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In numerous nations, there is a growing trend for individuals to frequently discuss financial matters, such as their earnings or expenditures, in everyday conversation. What are the reasons, is it trend positive or negative

In numerous nations, there is a growing trend for individuals to frequently discuss financial matters, such as their earnings or expenditures, in everyday conversation. What are the reasons, is it trend positive or negative

In today’s society, it is becoming increasingly common for teenagers to engage in discussions about financial issues in daily conversation. This essay will explore several underlying factors behind this prevalent tendency before assessing whether it is a negative or positive trend.
There are some compelling arguments that explain why young individuals frequently discuss money-related matters. To begin with, the rising cost of living has made the topic of finances become more commonplace. In this day and age, due to the modernization of our lifestyles coupled with the relentless surge in inflation, daily living costs are skyrocketing at an unprecedented rate, placing a heavy burden on many households. As individuals are prevented from accessing top-notch medical care, pursuing various educational options and purchasing high quality products, they become more concerned about how to manage money effectively to navigate daily financial difficulties. Consequently, this necessity prompts conversations about budgeting hacks, saving strategies and cost-cutting measures, making those discussions more mainstream . Another major cause is the prevalence of social media. Platforms such as Instagram, Tiktok, and Facebook have revolutionized the way people engage with financial aspects. Influencers and content creators often share personal finance tips, investment strategies and budgeting advice, making financial discussions more relatable and accessible to young audiences, thus inspiring them to discuss their financial experiences with peers and seek collective solutions to common challenges.
Nevertheless, I still believe that engaging in discussions about finances brings merits to individuals. The most significant advantage associated with this trend is increased financial literacy. As young people are equipped with essential knowledge about finances through daily conversations, they can successfully address money-related challenges and make informed decisions regarding budgeting and investing. Additionally, sharing financial hardships fosters sympathy and supportive relationships where people help each other overcome economic challenges. This exchange of advice not only cements relationships but also enables individuals to discover effective ways of handling their budgetary situations, ultimately building a community where individuals feel less isolated in their challenges and more encouraged to address them.
In conclusion, people’s frequent discussions about finances stem from the challenges posed by rising living costs and the influence of social platforms. This trend not only heightens financial awareness but also fosters supportive networks; therefore, it plays a pivotal role in promoting better financial habits and creating an inclusive environment.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "In today’s society" -> "In contemporary society"
    Explanation: "Contemporary" is a more precise and formal term than "today’s," which is somewhat colloquial and vague in this context.

  2. "it is becoming increasingly common" -> "it has become increasingly prevalent"
    Explanation: "Has become increasingly prevalent" is a more formal and precise way to describe a trend that has developed over time.

  3. "young individuals" -> "young people"
    Explanation: "Young people" is a more natural and commonly used term in academic writing than "young individuals."

  4. "the topic of finances become more commonplace" -> "financial discussions have become more common"
    Explanation: "Financial discussions have become more common" is grammatically correct and clearer than the original phrase.

  5. "In this day and age" -> "in the current era"
    Explanation: "In the current era" is a more formal and precise expression than "in this day and age," which can sound overly colloquial.

  6. "skyrocketing at an unprecedented rate" -> "increasing at an unprecedented rate"
    Explanation: "Increasing" is more accurate and less dramatic than "skyrocketing," which may be seen as overly sensational for academic writing.

  7. "placing a heavy burden" -> "imposing significant burdens"
    Explanation: "Imposing significant burdens" is more formal and precise than "placing a heavy burden," which is somewhat colloquial.

  8. "top-notch medical care" -> "high-quality medical care"
    Explanation: "High-quality" is a more formal and academically appropriate term than "top-notch," which is informal and colloquial.

  9. "purchasing high quality products" -> "acquiring high-quality products"
    Explanation: "Acquiring" is a more formal verb choice than "purchasing" in this context, aligning better with academic style.

  10. "budgeting hacks" -> "budgeting strategies"
    Explanation: "Budgeting strategies" is a more formal and precise term than "budgeting hacks," which is colloquial and informal.

  11. "making financial discussions more relatable" -> "rendering financial discussions more relatable"
    Explanation: "Rendering" is a more formal verb choice than "making," enhancing the academic tone of the sentence.

  12. "increased financial literacy" -> "enhanced financial literacy"
    Explanation: "Enhanced" suggests a more significant improvement than "increased," which is somewhat vague and less formal.

  13. "sharing financial hardships" -> "discussing financial challenges"
    Explanation: "Discussing financial challenges" is a clearer and more formal way to describe the sharing of financial difficulties.

  14. "fosters sympathy and supportive relationships" -> "promotes empathy and fosters supportive relationships"
    Explanation: "Promotes empathy" is more precise and formal than "fosters sympathy," which is less commonly used in academic writing.

