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In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in.

What are the reasons for this?

How can people research this?

In some nation, more and more people are becoming interested in exploring the history of the house or building they live in. This essay will delve into the reasons behind this phenomenon and examine the methods people use for research.

The drivers behind this phenomenon arise from their natural curiosity and their scareness of spiritual problems. It is not uncommon that many individuals have high sense of curiosity. These arise from their desire to gain more information and knowledge of their living places. On the other hand, being afraid of spiritual phenomenon is a significant reason. Due to the advancements in technologies, internet offers people a vast array of information, including tabloids with false information that scare people with ghost and demons.

There are various methods that people use to explore the history of the house or building where they live in. Firstly, the internet is a pratical and useful tool that provides any kinds of information they acquiring. For example, when individuals acquire to get more information about the house, they can look up for it on the social media such as blogs and forums. Secondly, asking elderly people is a great method. Elderly people can provide various crucial information about the history of the house where they live in or surrounding accomodation due to their deep experiences and knowledge.

In conclusion, the main reasons of why more and more people are becoming interested in the history of their houses are arising from their natural curiosity and their scareness of spiritual phenomenon. Meanwhile, the internet and older people can easily offer information that they acquire, helping them to research.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

  1. "nation" -> "nations"
    Explanation: The word "nation" should be pluralized to "nations" to correctly refer to multiple countries or regions where people are becoming interested in exploring house histories.

  2. "scareness" -> "fear"
    Explanation: "Scareness" is not a standard word; "fear" is a more appropriate and formal term to describe being afraid of spiritual problems.

  3. "high sense of curiosity" -> "strong curiosity"
    Explanation: "High sense of curiosity" is somewhat awkward; "strong curiosity" is a more natural and academically appropriate phrase to express intense interest.

  4. "phenomenon" (repeated) -> "interest"
    Explanation: Repeating the word "phenomenon" can make the writing repetitive. Using "interest" instead provides variety and clarity.

  5. "internet offers people a vast array of information, including tabloids with false information that scare people with ghost and demons" -> "internet provides a wide range of information, including unreliable sources that propagate fear of ghosts and demons"
    Explanation: This revision simplifies the sentence while maintaining clarity and formality. "Tabloids" may not be the most precise term for unreliable online sources, and "scare people with ghost and demons" can be phrased more formally.

  6. "pratical" -> "practical"
    Explanation: "Pratical" is a misspelling; the correct form is "practical."

  7. "acquiring" -> "acquisition"
    Explanation: "Acquiring" is a verb, but "acquisition" functions better here as a noun, providing smoother sentence structure.

  8. "look up for it" -> "look it up"
    Explanation: "Look up for it" is redundant; "look it up" is the correct form.

  9. "surrounding accomodation" -> "surrounding accommodations"
    Explanation: "Accomodation" is misspelled; the correct form is "accommodation," and "surrounding accommodations" is clearer and more precise.

  10. "elderly people is" -> "elderly people are"
    Explanation: "Elderly people" is a plural subject, so it requires the plural verb "are" instead of "is."

  11. "In conclusion, the main reasons of why more and more people are becoming interested in the history of their houses are arising from their natural curiosity and their scareness of spiritual phenomenon." -> "In conclusion, the increasing interest in house history stems primarily from natural curiosity and fear of spiritual phenomena."
    Explanation: This revision simplifies the sentence structure and removes redundancy, resulting in a clearer and more concise conclusion.

  12. "older people" -> "elderly individuals"
    Explanation: "Older people" can be perceived as somewhat informal; "elderly individuals" is a more respectful and academically appropriate term.

  13. "can easily offer information that they acquire" -> "can provide valuable insights"
    Explanation: This revision enhances clarity and formal tone by replacing the vague phrase "information that they acquire" with the more specific "valuable insights."

