Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil, or brush. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or a negative development?

In our contemporary society, it has become a rarity for one to use a pen, pencil, or brush to write. The development of technology and a higher demand for transmitting information could be the main catalysts for this decline. While these changes may seem concerning, they also bring about significant advantages.

Such a phenomenon might be attributable to recent technological innovations and the greater need of communication. First of all, the advent of smartphones, laptops, or tablets has led to the less use of handwriting in today's world. These devices provide users with innovative features to aid their writing, which renders the conventional way become inconvenient and less effective. In addition to this transformation, modern people are required to disseminate a larger amount of information per day on average. For example, a university student, nowadays, has to submit significantly more essays and assignments than his or her grandparents. Consequently, it is impossible for one to adopt their obsolete approach to meet today world's requirements.

Despite the reservations about negative aspects of this trend, I believe that it is a positive development. On the one hand, according to many studies, reduced handwriting might be harmful for their cognitive ability and critical thinking skills. Therefore, these people later risk losing their jobs or even are unable to secure employment. On the other hand, no one can deny the tremendous impact that new technologies, like computers and telephones, have positively affected our writing performance. The most remarkable effect would be how fast it takes for one to complete this task in comparison with the traditional way, which helps us save time and labor.

In conclusion, the fact that handwriting is on the wane might be attributed to the prevalence of new gadgets and further demand for sharing information. Although it might be worrying for certain individuals who care about the young's prospect, I would argue that this tendency has completely transformed one's writing experience, especially in terms of speed.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"In our contemporary society" -> "In contemporary society"
Explanation: Removing "our" simplifies the phrase and aligns better with formal academic writing, which typically avoids possessive pronouns in generalizations.
"it has become a rarity for one to use" -> "it is increasingly rare for individuals to use"
Explanation: "It is increasingly rare" is more precise and formal than "it has become a rarity," and "individuals" is a more formal term than "one."
"could be the main catalysts" -> "may serve as the primary drivers"
Explanation: "May serve as the primary drivers" is more specific and academically formal than "could be the main catalysts."
"the greater need of communication" -> "the growing need for communication"
Explanation: "The growing need for" is more precise and formal, and "for" is the correct preposition to use with "need."
"the less use of handwriting" -> "the reduced use of handwriting"
Explanation: "Reduced" is a more formal and precise term than "less," which is vague and informal in this context.
"renders the conventional way become inconvenient" -> "makes the conventional method less convenient"
Explanation: "Makes the conventional method less convenient" is grammatically correct and more formal than "renders the conventional way become inconvenient."
"today world’s requirements" -> "the requirements of today’s world"
Explanation: "The requirements of today’s world" is grammatically correct and more formal than "today world’s requirements."
"obsolete approach" -> "outdated methods"
Explanation: "Outdated methods" is a more precise and formal term than "obsolete approach," which is somewhat vague and informal.
"According to many studies" -> "Numerous studies suggest"
Explanation: "Numerous studies suggest" is a more formal and academically appropriate way to introduce evidence.
"harmful for their cognitive ability" -> "adversely affect their cognitive abilities"
Explanation: "Adversely affect their cognitive abilities" is more precise and formal, improving the academic tone.
"are unable to secure employment" -> "may struggle to secure employment"
Explanation: "May struggle to secure employment" is more tentative and less definitive, which is more appropriate in academic writing.
"no one can deny" -> "it is undeniable"
Explanation: "It is undeniable" is a more formal and concise way to express certainty, fitting better in academic discourse.
"The most remarkable effect would be how fast it takes" -> "The most significant advantage is the speed"
Explanation: "The most significant advantage is the speed" is more direct and formal, avoiding the informal construction "how fast it takes."
"completely transformed one’s writing experience" -> "significantly enhanced the writing experience"
Explanation: "Significantly enhanced the writing experience" is more precise and formal, avoiding the absolute and informal "completely transformed."
"especially in terms of speed" -> "particularly in terms of speed"
Explanation: "Particularly" is a more formal adverb than "especially," which is slightly less formal and more conversational.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt. It identifies reasons for the decline in handwriting, such as technological advancements and increased information demands. The author also discusses whether this trend is positive or negative, ultimately arguing that it is a positive development. The essay provides relevant examples, such as the increased workload for students compared to previous generations, which supports the reasons given.
- How to improve: To enhance the response further, the essay could benefit from a more explicit discussion of the negative aspects of reduced handwriting. While the author acknowledges potential cognitive drawbacks, a more balanced exploration of both sides could strengthen the argument. Including specific examples or studies that illustrate the negative impacts could provide a more comprehensive view.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that the decline of handwriting is a positive development. This stance is consistently reflected throughout the essay, particularly in the second body paragraph where the author contrasts the negative implications of reduced handwriting with the benefits of technology. The use of phrases like "I believe" and "I would argue" reinforces the author’s viewpoint.
- How to improve: To further solidify the clarity of the position, the author could use transitional phrases to explicitly connect the discussion of negative aspects to the overall positive stance. For instance, acknowledging the concerns before reiterating the benefits could create a more nuanced argument while still keeping the main position clear.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas logically, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the prompt. The reasons for the decline in handwriting are well articulated, and the author supports these ideas with relevant examples. However, the support for the positive aspects of the trend could be more robust. The mention of studies regarding cognitive abilities is a good start, but it lacks depth and specific details.
- How to improve: To improve the support for ideas, the author should include more detailed examples or data to substantiate claims about the benefits of technology on writing performance. For instance, referencing specific studies that demonstrate improved efficiency or creativity through digital writing tools would enhance the argument’s credibility.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic throughout, discussing both the reasons for the decline in handwriting and the implications of this trend. There are no significant deviations from the prompt, and the author consistently relates back to the central theme of handwriting’s decline.
- How to improve: While the essay stays on topic, the author could enhance coherence by ensuring that each paragraph clearly ties back to the main argument. For example, reiterating how each point made relates to the overall positive or negative assessment of the trend could strengthen the focus and clarity of the essay.