  15. "feel less isolated in their challenges" -> "experience less isolation in their challenges"
    Explanation: "Experience less isolation" is a more formal and precise way to express the feeling of being less isolated.

  16. "plays a pivotal role" -> "plays a crucial role"
    Explanation: "Crucial" is a more formal and academically appropriate adjective than "pivotal" in this context, emphasizing the importance of the role.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt. It identifies reasons for the trend of discussing financial matters, such as the rising cost of living and the influence of social media. Furthermore, it evaluates the trend as positive, highlighting benefits like increased financial literacy and supportive relationships. The structure is clear, with a logical flow from reasons to evaluation, which supports a comprehensive response.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the essay could include more specific examples or statistics related to the rising cost of living or the impact of social media on financial discussions. This would provide a more robust foundation for the claims made and demonstrate a deeper engagement with the topic.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that the trend of discussing finances is positive. This stance is consistently supported throughout the essay, particularly in the second half where the advantages are discussed. The use of phrases like "I still believe" reinforces the author’s viewpoint effectively.
    • How to improve: While the position is clear, the essay could benefit from a more explicit acknowledgment of potential counterarguments. Briefly addressing the negative aspects of discussing finances could strengthen the argument by demonstrating a balanced perspective, ultimately reinforcing the author’s position.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: Ideas are well-presented and supported with relevant explanations. The essay discusses the reasons for the trend in detail, providing a solid basis for the claims. The advantages of financial discussions are also elaborated upon, with clear connections made between increased literacy and supportive relationships.
    • How to improve: To further extend ideas, the author could incorporate more varied examples or anecdotes that illustrate the points made. For instance, sharing a specific scenario where financial discussions led to improved budgeting practices could add depth and relatability to the argument.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic throughout, addressing both the reasons for the trend and its implications. There are no significant deviations from the prompt, and each paragraph contributes to the overall argument.
    • How to improve: To ensure continued focus, the author should be mindful of avoiding overly broad statements. For example, while discussing social media, the essay could specify how different platforms uniquely contribute to financial discussions, thereby maintaining a tighter focus on the topic.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the prompt and presents a well-structured argument. By incorporating more specific examples, acknowledging counterarguments, and extending ideas further, the essay could achieve an even higher level of sophistication and engagement with the topic.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear and logical progression of ideas. The introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion by outlining the main points that will be explored. Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the topic, starting with reasons for the trend and moving on to its implications. For example, the first body paragraph discusses the rising cost of living, while the second focuses on the influence of social media. This structure allows readers to follow the argument easily.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using more explicit signposting within paragraphs. For instance, phrases like "Firstly," "Secondly," and "In addition" can help guide the reader through the argument. Additionally, ensuring that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence can further clarify the main idea being discussed.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively utilizes paragraphs to separate distinct ideas, which aids in readability. Each paragraph is focused and develops a single idea, contributing to the overall coherence of the essay. The conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points, reinforcing the argument presented.
    • How to improve: While the paragraphing is generally effective, consider varying the length and complexity of sentences within paragraphs to enhance engagement. For example, breaking up longer sentences with shorter, impactful statements can create a more dynamic reading experience. Additionally, ensuring that the final paragraph not only summarizes but also reflects on the implications of the discussion could provide a stronger closure.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "to begin with," "consequently," and "nevertheless," which help to connect ideas and maintain the flow of the argument. These devices effectively guide the reader through the essay and clarify relationships between points.
    • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking phrases and transitions. For example, using phrases like "on the other hand," "in contrast," or "furthermore" can add depth to the connections made between ideas. Additionally, varying the placement of cohesive devices can enhance the overall rhythm of the writing, making it more engaging.

Overall, the essay is well-structured and coherent, demonstrating a strong command of coherence and cohesion principles. By implementing the suggested improvements, the writer can further elevate the clarity and impact of their argument.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 8

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of vocabulary, effectively conveying complex ideas. Phrases like "financial issues," "cost-cutting measures," and "budgeting hacks" showcase the writer’s ability to employ topic-specific language. Additionally, the use of terms such as "prevalent tendency" and "relentless surge in inflation" reflects a strong command of vocabulary that enhances the clarity and sophistication of the argument.
    • How to improve: To further elevate the lexical resource, the writer could incorporate more varied synonyms and expressions. For instance, instead of repeating "financial discussions," alternatives like "monetary conversations" or "economic dialogues" could be used. Additionally, exploring idiomatic expressions or collocations related to finance could enrich the essay’s vocabulary even more.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally employs vocabulary with precision, effectively conveying the intended meanings. However, there are instances where word choice could be refined. For example, the phrase "top-notch medical care" may come across as slightly informal for an academic essay. Additionally, "making those discussions more mainstream" could be interpreted as vague; a more precise term like "ubiquitous" could enhance clarity.
    • How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should consider the context and formality of the vocabulary used. Replacing informal phrases with more academic alternatives can strengthen the overall tone. For instance, instead of "high quality products," using "premium goods" or "superior products" would convey a more formal tone.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors. Words like "expenditures," "burden," and "community" are spelled correctly, contributing to the overall professionalism of the writing.
    • How to improve: While spelling is accurate, the writer should maintain this standard by consistently proofreading their work. Engaging in regular spelling exercises or utilizing tools like spell-check can help reinforce this skill. Additionally, familiarizing oneself with commonly misspelled words in academic writing can further enhance spelling accuracy.

