to match the depth of the individual responsibility paragraph. This balance can enhance the overall coherence of the essay by ensuring that each viewpoint is given equal consideration.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, such as "On the other hand," "for example," and "meanwhile," which help to connect ideas and maintain the flow of the argument. These devices effectively guide the reader through the contrasting perspectives and the author’s opinion. The use of cohesive devices contributes to the clarity and readability of the essay.
- How to improve: To further diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating more advanced linking phrases and conjunctions. For example, using phrases like "In contrast," "Conversely," or "Furthermore" can add variety and sophistication to the writing. Additionally, ensure that cohesive devices are used appropriately to avoid redundancy; for instance, varying the use of "individuals" and "citizens" can prevent repetition and enhance the essay’s overall cohesion.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of coherence and cohesion, with clear organization, effective paragraphing, and a good range of cohesive devices. By implementing the suggested improvements, the essay can achieve an even higher level of clarity and sophistication.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 8

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of vocabulary, effectively incorporating terms related to the topic of global warming and governance. Phrases such as "perceived threat," "sense of entitlement," and "inherent inefficiency" showcase the writer’s ability to use varied vocabulary to express complex ideas. Additionally, the use of terms like "bureaucrats" and "allocated resources" indicates a strong grasp of relevant terminology.
- How to improve: To enhance this aspect further, the writer could include more synonyms and varied expressions to avoid repetition. For instance, instead of repeating "government" and "individuals," alternatives like "authorities," "state," "citizens," or "private sector" could be employed. This would not only enrich the vocabulary but also demonstrate a broader lexical range.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, with phrases like "the better solution" and "sound decisions" effectively conveying the intended meaning. However, there are instances where the vocabulary could be more precise. For example, the phrase "the utter failure of even one of the most powerful and economically advantaged governments" could be seen as somewhat vague; the term "utter failure" lacks specificity regarding what failures are being referenced.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should aim to clarify and specify their points. Instead of using broad terms like "utter failure," they could provide specific examples or outcomes that illustrate the failures of government interventions. This not only enhances clarity but also strengthens the argument.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors in the text. Words such as "government," "individuals," and "inefficiency" are spelled correctly, reflecting a strong command of English spelling conventions.
- How to improve: While the spelling is accurate, the writer can maintain this level of proficiency by continuing to proofread their work. Utilizing tools like spell checkers or engaging in regular writing practice can further reinforce spelling skills. Additionally, expanding vocabulary through reading can help familiarize the writer with less common words and their correct spellings.

Overall, the essay effectively meets the criteria for Lexical Resource at a Band 8 level, with strengths in vocabulary range and spelling accuracy. By focusing on enhancing precision and further diversifying vocabulary, the writer can aim for an even higher score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a strong command of various sentence structures. For example, the writer effectively uses complex sentences, such as “It is argued by certain individuals that the government should take responsibility for addressing the perceived threat,” which showcases the ability to convey nuanced ideas. Additionally, the use of contrasting structures is evident in phrases like “On the other hand” and “while some state we must depend on the government,” which help to clearly delineate opposing viewpoints. However, there are instances of repetitive structures, particularly in the use of “believe” and “argue,” which could be varied further to enhance the essay’s overall sophistication.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more varied introductory phrases, such as “Some experts contend that…” or “It has been suggested that…” This would not only reduce repetition but also enrich the essay’s complexity. Additionally, using more passive constructions or conditional sentences could add depth. For example, instead of repeatedly stating “individuals believe,” the writer could say, “It is often believed by individuals that…” to introduce variety.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits a high level of grammatical accuracy, with only minor errors present. For instance, the phrase “a number of people argue the better solution is for each of us to contribute” could benefit from a comma before “is” to enhance clarity. Furthermore, the use of punctuation is mostly correct, but there are instances where commas could improve readability, such as in the sentence, “Private citizens, meanwhile, have shown repeatedly that when given the freedom to act as they see fit, they will very frequently do so in an efficient, responsible and productive manner.” The placement of commas helps to break up lengthy sentences and clarify meaning.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy and punctuation skills, the writer should focus on proofreading for comma usage, particularly in complex sentences. Practicing the rules of comma placement—especially in lists and before conjunctions in compound sentences—will enhance clarity. Additionally, the writer might benefit from reviewing subject-verb agreement in more complex sentences to ensure consistency and correctness throughout the essay.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong grasp of grammatical range and accuracy, meriting a Band Score of 8. By incorporating a wider variety of sentence structures and refining punctuation usage, the writer can further elevate their writing proficiency.

Bài sửa mẫu

In recent years, the issue of global warming has gained prominence among environmental concerns. Some argue that the government should take responsibility for addressing the perceived threat, but others suggest that it is best handled by individual citizens. In this essay, I will consider both views and explain why I agree with the latter group.

There are several reasons why many individuals turn to the government when it comes to dealing with problematic situations. Some feel the state is the only party with sufficient resources to adequately address large problems. Others believe politicians possess a deeper understanding of national and global challenges and a better knowledge of how to deal with them. There are also those who have a sense of entitlement and simply believe that more governance is the answer to all of our problems, including Earth’s rising temperature.

On the other hand, a number of people argue that the better solution is for each of us to contribute in our own way to resolve this issue. This group often points to the inherent inefficiency and even wastefulness of government. They state that individuals are generally more likely to make informed decisions about how best to solve dilemmas related to their personal welfare than bureaucrats with vested interests in specific outcomes. They further note that individuals inevitably make better decisions when allocating their own resources than politicians do when spending money that is not their own on others.

In my opinion, the second argument makes substantially more sense than the first. A quick look at American history, for example, demonstrates the significant failures of even one of the most powerful and economically advanced governments in the world, in cases such as the so-called Wars on Poverty, Drugs, and Terror. Private citizens, meanwhile, have consistently shown that when given the freedom to act as they see fit, they often act efficiently, responsibly, and productively.

In conclusion, while some state we must depend on the government to lead the way in the fight against the warming of the Earth, I believe this view is misguided. Based on the fact that individuals have a better track record than governments of not only solving problems but doing so more sensibly, I think it’s clear they should be left to address this issue as they see fit.