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Many students find it harder to study when they are at university or college than when they were at school. Why is this? What can be done to solve the problem?

Many students find it harder to study when they are at university or college than when they were at school. Why is this? What can be done to solve the problem?

Many students encounter more difficulties embarking on academic journeys at university and college than they did in school. This essay will examine underlying factors contributing to this phenomenon and propose several measures to mitigate this issue
Admittedly, there are a number of reasons leading to this phenomenon. First and foremost, as the complexity of academic content rises significantly. Students at the university or college level have to engage with a wide variety of intricate and in – depth understandings. This necessitates analytical, problem – solving, and synthesis skills, thereby posing challenges to gaining profound knowledge and creating an elevated learning environment, which results in diminished academic performance and motivation. Furthermore, there is a greater demand for autonomy and time management skills. Students at the university or college level are often required to organize their own schedules and stay focused on their work. This necessitates the enhancement of self – management skills, including maintaining consistent work habits and sustaining a proactive learning attitude that may not always be cultivated in high school.
Schools can organize comprehensive orientation programs training sessions for students, focusing on setting realistic academic goals as well as developing inference skills. Simultaneously, providing easily comprehensible learning lectures enables students to get exposed to understanding more effectively.To support students, schools can carry out educational programs teaching time – management and self-directed learning. This means providing them how to schedule, enhance task prioritization, and cultivate personalized interactions with their curriculum. This helps students to feel more confident and proactive in their learning journey


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Errors and Improvements:

  1. "Many students encounter more difficulties embarking on academic journeys at university and college than they did in school." -> "Numerous students face greater challenges when commencing their academic journeys at university and college compared to their experiences in school."
    Explanation: The revised sentence maintains formality while using more precise language. "Encounter more difficulties" is replaced with "face greater challenges," and "embarking on academic journeys" is refined to "commencing their academic journeys."

  2. "This essay will examine underlying factors contributing to this phenomenon and propose several measures to mitigate this issue." -> "This essay will explore the underlying factors contributing to this phenomenon and propose several measures to alleviate the challenges."
    Explanation: The term "examine" is substituted with "explore" for a more academic and nuanced tone. Additionally, "mitigate this issue" is replaced with "alleviate the challenges" for improved specificity and formality.

  3. "First and foremost, as the complexity of academic content rises significantly." -> "Primarily, due to the substantial increase in the complexity of academic content."
    Explanation: The phrase "first and foremost" is replaced with "primarily" for a more formal tone. The sentence is rephrased to enhance clarity and precision.

  4. "Students at the university or college level have to engage with a wide variety of intricate and in-depth understandings." -> "University or college-level students are required to grapple with a diverse array of intricate and in-depth concepts."
    Explanation: The sentence is revised for conciseness and formality. "Engage with" is replaced with "grapple with," and "understandings" is substituted with "concepts" for clarity and precision.

  5. "This necessitates analytical, problem-solving, and synthesis skills, thereby posing challenges to gaining profound knowledge and creating an elevated learning environment, which results in diminished academic performance and motivation." -> "This necessitates the development of analytical, problem-solving, and synthesis skills, posing challenges to acquiring profound knowledge and fostering an enriched learning environment, consequently leading to reduced academic performance and motivation."
    Explanation: The sentence is restructured for clarity and precision. The use of more specific terms like "acquiring" and "fostering" contributes to a more academic style.

  6. "Furthermore, there is a greater demand for autonomy and time management skills." -> "Moreover, there is an increased demand for autonomy and proficiency in time management."
    Explanation: "Furthermore" is replaced with "Moreover" for a more formal transition. "Greater demand" is modified to "increased demand," and "time management skills" is refined to "proficiency in time management" for precision.

  7. "Schools can organize comprehensive orientation programs training sessions for students, focusing on setting realistic academic goals as well as developing inference skills." -> "Educational institutions can arrange comprehensive orientation programs and training sessions for students, emphasizing the establishment of realistic academic goals and the cultivation of inference skills."
    Explanation: The term "schools" is broadened to "educational institutions" for inclusivity. The sentence is rephrased for formality and clarity, using more precise language.