In summary, the essay demonstrates a strong command of lexical resource, with effective vocabulary usage and spelling accuracy. To achieve an even higher score, the writer should focus on diversifying vocabulary, enhancing precision, and maintaining spelling accuracy through consistent practice.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. For instance, complex sentences such as "As individuals are prevented from accessing top-notch medical care, pursuing various educational options and purchasing high quality products, they become more concerned about how to manage money effectively to navigate daily financial difficulties" showcase the ability to convey intricate ideas. Additionally, the use of conditional structures, such as "if individuals feel less isolated in their challenges," adds depth to the argument. However, there is a tendency to rely on longer, more complex sentences, which can occasionally affect clarity.
    • How to improve: To enhance the variety of structures, consider incorporating more simple and compound sentences alongside the complex ones. This will not only improve readability but also emphasize key points. For example, breaking down some of the longer sentences into shorter ones can help maintain the reader’s engagement and ensure clarity.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits a high level of grammatical accuracy, with only minor errors. For instance, the phrase "making those discussions more mainstream ." contains an unnecessary space before the period, which detracts from the overall professionalism of the writing. Additionally, the use of commas is mostly effective, although there are instances where additional commas could enhance clarity, such as in the list "budgeting hacks, saving strategies and cost-cutting measures," where a comma before "and" (Oxford comma) could be added for consistency.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, a careful proofreading process is essential. Pay attention to punctuation, especially in complex sentences, to ensure that clauses are clearly separated. Additionally, reviewing the rules for comma usage, particularly in lists and before conjunctions, can help refine the essay further. Regular practice with grammar exercises and seeking feedback from peers can also aid in identifying and correcting persistent errors.

In summary, the essay demonstrates a strong command of grammatical range and accuracy, meriting a band score of 8. By diversifying sentence structures and refining grammatical precision, the writer can further enhance their writing quality.

Bài sửa mẫu

In contemporary society, it has become increasingly prevalent for teenagers to engage in discussions about financial issues in daily conversation. This essay will explore several underlying factors behind this trend before assessing whether it is positive or negative.

There are compelling arguments that explain why young individuals frequently discuss money-related matters. To begin with, the rising cost of living has made the topic of finances more commonplace. In the current era, due to the modernization of our lifestyles coupled with the relentless surge in inflation, daily living costs are increasing at an unprecedented rate, imposing significant burdens on many households. As individuals find it challenging to access high-quality medical care, pursue various educational options, and acquire high-quality products, they become more concerned about how to manage money effectively to navigate daily financial difficulties. Consequently, this necessity prompts conversations about budgeting strategies, saving tactics, and cost-cutting measures, rendering those discussions more mainstream.

Another major cause is the prevalence of social media. Platforms such as Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook have revolutionized the way people engage with financial aspects. Influencers and content creators often share personal finance tips, investment strategies, and budgeting advice, making financial discussions more relatable and accessible to young audiences. This, in turn, inspires them to discuss their financial experiences with peers and seek collective solutions to common challenges.

Nevertheless, I believe that engaging in discussions about finances brings significant benefits to individuals. The most notable advantage associated with this trend is enhanced financial literacy. As young people acquire essential knowledge about finances through daily conversations, they can successfully address money-related challenges and make informed decisions regarding budgeting and investing. Additionally, discussing financial challenges promotes empathy and fosters supportive relationships, where individuals help each other overcome economic obstacles. This exchange of advice not only strengthens relationships but also enables individuals to discover effective ways of handling their budgetary situations, ultimately building a community where they feel less isolated in their challenges and more encouraged to address them.

In conclusion, people’s frequent discussions about finances stem from the challenges posed by rising living costs and the influence of social platforms. This trend not only heightens financial awareness but also fosters supportive networks; therefore, it plays a crucial role in promoting better financial habits and creating an inclusive environment.

Bài viết liên quan

Task 2: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects equally, whereas other people think that they should concentrate on only those subjects that they find interesting and they are best at. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Task 2: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects…

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