Human teacher will be replaced by computer. Do you agree or disagree?
Human teacher will be replaced by computer. Do you agree or disagree?
Progressive and interactive though computers have become, in my opinion, it will still be necessary for students to have a human teacher in the future classroom. Firstly, despite being able to process information more efficiently than humans, computers are not likely to possess human-like thoughts and emotions. While computers cannot lend an ear to students' psychological issues, human teachers can. Specifically, human teachers will comfort their students and give them practical advice from their experience to overcome these issues. Therefore, with their outstanding capability to process information, computers are best suitable for working as teaching assistants for human teachers. Another problem facing computers is that they do not always operate properly, which might have negative impacts on students. There is a likelihood that computers will crash, or get viruses and malware. This can result in several errors, for example, slow or no response, giving fallacious answers, and even detrimental actions to students like an explosion due to power overload. To conclude, from my perspective, human educators will still play an integral part in the future class, assisted by computers with advancement and interactivity.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
Errors and Improvements:
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"Progressive and interactive though computers have become" -> "Although computers have advanced progressively and become interactive"
Explanation: The original phrase is somewhat awkward and informal. By restructuring the sentence and using "Although" instead of "Progressive and interactive though", the statement becomes clearer and more formal. -
"it will still be necessary" -> "it will remain necessary"
Explanation: "Still" can be replaced with "remain" to maintain the same meaning while sounding more formal and precise. -
"Firstly" -> "First and foremost"
Explanation: "Firstly" is less formal than "First and foremost". Using the latter adds emphasis and maintains the academic tone of the essay. -
"Despite being able to process information more efficiently than humans" -> "Although computers can process information more efficiently than humans"
Explanation: Replacing "Despite being able to" with "Although" makes the sentence more concise and formal. -
"human-like thoughts and emotions" -> "human-like cognition and emotions"
Explanation: "Thoughts and emotions" can be replaced with "cognition and emotions" for a more precise and formal expression. -
"lend an ear" -> "listen"
Explanation: "Lend an ear" is an idiomatic expression that is too informal for academic writing. "Listen" is a more suitable alternative. -
"comfort their students" -> "provide emotional support to their students"
Explanation: "Comfort" can be replaced with "provide emotional support" to convey a clearer and more formal meaning. -
"from their experience" -> "based on their experiences"
Explanation: "From their experience" is slightly informal. "Based on their experiences" maintains formality and clarity. -
"outstanding capability" -> "remarkable capacity"
Explanation: "Outstanding capability" can be replaced with "remarkable capacity" for a more sophisticated expression. -
"best suitable" -> "most suitable"
Explanation: "Best suitable" is redundant; "most suitable" is more concise and formal. -
"Another problem facing computers is that they do not always operate properly" -> "Another issue computers encounter is occasional operational inefficiency"
Explanation: The original phrase is somewhat repetitive and less formal. The suggested alternative is more concise and maintains the academic tone. -
"there is a likelihood that" -> "there is a possibility of"
Explanation: "Likelihood" is slightly informal. "Possibility" is a more formal alternative. -
"crash" -> "malfunction"
Explanation: "Crash" is colloquial; "malfunction" is more formal. -
"get viruses and malware" -> "be infected with viruses and malware"
Explanation: Restructuring the sentence with "be infected with" makes it more formal and precise. -
"result in several errors" -> "lead to various errors"
Explanation: "Result in" can be replaced with "lead to" for a more formal expression. -
"giving fallacious answers" -> "providing erroneous responses"
Explanation: "Giving fallacious answers" can be replaced with "providing erroneous responses" for a more precise and formal statement. -
"detrimental actions to students like an explosion due to power overload" -> "harmful consequences for students, such as power overload leading to explosions"
Explanation: The original phrase is somewhat awkward and informal. The suggested alternative is clearer and maintains formality. -
"To conclude, from my perspective" -> "In conclusion, in my view"
Explanation: "To conclude" is more informal; "In conclusion" is the standard academic phrase. Additionally, "from my perspective" can be replaced with "in my view" for a more formal expression.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Task Response: 7 – UNDER WORD
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses the prompt by expressing a clear opinion on whether human teachers will be replaced by computers. It acknowledges the role of computers in education but asserts the necessity of human teachers.
- How to improve: While the essay presents a stance on the issue, it could enhance its depth by exploring potential counterarguments or discussing implications further.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a consistent stance throughout, arguing in favor of the continued necessity of human teachers alongside computers in the classroom.
- How to improve: To strengthen clarity, ensure each paragraph reinforces the central position and avoids ambiguity.
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas clearly but lacks depth in elaboration. It mentions the limitations of computers and the unique contributions of human teachers but could benefit from further development and supporting evidence.
- How to improve: Expand on each point with specific examples, research findings, or personal anecdotes to enhance the credibility and persuasiveness of the argument.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic, focusing on the comparison between human teachers and computers in the context of education. However, it briefly digresses into potential technical issues with computers.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, limit discussions to the central argument and avoid tangential topics unless directly relevant to the main point.
Overall, while the essay effectively argues for the continued role of human teachers in education, it could strengthen its response by providing more thorough analysis, deeper exploration of ideas, and maintaining strict relevance to the prompt. Additionally, expanding the word count to meet the requirements would allow for more comprehensive coverage of the topic.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of information. It begins with a clear introduction presenting the writer’s stance on the topic. The body paragraphs follow a structured approach, discussing different aspects of why human teachers are still necessary despite the advancement of computers. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates the writer’s opinion.