  8. "Simultaneously, providing easily comprehensible learning lectures enables students to get exposed to understanding more effectively." -> "Concurrently, delivering easily comprehensible lectures facilitates students in gaining a more effective understanding."
    Explanation: "Simultaneously" is replaced with "concurrently" for formality. The phrase "get exposed to understanding" is refined to "facilitates students in gaining a more effective understanding" for precision and academic tone.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both components of the prompt. It discusses the reasons behind students finding it harder to study at university compared to school and suggests measures to solve the problem. Relevant sections are cited to support this observation, such as the explanation of the complexity of academic content and the demand for autonomy and time management skills.

    • How to improve: To enhance comprehensiveness, consider providing more examples or elaborating further on each point. For instance, expanding on specific challenges posed by intricate academic content or delving deeper into the autonomy and time management skills required could strengthen the response.

  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear and consistent stance throughout. It acknowledges the increased complexity of academic content and the demand for autonomy and time management skills as key factors contributing to the challenges faced by students at university. This is evident in phrases like "Admittedly, there are a number of reasons" and "Furthermore, there is a greater demand."

    • How to improve: The clarity of the position is strong, but to further enhance consistency, ensure that each paragraph ties back explicitly to the thesis statement. This can be achieved by reiterating the main points and emphasizing their connection to the overall argument.

  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively presents, extends, and supports ideas. For instance, the complexity of academic content is well-explained, and supporting evidence is provided by discussing analytical, problem-solving, and synthesis skills. The need for autonomy and time management skills is also supported by detailing the organizational challenges students face.

    • How to improve: To further enhance this aspect, consider incorporating real-life examples or case studies to illustrate the challenges faced by students and the effectiveness of the proposed solutions. This can add depth to the argument and make it more convincing.

  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic by addressing the difficulties students face in university compared to school and proposing solutions. However, there is a brief mention of schools organizing orientation programs, which might be slightly off-topic as the focus is on university and college.

    • How to improve: While the orientation programs are a relevant solution, it would be beneficial to tie this point back explicitly to the university context. For example, specifying how universities can implement orientation programs tailored to the unique challenges faced by students in higher education would strengthen the connection to the prompt.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong grasp of the task and effectively addresses the prompt. To improve further, consider incorporating more examples and ensuring that each paragraph reinforces the main thesis. Additionally, tying all proposed solutions explicitly to the university context will enhance the overall relevance and coherence of the essay.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 6

