Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?"

In recent technological and digital development, it is true that advertisements are increasingly prevalent in our life on a daily basis. From my own perspective, this tendency does have a positive influence on customer’s purchasing habits.

To begin with, advertising strategies play a crucial role in providing purchasers with a variety of necessary information about the products and services. Most companies from all around the world, especially the prominent ones in the global trade market, have been effectively employing the marketing approach which releases a large volume of specific details, the originality and top-quality characteristics of their own commodities and utilities with the aim of grabbing customer’s attraction to them. As a result, people can make better shopping choices since they can make a comparison of these products from different brands and make a decision to select the most suitable for their needs. For instance, through watching TV commercials about distinguished brands of shampoo goods, I can determine the one that suits me best for me. Therefore, advertisements lead to the symbiotic relationships between customers and sellers, which help people easily opt for the products, and in turn, increase revenue and profits of the sale agents in the long run.

Furthermore, advertisements can raise people’s awareness and knowledge about product development. In fact, Advertisers have been launching several marketing campaigns and short commercial videos on TV or other media, which have been designed with animated images and informative content about a wide range of themes. Consequently, people are able to discover more about novel innovations or outstanding evolutions, such as technological devices, or AI applications in our daily life, etc. It is beneficial for people to keep up with the contemporary tendency by those enthralling commercials. My nephew, for instance, perceives a lot about different features of smartphones or the iPad since she watches many adverts about digital gadgets on TV.

In conclusion, I personally believe that people are affected in positive manners by several advertising strategies, including significant information provision of commodities and boosting the general knowledge about the growth of products.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

"it is true that" -> "indeed"
Explanation: Replacing "it is true that" with "indeed" adds a touch of formality to the statement, aligning it more with academic style.
"habit." -> "behavior."
Explanation: Substituting "habit" with "behavior" introduces a more precise term, making the sentence more academically refined.
"To begin with," -> "Firstly,"
Explanation: Transitioning from "To begin with" to "Firstly" maintains the flow while using a more formal introductory phrase.
"all around" -> "across"
Explanation: Replacing "all around" with "across" provides a slightly more formal and sophisticated expression.
"approach which releases" -> "approach that disseminates"
Explanation: Changing "approach which releases" to "approach that disseminates" enhances precision and formal language.
"specific details, the originality and top-quality characteristics" -> "specific details, as well as the originality and top-quality characteristics"
Explanation: Adding "as well as" improves the connection between the elements listed, contributing to better sentence structure.
"attraction to them." -> "attention to their products."
Explanation: Substituting "attraction to them" with "attention to their products" results in a more formal and direct expression.
"since they can make a comparison" -> "as they can compare"
Explanation: Replacing "since they can make a comparison" with "as they can compare" offers a more concise and formal expression.
"opt for the products, and in turn, increase" -> "choose products, thereby increasing"
Explanation: Changing "opt for the products, and in turn, increase" to "choose products, thereby increasing" improves clarity and formality.
"Moreover, advertisements can raise" -> "Furthermore, advertising can enhance"
Explanation: Transitioning from "Moreover, advertisements can raise" to "Furthermore, advertising can enhance" maintains coherence and elevates the formality of the sentence.
"Advertisers have been launching" -> "Advertisers launch"
Explanation: Simplifying "Advertisers have been launching" to "Advertisers launch" maintains clarity and avoids unnecessary complexity.
"short commercial videos on TV or other media" -> "brief commercials on television or other platforms"
Explanation: Substituting "short commercial videos on TV or other media" with "brief commercials on television or other platforms" enhances precision and formality.
"novel innovations or outstanding evolutions" -> "innovations or notable developments"
Explanation: Replacing "novel innovations or outstanding evolutions" with "innovations or notable developments" offers a more refined and formal expression.
"perceives a lot about different features" -> "learns about various features"
Explanation: Changing "perceives a lot about different features" to "learns about various features" provides a clearer and more academic description.
"enthralling commercials." -> "captivating advertisements."
Explanation: Substituting "enthralling commercials" with "captivating advertisements" maintains the positive tone while using a more sophisticated term.
"I personally believe that" -> "I am of the opinion that"
Explanation: Transitioning from "I personally believe that" to "I am of the opinion that" introduces a more formal expression of personal belief.
"positive manners" -> "positive ways"
Explanation: Replacing "positive manners" with "positive ways" offers a more standard and formal phrase.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay provides a comprehensive response to the prompt, addressing both the positive and negative aspects of the increasing prevalence of advertisements in everyday life. The writer acknowledges the growth in advertisements due to technological advancements and then proceeds to present a strong argument in favor of their positive influence on consumer behavior.
- How to improve: While the response is thorough, consider enhancing the introduction by explicitly stating the intention to discuss both sides of the issue. This will provide a clearer roadmap for the reader.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear and consistent stance in favor of the positive impact of advertisements. The author expresses a strong belief in the positive influence of advertising on consumer choices and product awareness.
- How to improve: To further strengthen the position, the writer could incorporate a brief acknowledgment of the opposing viewpoint, demonstrating a nuanced understanding of the topic.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively presents and develops ideas, supporting them with specific examples and illustrations. The writer provides detailed explanations of how advertising strategies contribute to informed consumer choices and increased product awareness.
- How to improve: To enhance the essay’s depth, consider incorporating more varied examples or additional dimensions to the arguments, demonstrating a nuanced understanding of the topic.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay predominantly stays on topic, discussing the positive influence of advertisements as prompted. However, there are instances where the focus on positive aspects is more pronounced than the negative, potentially creating a slight imbalance.
- How to improve: Ensure a more balanced treatment of both positive and negative aspects to present a more well-rounded argument. This can be achieved by dedicating equal attention to both sides of the issue throughout the essay.

