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In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many nations, a small percentage of individuals command exceptionally high salaries, prompting a debate about whether this phenomenon is beneficial for the country or if it necessitates governmental intervention to impose salary caps. This essay will explore both perspectives, ultimately supporting the notion that individuals should be allowed to earn unlimited incomes based on their capabilities and contributions.

On one hand, some argue that governments should impose limits on salaries to address the widening wealth gap within society. High earners often inhabit a different socioeconomic stratum, which can lead to increased social stratification and inequality. For instance, affluent individuals typically have access to superior educational and healthcare resources, allowing them to improve their living conditions over time. In contrast, those with lower incomes may struggle to meet basic needs, resulting in financial strain and limited opportunities for upward mobility. While capping salaries could potentially reduce these disparities, it might also boost ambition and innovation among the populace, ultimately hindering economic growth and fostering a culture of complacency.

Conversely, I contend that permitting individuals to earn without restrictions can significantly enhance a country's economy. The drive for higher earnings often motivates people to work harder and increase their productivity, which can lead to overall economic advancement. Furthermore, as individuals accumulate wealth, they contribute more in taxes, enabling governments to invest in essential public services such as education and healthcare. This investment not only improves the quality of life for all citizens but also creates an environment conducive to further economic development. If everyone were guaranteed equal earnings regardless of effort or contribution, it could diminish the incentive for hard work and innovation necessary for national progress.

In conclusion, while imposing salary limits might help mitigate income disparities among citizens, allowing individuals the freedom to earn as much as they can will substantially boost the economy and foster a culture of productivity. Therefore, I believe that unrestricted earning potential is ultimately beneficial for society as a whole.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "a small percentage of individuals command exceptionally high salaries" -> "a small proportion of individuals command exceptionally high salaries"
    Explanation: Replacing "percentage" with "proportion" is more precise in this context, as it refers to the ratio of individuals with high salaries to the total population, which is more appropriate in an academic discussion about demographics and economic trends.

  2. "prompting a debate" -> "eliciting debate"
    Explanation: "Eliciting" is a more formal and precise term that suggests the act of bringing about or provoking a response, which is more suitable for academic writing than the more colloquial "prompting."

  3. "necessitates governmental intervention" -> "requires governmental intervention"
    Explanation: "Necessitates" can imply a sense of urgency or obligation that might be too strong for this context. "Requires" is more neutral and appropriate for describing the need for action in a formal essay.

  4. "impose salary caps" -> "impose salary limits"
    Explanation: "Salary caps" is a common idiom, but "salary limits" is more formal and avoids colloquialism, aligning better with academic style.

  5. "On one hand" -> "On one side"
    Explanation: "On one side" is a more formal expression commonly used in academic writing to introduce contrasting viewpoints, whereas "on one hand" is more conversational.

  6. "affluent individuals typically have access to superior educational and healthcare resources" -> "affluent individuals generally have access to superior educational and healthcare facilities"
    Explanation: "Facilities" is a more precise term than "resources" in this context, as it specifically refers to the infrastructure and services provided, which is more relevant to the discussion of healthcare and education.

  7. "resulting in financial strain and limited opportunities for upward mobility" -> "resulting in financial hardship and restricted opportunities for upward mobility"
    Explanation: "Financial hardship" is a more precise term than "financial strain," and "restricted" is more formal than "limited," enhancing the academic tone of the sentence.

  8. "boost ambition and innovation among the populace" -> "enhance ambition and innovation among the population"
    Explanation: "Enhance" is a more formal synonym for "boost," and "population" is the correct term for the collective people of a country or region, whereas "populace" is less commonly used and can be seen as slightly archaic.

  9. "The drive for higher earnings often motivates people to work harder" -> "The pursuit of higher earnings frequently motivates individuals to work more diligently"
    Explanation: "Pursuit" is a more formal synonym for "drive," and "individuals" is preferred over "people" in formal writing. "Work more diligently" is a more precise and formal expression than "work harder."

  10. "If everyone were guaranteed equal earnings regardless of effort or contribution" -> "If everyone were assured equal earnings regardless of effort or contribution"
    Explanation: "Assured" is a more formal synonym for "guaranteed," which fits better in an academic context, and it maintains the formal tone of the essay.