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of information. The introduction introduces the topic and the essay’s purpose clearly. The body paragraphs address different aspects of the issue, discussing reasons for the difficulties and proposing solutions. However, the flow could be improved by connecting ideas more explicitly. For instance, a smoother transition between the challenges faced at university and the proposed solutions could enhance coherence.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using transitional phrases or sentences to guide the reader through the essay. Ensure that each paragraph logically follows the previous one, creating a seamless flow of ideas. Additionally, explicitly connect the challenges presented with the proposed solutions to strengthen the overall coherence.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay employs paragraphs effectively, with clear separation of ideas. Each paragraph addresses a specific point, and the overall structure is coherent. However, there is room for improvement in the development of ideas within paragraphs. Some points, such as the challenges of university-level learning, could be explored in greater detail to provide a more comprehensive analysis.
    • How to improve: While maintaining clear paragraph structure, strive for depth in each paragraph. Expand on key points with examples or elaborations to offer a more thorough analysis. This will contribute to a richer and more nuanced discussion, improving the overall quality of the essay.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay incorporates cohesive devices, such as transitions (e.g., "Admittedly," and "Furthermore"), pronouns ("this," "there," "it"), and parallel structure (e.g., "analytical, problem-solving, and synthesis skills"). However, there is a limited variety in the types of cohesive devices used. Additionally, some transitions could be more explicit to strengthen the overall coherence.
    • How to improve: Diversify the use of cohesive devices to include a range of connectors (e.g., "however," "moreover") and pronouns for smoother transitions between ideas. Ensure that the relationship between sentences and paragraphs is clear to the reader. Consistently applying a variety of cohesive devices will enhance the essay’s overall coherence and cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable effort to incorporate a diverse range of vocabulary. Various terms, such as "intricate," "profound knowledge," "autonomy," and "self-management skills," contribute to a reasonably broad lexical repertoire. However, there is room for improvement in expanding the use of vocabulary further, especially in certain areas where repetition occurs.
    • How to improve: To enhance the score in this aspect, consider introducing more specialized vocabulary related to academic challenges and solutions. For instance, in the analysis of academic content complexity, incorporate discipline-specific terms to showcase a deeper understanding. Additionally, aim for variety in expressing concepts; for instance, instead of consistently using "challenges," explore synonyms like "obstacles" or "hurdles."
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The precision of vocabulary usage in the essay is generally adequate. However, there are instances where the wording could be more precise. For example, the phrase "diminished academic performance and motivation" could benefit from a more nuanced description, specifying the exact nature of the impact on performance and motivation.
    • How to improve: To enhance precision, aim for clarity and specificity in expressing ideas. Instead of using broad terms, provide detailed examples or employ more specific adjectives to convey the intended meaning. For instance, instead of "diminished," consider terms like "hampered" or "compromised" to offer a clearer picture of the challenges faced by students.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The spelling accuracy in the essay is generally satisfactory. However, there are a few instances of minor spelling errors, such as "in – depth" (hyphen inconsistency) and "self – management" (hyphen inconsistency). These do not significantly impede comprehension but can be refined for a more polished presentation.
    • How to improve: To improve spelling consistency, carefully review the use of hyphens and other punctuation marks. Ensure consistency in hyphenation throughout the essay. Consider utilizing writing tools or proofreading techniques to catch and correct such minor errors before finalizing the essay. Additionally, paying attention to detail during the revision process can contribute to overall spelling accuracy.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay displays a reasonably diverse range of sentence structures. There is an attempt to vary sentence lengths and structures, including complex sentences. However, there is room for improvement in achieving a more seamless integration of different structures. For instance, the repeated use of the phrase "at the university or college level" could be varied to enhance fluency.
    • How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range, consider introducing more complex sentence structures, such as the use of relative clauses, conditional sentences, or varied introductory phrases. Additionally, focus on transitioning between different sentence structures more smoothly to create a more cohesive flow.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates generally accurate grammar and punctuation. However, there are some instances of minor errors, such as the inconsistent use of spaces after hyphens, as seen in "in – depth" and "self – management." Additionally, there are a few instances where articles are missing or incorrectly used, affecting the overall clarity.
    • How to improve: Pay close attention to punctuation consistency, particularly regarding spaces around hyphens. Review and edit for article usage, ensuring that articles (a, an, the) are appropriately placed to improve precision and coherence. Careful proofreading can help eliminate these minor errors and contribute to a polished and more refined essay.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical structures, but refinements in sentence variety and meticulous attention to punctuation and article usage can elevate the essay’s grammatical range and accuracy further.

Bài sửa mẫu

Many students encounter greater challenges when embarking on their academic journeys at university and college compared to their experiences in school. This essay will explore the underlying factors contributing to this phenomenon and propose several measures to alleviate the challenges.

Primarily, the substantial increase in the complexity of academic content is a key factor. University or college-level students are required to grapple with a diverse array of intricate and in-depth concepts. This necessitates the development of analytical, problem-solving, and synthesis skills, posing challenges to acquiring profound knowledge and fostering an enriched learning environment, consequently leading to reduced academic performance and motivation.

Moreover, there is an increased demand for autonomy and proficiency in time management at the higher education level. Students are often required to organize their own schedules and stay focused on their work, enhancing self-management skills such as maintaining consistent work habits and sustaining a proactive learning attitude that may not always be cultivated in high school.

Educational institutions can play a vital role in addressing these challenges by arranging comprehensive orientation programs and training sessions for students. These programs should emphasize the establishment of realistic academic goals and the cultivation of inference skills. Simultaneously, delivering easily comprehensible lectures facilitates students in gaining a more effective understanding.

To further support students, schools can implement educational programs that teach time management and self-directed learning. This involves providing guidance on how to schedule, enhance task prioritization, and cultivate personalized interactions with their curriculum. These measures help students feel more confident and proactive in their learning journey.

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