In summary, the essay demonstrates a strong command of the English language and effectively addresses the task requirements. To further improve, consider refining the introduction for clarity, acknowledging the opposing viewpoint to strengthen the argument, adding depth to the examples provided, and ensuring a more balanced treatment of positive and negative aspects throughout the essay.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonably logical organization. The introduction clearly introduces the topic and the writer’s perspective. The body paragraphs follow a coherent structure, with the first discussing the role of advertising in providing information and the second highlighting its impact on raising awareness. However, there are instances where the flow could be smoother, such as the transition between the two main points.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider refining transition sentences between paragraphs to ensure a seamless connection between ideas. Additionally, a more distinct concluding paragraph summarizing key points could contribute to a stronger overall structure.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay utilizes paragraphs effectively, with a clear introduction, two well-structured body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument, contributing to coherence.
- How to improve: While the overall paragraph structure is sound, pay attention to ensuring a smooth transition between paragraphs. Introduce the second main point more explicitly to enhance the overall coherence of the essay.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, including transition words (e.g., "To begin with," "Furthermore," "In conclusion") and pronouns ("this tendency," "these products"). These devices contribute to the overall coherence of the essay and guide the reader through the writer’s arguments.
- How to improve: To further diversify cohesive devices, consider incorporating more advanced linking words and phrases. Additionally, ensure consistency in the use of pronouns to avoid potential confusion. For example, in the second paragraph, clarify the antecedent of "she" to maintain clarity.

Overall, the essay effectively achieves a band score of 7 for Coherence and Cohesion. To enhance coherence, focus on refining transition sentences, introducing main points more explicitly, and incorporating a more distinct concluding paragraph. Additionally, continue diversifying cohesive devices and ensure consistency in pronoun usage for further improvement.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a satisfactory range of vocabulary, incorporating words and phrases that convey the intended meaning. There is an attempt to use varied language, and some academic and descriptive terms are present, such as "prominent," "symbiotic relationships," and "novel innovations."
- How to improve: To enhance the score, strive for more diversity in vocabulary, especially in expressing ideas or arguments. Consider incorporating more sophisticated terms or nuanced vocabulary where appropriate. Additionally, ensure that the usage of advanced vocabulary aligns seamlessly with the context to avoid any forced or unnatural expressions.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary with reasonable precision. However, there are instances where word choices could be more precise. For example, the phrase "several advertising strategies" could benefit from specifying the types of strategies.
- How to improve: Aim for greater precision by choosing words that precisely convey the intended meaning. Instead of using broad terms like "several advertising strategies," specify the strategies, such as "targeted marketing campaigns" or "engaging promotional tactics." This will add depth and clarity to your expression.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay displays a generally accurate level of spelling. However, there are some minor errors, such as "purchase’s" instead of "purchasers" and "evolutions" instead of "innovations."
- How to improve: Pay close attention to spelling details, especially when using possessive forms ("purchasers") and choosing words with similar spellings but different meanings ("innovations" instead of "evolutions"). Proofread your work carefully to catch and correct such errors. Additionally, consider using spelling and grammar check tools to enhance accuracy.