- How to improve: While the essay maintains logical organization overall, there is room for improvement in the development of ideas within paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on one central idea and provide sufficient elaboration and supporting details. Additionally, transitioning between paragraphs could be smoother to enhance coherence.
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Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to organize its content. Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the argument, such as the limitations of computers or the role of human teachers. Clear topic sentences introduce each paragraph’s main idea, and there is a logical progression of ideas within paragraphs.
- How to improve: To further improve paragraphing, ensure that each paragraph maintains unity and coherence. Develop each idea thoroughly within its respective paragraph, providing examples or evidence to support the arguments. Additionally, consider varying sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a range of cohesive devices to connect ideas and maintain coherence. Transition words and phrases such as "firstly," "specifically," and "to conclude" help guide the reader through the writer’s arguments. Additionally, pronouns like "they" and "this" facilitate coherence by referring back to previously mentioned concepts.
- How to improve: While the essay effectively utilizes cohesive devices, further diversification could enhance its coherence. Incorporating a wider variety of transition words and phrases can create a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs. Additionally, consider using cohesive devices such as parallel structure or repetition to reinforce key points and improve clarity.
Overall, the essay demonstrates strong coherence and cohesion, effectively organizing ideas and utilizing cohesive devices to maintain clarity and progression. To enhance coherence further, focus on developing ideas within paragraphs and diversifying the use of cohesive devices.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6
- Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a fairly wide range of vocabulary, incorporating words such as "progressive," "interactive," "possess," "fallacious," and "integral." However, there is room for improvement in the variety and sophistication of vocabulary used. For instance, the phrase "progressive and interactive though computers have become" could be enhanced with more precise adjectives or descriptors to convey a deeper understanding of technological advancement.
- How to improve: To enrich the lexical resource, consider incorporating more nuanced vocabulary to articulate ideas with greater precision and depth. For instance, instead of using "progressive," you might employ terms like "evolutionary" or "cutting-edge" to convey a sense of continuous advancement in technology. Additionally, employing more discipline-specific or context-specific terminology where relevant can enhance the sophistication of vocabulary.
- Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary with sufficient precision, such as "process information," "possess human-like thoughts and emotions," and "teaching assistants." However, there are instances where vocabulary could be more precise to avoid ambiguity or improve clarity of expression. For example, the phrase "from my perspective" is used to qualify the conclusion, but a more precise term like "in my view" might enhance the clarity of the author’s stance.
- How to improve: To enhance precision in vocabulary usage, strive for clarity and specificity in expression. Instead of relying on general terms like "from my perspective," consider using more definitive language to assert the author’s viewpoint. Additionally, when discussing complex concepts or ideas, ensure that the chosen vocabulary accurately reflects the intended meaning to avoid any misinterpretation by the reader.
- Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: Spelling accuracy in the essay is generally satisfactory. However, there are a few instances where errors occur, such as "fallacious" being spelled as "falacious." While these errors do not significantly impede comprehension, attention to detail in spelling would enhance the overall professionalism and polish of the essay.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, consider utilizing spelling and grammar checking tools to identify and correct errors before finalizing the essay. Additionally, reviewing written work carefully, preferably after a brief interval to gain a fresh perspective, can help catch any overlooked spelling mistakes. Developing a habit of proofreading systematically can contribute to improved spelling accuracy over time.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences ("Progressive and interactive though computers have become"), compound sentences ("While computers cannot lend an ear to students’ psychological issues, human teachers can"), and conditional structures ("There is a likelihood that computers will crash, or get viruses and malware"). These structures contribute to the coherence and sophistication of the essay.
- How to improve: While the essay already utilizes a good range of structures, incorporating more complex constructions such as parallelism or inversion could further enhance its sophistication. For instance, employing inversion in introductory phrases or using parallel structures for emphasis and clarity can elevate the quality of expression.
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of grammar and punctuation. Sentences are well-structured, and errors are minimal. However, there are a few instances where minor grammatical errors occur, such as subject-verb agreement ("Progressive and interactive though computers have become") and punctuation errors ("This can result in several errors, for example, slow or no response, giving fallacious answers, and even detrimental actions to students like an explosion due to power overload").
- How to improve: To further enhance grammatical accuracy, attention to subject-verb agreement and punctuation consistency is advised. Proofreading for errors in parallelism and ensuring that punctuation marks are used consistently and appropriately can refine the overall clarity and precision of the essay. Additionally, revisiting complex sentence structures to ensure their grammatical correctness would strengthen the essay’s coherence.
Overall, the essay demonstrates a proficient command of grammatical range and accuracy, with room for refinement in minor errors and further diversification of sentence structures.
Bài sửa mẫu
While computers have advanced progressively and become more interactive, I firmly believe that human teachers will remain indispensable in future classrooms. Despite their ability to process information more efficiently than humans, computers are unlikely to possess human-like thoughts and emotions. Unlike computers, human teachers can empathize with students and provide invaluable emotional support. They offer comfort and practical advice, drawing from their own experiences, to help students overcome psychological issues. Therefore, while computers excel at processing information, they are best suited to serve as teaching assistants to human educators.
Furthermore, computers are prone to technical issues that can negatively impact students’ learning experience. There is always a risk of computers crashing or being infected with viruses and malware. These technical glitches can lead to errors such as slow or unresponsive behavior, incorrect answers, or even dangerous situations like power overload explosions. Consequently, relying solely on computers for teaching could jeopardize the quality of education.
In conclusion, I maintain that human teachers will continue to play a crucial role in future classrooms, supported by computers with their advancements in technology and interactivity. The combination of human empathy and computer efficiency will provide students with a well-rounded and effective learning environment.
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