  11. "diminish the incentive for hard work and innovation" -> "reduce the incentive for diligent work and innovation"
    Explanation: "Reduce" is a more precise verb than "diminish" in this context, and "diligent" is a more formal adjective than "hard," aligning better with the academic style.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both sides of the argument regarding high salaries. The first body paragraph discusses the viewpoint advocating for salary caps, highlighting the potential for increased inequality and social stratification. The second body paragraph presents the opposing view, arguing for the benefits of unrestricted earnings on economic growth and productivity. The essay concludes with a clear stance supporting unlimited earning potential, which aligns well with the prompt’s requirement to discuss both views and provide a personal opinion.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer could provide more specific examples or statistics to support the claims made about the effects of high salaries on society and the economy. Additionally, addressing potential counterarguments more thoroughly could strengthen the discussion, demonstrating a deeper engagement with the complexities of the issue.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position throughout, consistently advocating for the idea that individuals should have the freedom to earn without restrictions. This stance is articulated in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. The writer’s opinion is evident, and the arguments presented are coherent and logically structured, making it easy for the reader to follow the author’s viewpoint.
    • How to improve: While the position is clear, the writer could further emphasize their stance by explicitly stating it in the topic sentences of each paragraph. This would enhance clarity and ensure that the reader is constantly reminded of the author’s perspective as they navigate through the arguments.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports ideas effectively, particularly in the second body paragraph, where the writer discusses the economic benefits of allowing high salaries. The argument is extended by linking higher earnings to increased productivity and tax contributions, which are well-articulated points. However, the first body paragraph could benefit from more depth, as it primarily outlines the issue without fully exploring the implications of salary caps.
    • How to improve: To improve the development of ideas, the writer should aim to provide more in-depth analysis and examples in both body paragraphs. For instance, including case studies or referencing specific countries that have implemented salary caps and their outcomes could provide a more robust argument. Additionally, exploring the potential drawbacks of both perspectives could add nuance to the discussion.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic throughout, addressing the central issue of high salaries and their implications for society. The writer does not deviate from the prompt, and all arguments presented are relevant to the discussion of whether salary limits should be imposed.
    • How to improve: To ensure continued focus, the writer should regularly refer back to the prompt in each paragraph, particularly when introducing new ideas. This practice can help maintain a strong connection to the topic and reinforce the relevance of each point made. Additionally, avoiding overly broad statements that may stray from the specific context of the prompt can help maintain clarity and focus.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the task requirements, effectively discusses both sides of the argument, and presents a clear personal opinion. With some enhancements in depth and specificity, it could achieve an even higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear and logical structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the topic and states the writer’s opinion. Each body paragraph addresses a distinct viewpoint, with the first paragraph discussing the arguments for salary caps and the second paragraph presenting the counterargument. The progression of ideas is coherent, with each paragraph building on the previous one. For example, the transition from discussing the negative impacts of high salaries on social inequality to the benefits of allowing unrestricted earnings is smooth and well-articulated.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization further, consider using more explicit linking phrases at the beginning of each paragraph, such as "Firstly," "On the other hand," or "In contrast," to guide the reader through the argumentation more clearly. Additionally, a more detailed summary of the key points in the conclusion could reinforce the logical flow of the essay.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the discussion. The introduction clearly sets the stage, while the body paragraphs are well-structured, each containing a topic sentence that introduces the main idea. The conclusion succinctly wraps up the discussion, reiterating the writer’s stance.
    • How to improve: While the paragraphing is generally effective, ensuring that each paragraph contains a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details can enhance clarity. For instance, the first body paragraph could benefit from a more explicit topic sentence that directly states the argument for salary caps before delving into supporting examples. This would help reinforce the main idea of each paragraph.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "On one hand," "Conversely," and "In conclusion," which help to connect ideas and guide the reader through the argument. Additionally, the use of phrases like "for instance" and "furthermore" effectively links examples to the points being made, enhancing the overall coherence of the essay.
    • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases. For example, using alternatives to "however" such as "nevertheless" or "on the contrary" can add variety. Additionally, employing more complex cohesive devices, such as referencing back to previous ideas with phrases like "this notion" or "such a perspective," can further enhance the flow of the essay.

Overall, the essay effectively meets the criteria for coherence and cohesion, demonstrating a strong organization of ideas, effective paragraphing, and a good range of cohesive devices. By implementing the suggested improvements, the writer can elevate the clarity and sophistication of their writing even further.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 8