  14. "helping them to research" -> "facilitating their research"
    Explanation: "Helping them to research" can be refined to "facilitating their research" for a more formal and precise expression.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses both aspects of the prompt. It discusses the reasons for the growing interest in exploring the history of houses, citing curiosity and fear of spiritual phenomena, and it outlines methods for conducting such research, including the use of the internet and consulting elderly individuals.
    • How to improve: While the essay covers all parts of the question, the explanations could be more detailed and nuanced. Providing specific examples or anecdotes related to each reason and research method would enhance the depth of analysis.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position by acknowledging both reasons for the interest in house history and presenting methods for research. However, the clarity could be improved with stronger thesis statements at the beginning of each body paragraph.
    • How to improve: Begin each body paragraph with a clear topic sentence that reinforces the main argument and guides the reader through the subsequent discussion.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas about the reasons for the interest in house history and methods for research, but they are not sufficiently extended or supported. For instance, the discussion on curiosity and fear of spiritual phenomena lacks depth and specific examples.
    • How to improve: Provide more elaborate explanations and support your points with relevant examples, data, or anecdotes. Consider exploring the psychological or societal implications of curiosity and fear in relation to house history.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic by discussing the reasons for the growing interest in house history and methods for researching it. However, there are minor deviations, such as the brief mention of tabloids with false information, which could be omitted or expanded upon to maintain focus.
    • How to improve: Avoid tangential points that do not directly contribute to the discussion. Instead, focus on elaborating on the main ideas and ensuring every detail aligns with the central theme of exploring house history.

Overall, while the essay effectively addresses the prompt’s requirements, there is room for improvement in providing more detailed explanations, reinforcing clarity, extending ideas with supporting evidence, and maintaining strict relevance to the topic. Strengthening these aspects would elevate the essay’s coherence and depth of analysis.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 6