In summary, while the essay exhibits an acceptable level of lexical resource, further improvement can be achieved by expanding the range of vocabulary, ensuring precision in word choices, and maintaining consistent spelling accuracy. Strive for a more nuanced and varied expression of ideas to elevate the overall quality of your language use.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a commendable range of sentence structures. It effectively utilizes various sentence types, including complex and compound sentences, contributing to the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay. For instance, the writer employs complex sentences like "Most companies from all around the world, especially the prominent ones in the global trade market, have been effectively employing the marketing approach," showcasing complexity and clarity simultaneously.
- How to improve: To further enhance the variety and effectiveness of sentence structures, consider incorporating more compound-complex sentences and experimenting with different syntactical structures. Additionally, ensure that the complexity introduced does not compromise clarity, and each sentence serves a clear communicative purpose.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a high level of grammatical accuracy. The writer adeptly navigates complex grammatical structures without major errors. Punctuation is generally used correctly, contributing to the overall coherence of the essay. For example, "From my own perspective, this tendency does have a positive influence on customer’s purchasing habits," showcases accurate grammar and punctuation usage.
- How to improve: While the essay is grammatically strong, pay attention to minor errors, such as the missing article in "a positive influence on customer’s purchasing habits." Proofreading for these minor issues will further elevate the grammatical accuracy. Additionally, consider more nuanced punctuation use to enhance sentence flow and rhythm.

In summary, the essay demonstrates a strong command of grammatical range and accuracy. To elevate it to an even higher level, the writer can focus on incorporating more diverse sentence structures and paying meticulous attention to minor grammatical and punctuation details.

Bài sửa mẫu

In the era of technological advancement, it is undeniable that advertisements have become increasingly prevalent in our daily lives. From my perspective, this trend indeed has a positive impact on consumers’ buying behaviors.

Firstly, advertising strategies play a crucial role in furnishing consumers with essential information about products and services. Companies worldwide, particularly those prominent in the global market, employ marketing approaches that disseminate specific details, as well as the originality and top-quality characteristics of their offerings. This approach aims to capture the attention of consumers, enabling them to make informed purchasing decisions. Consequently, individuals can compare products from different brands, facilitating the selection of the most suitable option for their needs. For example, by watching brief commercials on television featuring various shampoo brands, I can effectively identify the one that best suits my preferences. Therefore, advertisements foster symbiotic relationships between customers and sellers, facilitating consumer choices and ultimately boosting the long-term revenue and profits of sales agents.

Furthermore, advertising serves as a means to enhance people’s awareness and knowledge of product development. Advertisers launch various marketing campaigns and captivating advertisements on television or other platforms, featuring animated images and informative content on a wide range of topics. This approach enables individuals to learn about novel innovations or notable developments, such as advancements in technology or the applications of artificial intelligence in daily life. This exposure is advantageous for individuals to stay informed about contemporary trends through these captivating advertisements. For instance, my nephew has gained insights into different features of smartphones and iPads by watching adverts about digital gadgets on TV.

In conclusion, I am of the opinion that advertising positively influences people by providing significant information about products and enhancing general knowledge about their development. This positive impact, characterized by informed consumer choices and increased awareness, highlights the constructive role of advertisements in our lives.

Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?”