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of vocabulary, employing terms such as "socioeconomic stratum," "financial strain," and "upward mobility." These choices reflect an ability to articulate complex ideas effectively. Additionally, phrases like "capping salaries" and "wealth gap" are used appropriately, showcasing the writer’s familiarity with the topic’s terminology.
    • How to improve: To further enhance lexical variety, the writer could incorporate more synonyms or related terms to avoid repetition. For example, instead of repeatedly using "individuals," alternatives like "persons," "workers," or "citizens" could be utilized. This would not only diversify the vocabulary but also maintain reader engagement.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally employs vocabulary with precision. Terms like "affluent" and "superior educational and healthcare resources" are used accurately to convey specific meanings. However, the phrase "a culture of complacency" could be interpreted in various ways, potentially leading to ambiguity regarding the intended message.
    • How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should clarify phrases that may be vague or open to interpretation. For instance, instead of "a culture of complacency," the writer could specify what aspects of complacency are being referred to, perhaps by stating "a culture that discourages ambition and innovation." This would enhance clarity and ensure that the reader fully grasps the argument being made.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors present. Words such as "exceptionally," "contribute," and "inequality" are spelled correctly, reflecting the writer’s attention to detail and proficiency in English.
    • How to improve: To maintain this level of spelling accuracy, the writer should continue to proofread their work carefully. Additionally, practicing spelling through exercises or utilizing spelling-check tools can further reinforce this skill. Engaging with vocabulary lists related to common IELTS topics may also help solidify correct spelling in context.

Overall, the essay effectively meets the criteria for a Band 8 in Lexical Resource, with strengths in vocabulary range and spelling accuracy. By focusing on enhancing precision and diversifying vocabulary, the writer can aim for an even higher score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. For instance, complex sentences such as "High earners often inhabit a different socioeconomic stratum, which can lead to increased social stratification and inequality" effectively convey nuanced ideas. Additionally, the use of conditional structures, as seen in "If everyone were guaranteed equal earnings regardless of effort or contribution, it could diminish the incentive for hard work," showcases the writer’s ability to express hypothetical scenarios. However, while the range is strong, there are moments where simpler structures could have been employed for clarity, particularly in the introduction.
    • How to improve: To further diversify sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more compound-complex sentences and varied clause placements. For example, starting sentences with adverbial clauses (e.g., "Although salary caps might reduce income inequality, they could also stifle economic growth") can enhance engagement and complexity. Additionally, varying the length of sentences can create a more dynamic rhythm in writing.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits a high level of grammatical accuracy, with few errors. For instance, the use of articles and prepositions is mostly correct, as seen in "a small percentage of individuals" and "to impose salary caps." Punctuation is also well-managed, with appropriate use of commas to separate clauses, such as in "which can lead to increased social stratification and inequality." However, there are minor issues with punctuation that could be improved, such as the potential overuse of commas in some sentences, which can disrupt the flow.
    • How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, the writer should review complex sentences to ensure that punctuation does not hinder readability. For example, simplifying some sentences by breaking them into two could improve clarity. Additionally, practicing the rules for comma usage, particularly in complex sentences, can help avoid unnecessary pauses that may confuse the reader. Regularly reviewing grammar rules and seeking feedback on sentence structure can also contribute to ongoing improvement.

Overall, the essay is well-structured and demonstrates a strong command of grammatical range and accuracy, meriting a band score of 8. By focusing on diversifying sentence structures and refining punctuation usage, the writer can aim for even greater clarity and sophistication in their writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

In many nations, a small percentage of individuals command exceptionally high salaries, prompting a debate about whether this phenomenon is beneficial for the country or if it requires governmental intervention to impose salary limits. This essay will explore both perspectives, ultimately supporting the notion that individuals should be allowed to earn unlimited incomes based on their capabilities and contributions.

On one side, some argue that governments should impose limits on salaries to address the widening wealth gap within society. High earners often inhabit a different socioeconomic stratum, which can lead to increased social stratification and inequality. For instance, affluent individuals generally have access to superior educational and healthcare facilities, allowing them to improve their living conditions over time. In contrast, those with lower incomes may struggle to meet basic needs, resulting in financial hardship and restricted opportunities for upward mobility. While capping salaries could potentially reduce these disparities, it might also enhance ambition and innovation among the population, ultimately hindering economic growth and fostering a culture of complacency.

Conversely, I contend that permitting individuals to earn without restrictions can significantly boost a country’s economy. The pursuit of higher earnings frequently motivates individuals to work more diligently and increase their productivity, which can lead to overall economic advancement. Furthermore, as individuals accumulate wealth, they contribute more in taxes, enabling governments to invest in essential public services such as education and healthcare. This investment not only improves the quality of life for all citizens but also creates an environment conducive to further economic development. If everyone were assured equal earnings regardless of effort or contribution, it could reduce the incentive for diligent work and innovation necessary for national progress.

In conclusion, while imposing salary limits might help mitigate income disparities among citizens, allowing individuals the freedom to earn as much as they can will substantially boost the economy and foster a culture of productivity. Therefore, I believe that unrestricted earning potential is ultimately beneficial for society as a whole.

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