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a basic level of logical organization. It follows a typical introduction-body-conclusion structure, with each paragraph addressing a specific aspect of the essay prompt. For instance, the introduction introduces the topic and outlines the essay’s structure, the body paragraphs discuss reasons for people’s interest in house history and methods of research, and the conclusion summarizes the main points. However, transitions between ideas and paragraphs could be smoother to enhance overall coherence.
    • How to improve: To improve logical organization, focus on developing clear topic sentences for each paragraph that directly relate to the main idea. Use transition words and phrases (e.g., firstly, secondly, in conclusion, on the other hand) to guide readers through the essay’s flow and create stronger connections between ideas.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs effectively to separate distinct ideas. Each paragraph addresses a different aspect of the topic, such as reasons for interest in house history or methods of research. However, some paragraphs could benefit from further development to fully explore their respective points. For instance, the second body paragraph briefly mentions curiosity and fear of spiritual phenomena without delving deeply into these concepts.
    • How to improve: Strengthen paragraph development by providing specific examples, explanations, or evidence to support each main point. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding sentence to reinforce the paragraph’s significance.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay uses some cohesive devices, such as transition words (e.g., Firstly, Secondly, In conclusion) and pronouns (e.g., their, they) to connect ideas within and between sentences. However, the use of cohesive devices could be more varied and sophisticated to improve coherence and cohesion further. Additionally, more cohesive devices could be used to show relationships between ideas, such as cause-effect or comparison.
    • How to improve: Expand the use of cohesive devices beyond basic transitions to include a wider range of connectors (e.g., furthermore, nevertheless, consequently) and cohesive devices (e.g., pronouns, demonstratives, conjunctions). Use these devices to create a clear flow of ideas and demonstrate logical connections between sentences and paragraphs.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a sufficient level of coherence and cohesion for a Band 6 score, enhancing logical organization, paragraph development, and the use of varied cohesive devices can elevate the essay’s clarity and coherence, leading to a more cohesive and persuasive argument.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of vocabulary. There is an attempt to use varied vocabulary, but some repetition and basic language limit the richness of expression. For instance, phrases like "more and more people," "natural curiosity," and "spiritual problems" are adequately employed but lack depth and sophistication. While there are some instances of more advanced vocabulary, such as "phenomenon" and "acquire," they are not consistently used throughout the essay.
    • How to improve: To enhance lexical resource, diversify word choice by incorporating synonyms and more precise terms. For example, instead of repeatedly using "more and more people," consider alternatives like "an increasing number of individuals" or "a growing segment of the population." Additionally, strive for greater nuance in expressing concepts like curiosity and spiritual concerns. Expanding the vocabulary arsenal through extensive reading and actively noting synonyms would facilitate this improvement.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay occasionally employs vocabulary with precision, such as "tabloids" and "phenomenon." However, there are instances of imprecise usage, such as "scareness" instead of "fear" or "apprehension," and "pratical" instead of "practical." These inaccuracies detract from the clarity and effectiveness of communication.
    • How to improve: To enhance precision in vocabulary usage, pay close attention to word choice and ensure that each term accurately conveys the intended meaning. Proofreading and consulting a dictionary or thesaurus can help identify and rectify imprecise language. Additionally, practicing writing exercises focused on using specific vocabulary in context can refine precision over time.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: Spelling accuracy in the essay is inconsistent. While some words are spelled correctly, there are several instances of misspellings, such as "scareness" instead of "scariness," "pratical" instead of "practical," and "accomodation" instead of "accommodation." These errors detract from the professionalism and readability of the essay.
    • How to improve: Improving spelling accuracy requires attention to detail and regular practice. Utilize spelling and grammar checkers, proofread carefully, and consider creating a personal list of commonly misspelled words for reference. Additionally, reading extensively and paying attention to spelling patterns can reinforce correct spelling habits. Investing time in systematic spelling drills and seeking feedback on written work can further enhance spelling skills.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:
    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate variety of sentence structures. It includes simple, compound, and complex sentences. However, there is room for improvement in incorporating more sophisticated structures such as conditional sentences, passive voice, and complex noun phrases. For instance, while the essay uses some complex sentences like "It is not uncommon that many individuals have high sense of curiosity," there is a lack of diversity in sentence patterns throughout the essay.
    • How to improve: To enhance grammatical range, consider incorporating a wider variety of sentence structures. Experiment with using conditional sentences to express hypothetical situations ("If people were more aware of their surroundings, they might feel inclined to explore the history of their homes"). Additionally, utilize passive voice constructions to vary sentence structure ("Various methods are employed by people to explore the history of their residences"). Finally, aim to construct complex noun phrases to add depth and sophistication to your writing ("The exploration of historical narratives pertaining to one’s dwelling place can be a rewarding endeavor").
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable level of grammatical accuracy overall. However, there are several instances of grammatical errors and punctuation mistakes throughout the text. For example, "scareness" should be "fear" or "concern," and "acquiring" should be "acquire." Additionally, there are punctuation errors such as missing commas and incorrect capitalization.
    • How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, it’s important to review and revise your writing carefully. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and correct word usage. Proofread your essay thoroughly to catch any punctuation errors and ensure proper capitalization. Consider utilizing grammar-checking tools or seeking feedback from peers or tutors to identify and correct errors more effectively. Additionally, focus on learning the rules of punctuation and practice applying them consistently in your writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

“In some nations, more and more people are becoming interested in exploring the history of the house or building they live in. This essay will delve into the reasons behind this phenomenon and examine the methods people use for research.

The drivers behind this phenomenon arise from their natural curiosity and their fear of spiritual phenomena. It is not uncommon that many individuals have a strong curiosity. These arise from their desire to gain more information and knowledge about their living places. On the other hand, fear of spiritual phenomena is a significant reason. Due to advancements in technology, the internet provides a wide range of information, including unreliable sources that propagate fear of ghosts and demons.

There are various methods that people use to explore the history of the house or building where they live. Firstly, the internet is a practical and useful tool that provides any kind of information they are seeking. For example, when individuals want to get more information about the house, they can look it up on social media such as blogs and forums. Secondly, asking elderly individuals is a great method. Elderly people can provide various crucial insights about the history of the house where they live or surrounding accommodations due to their deep experiences and knowledge.

In conclusion, the main reasons why more and more people are becoming interested in the history of their houses stem primarily from their natural curiosity and fear of spiritual phenomena. Meanwhile, the internet and elderly individuals can easily offer the information they seek, facilitating their research.”

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