In summary, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the task and presents a well-structured argument. To achieve an even higher band score, the author should consider providing more balanced discussions of both sides, enhancing the depth of support for their ideas, and ensuring that all points clearly connect back to the main argument.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the topic and the writer’s perspective. The body paragraphs are organized to first address the reasons for the decline in handwriting and then to discuss the implications of this trend. For instance, the first body paragraph effectively identifies technological advancements and increased information demands as primary reasons. However, the transition between discussing the negative aspects and the positive implications could be smoother, as the shift feels somewhat abrupt.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using clearer topic sentences that explicitly connect the ideas between paragraphs. For example, after discussing the reasons for the decline in handwriting, a transitional sentence could bridge into the discussion of its implications, such as: "While these factors raise concerns about cognitive skills, they also highlight the benefits of modern technology in enhancing writing efficiency."
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs effectively, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. The introduction sets the stage, the first body paragraph discusses reasons for the decline, and the second body paragraph evaluates the implications. However, the second body paragraph could be better structured, as it mixes negative and positive aspects without a clear delineation, which may confuse readers.
- How to improve: To improve paragraph structure, consider separating the discussion of negative and positive aspects into distinct paragraphs. This would allow for a more focused analysis of each viewpoint. For instance, you could have one paragraph dedicated to the potential cognitive drawbacks of reduced handwriting, followed by another that elaborates on the advantages of technology in writing.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "first of all," "in addition to this," and "on the one hand." These phrases help guide the reader through the argument. However, there are moments where the use of cohesive devices could be more varied. For example, the phrase "on the other hand" is used effectively, but the essay could benefit from additional linking words to enhance the connections between ideas.
- How to improve: To diversify the range of cohesive devices, incorporate synonyms and alternative phrases that serve similar functions. For example, instead of repeatedly using "on the one hand" and "on the other hand," you could use "conversely," "in contrast," or "alternatively." Additionally, consider using more complex cohesive devices, such as "not only… but also" to emphasize points and create more sophisticated connections between ideas.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of coherence and cohesion, refining the logical flow between paragraphs, enhancing paragraph structure, and diversifying cohesive devices will help elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary appropriate for the topic. Phrases such as "contemporary society," "technological innovations," and "obsolete approach" showcase a solid command of language. However, there are instances where vocabulary could be more varied or sophisticated. For example, the repeated use of "writing" and "information" could be expanded with synonyms like "composition," "script," or "data dissemination" to enhance lexical variety.
- How to improve: To improve, the writer should aim to incorporate a broader array of synonyms and expressions. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "writing," consider using "composing" or "inscribing" in different contexts. Engaging with vocabulary exercises or reading more academic texts could also help in discovering new words and phrases.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary correctly, but there are moments of imprecision. For example, the phrase "the less use of handwriting" should be "the lesser use of handwriting" or "the decreased use of handwriting." Additionally, the phrase "the conventional way become inconvenient" is grammatically incorrect and should be "the conventional way has become inconvenient." Such errors can detract from the clarity of the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance precision, the writer should focus on grammatical structures and ensure that phrases are correctly formed. Reviewing grammar rules, particularly around verb tenses and comparative structures, can help. Additionally, reading and analyzing well-structured essays can provide insights into precise vocabulary usage.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains a few spelling errors, such as "today world’s requirements," which should be "today’s world’s requirements." Such mistakes can undermine the overall impression of the essay and indicate a lack of attention to detail.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should adopt a proofreading strategy after completing the essay. This could involve reading the essay aloud to catch errors or using spell-check tools. Additionally, maintaining a list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them can be beneficial.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a commendable level of vocabulary usage, there are areas for improvement in terms of variety, precision, and spelling accuracy. By focusing on these aspects, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their lexical resource in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures. For instance, the use of complex sentences such as "While these changes may seem concerning, they also bring about significant advantages" showcases the writer’s ability to connect ideas effectively. Additionally, the phrase "the advent of smartphones, laptops, or tablets has led to the less use of handwriting" employs a compound structure that adds depth to the argument. However, there are instances of repetitive sentence beginnings and a reliance on similar structures, such as "On the one hand" and "On the other hand," which can detract from the overall variety.
- How to improve: To enhance the diversity of sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more varied introductory phrases and transition words. For example, instead of repeatedly using "On the one hand" and "On the other hand," alternatives like "Conversely" or "In contrast" could be employed. Additionally, integrating more complex and compound-complex sentences would further enrich the essay. Practicing sentence combining exercises could also help in creating more varied sentence forms.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy, with only a few minor errors. For example, the phrase "which renders the conventional way become inconvenient" contains a grammatical mistake; it should be "which renders the conventional way inconvenient." Punctuation is mostly correct, but there are instances where commas could enhance clarity, such as before "which helps us save time and labor" to separate the clauses more effectively.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on proofreading for common errors, particularly with verb forms and sentence constructions. Engaging in grammar exercises that target specific weaknesses, such as verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement, would be beneficial. Additionally, practicing punctuation rules, especially regarding the use of commas in complex sentences, can help clarify meaning and improve overall readability.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical range and accuracy, there are opportunities for improvement in diversifying sentence structures and refining grammatical precision. By addressing these areas, the writer can aim for a higher band score in future writing tasks.

Bài sửa mẫu

In our contemporary society, it has become increasingly rare for individuals to use a pen, pencil, or brush to write. The development of technology and the growing need for communication may serve as the primary drivers of this decline. While these changes may seem concerning, they also bring about significant advantages.

This phenomenon can be attributed to recent technological innovations and the heightened demand for communication. First of all, the advent of smartphones, laptops, and tablets has led to a reduced use of handwriting in today’s world. These devices provide users with innovative features to aid their writing, which makes the conventional method less convenient and less effective. In addition to this transformation, modern individuals are required to disseminate a larger amount of information each day on average. For example, a university student today has to submit significantly more essays and assignments than his or her grandparents did. Consequently, it is impossible for one to adopt outdated methods to meet the requirements of today’s world.

Despite the reservations about the negative aspects of this trend, I believe that it is a positive development. On the one hand, numerous studies suggest that the reduced use of handwriting may adversely affect individuals’ cognitive abilities and critical thinking skills. Therefore, these individuals may struggle to secure employment later on. On the other hand, it is undeniable that new technologies, such as computers and smartphones, have significantly enhanced the writing experience. The most significant advantage is the speed at which one can complete writing tasks compared to traditional methods, which helps us save time and effort.

In conclusion, the decline of handwriting can be attributed to the prevalence of new gadgets and the increasing demand for sharing information. Although it may be worrying for certain individuals who care about the prospects of the younger generation, I would argue that this tendency has completely transformed the writing experience, particularly in terms of speed.