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Nowadays in many countries household waste e.g. food packaging is increasing day by day. What are the causes for that? How can this problem be solved?

Nowadays in many countries household waste e.g. food packaging is increasing day by day. What are the causes for that? How can this problem be solved?

It is true that these days are witnessing a daily skyrocketing increase in domestic waste disposal, namely food containers, in many corners of the world. I believe that consumer culture is the main reason behind this phenomenon while collective efforts could be taken to tackle this issue.

The two main factors responsible for this excessive throw-away are contemporary consumerism and takeaway preference. Regarding the former, in today's world, people are bombarded with tempting commercials that encourage them to constantly purchase new items instead of reusing the old ones or getting the existing ones repaired. Such a throw-away habit can give rise to excessive disposal, be it dated electronic gadgets and empty bottles that previously contained beverages. Furthermore, due to the current fast-paced life and hectic schedule, people are always pressed for time, leaving little time for meal preparation. Takeaway food, ideally, suits this modern lifestyle, leading to the unprecedented outbreak in the demand for food packaging. However, the majority of these food packages are made of plastic – a non-degradable material, which means that this waste does not only increasingly appear, but also hardly disappears over time, generating cumulative household plastic waste.

Various approaches, nevertheless, can be suggested by the authorities and non-governmental organizations to reduce domestic disposal. The first feasible solution to start with is for the governments to implement policies to restrict the amount of domestic waste. This can be achieved by regulating how many tonnes of disposed substances are allowed weekly and by levying corresponding monetary fines on violations in accordance with their severity and thus, necessitating people striking a balance between purchasing and disposing. As far as commercial corporations' role is concerned, they should manufacture either cyclable or biodegradable food containers to alleviate cumulative plastic waste. The effectiveness of this approach can be seen in Germany, which has recently introduced novel leaf-based containers. As a result, a notable decrease of 21% in domestic waste was seen in the latest year recorded.

To conclude, the unprecedented rise in household disposal basically stems from people's contemporary lifestyles. However, by taking collective action, this adverse phenomenon could be repelled.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "It is true that these days are witnessing a daily skyrocketing increase" -> "It is evident that there is a daily escalating increase"
    Explanation: The phrase "these days are witnessing" is somewhat informal and vague. "It is evident that there is a daily escalating increase" is more precise and formal, fitting the academic style better.

  2. "namely food containers" -> "specifically food packaging"
    Explanation: "namely" is somewhat informal and can be replaced with "specifically" to enhance formality. "Food packaging" is a more precise term than "food containers."

  3. "I believe that consumer culture is the main reason" -> "It is argued that consumer culture is the primary cause"
    Explanation: "I believe" is too personal and informal for academic writing. "It is argued" is more objective and suitable for academic discourse. "Primary cause" is also more formal than "main reason."

  4. "The two main factors responsible for this excessive throw-away" -> "The primary factors contributing to this excessive disposal"
    Explanation: "Throw-away" is an informal term and "excessive disposal" is a more precise and formal expression.

  5. "bombarded with tempting commercials" -> "exposed to enticing advertisements"
    Explanation: "Bombarded" is colloquial and "tempting commercials" is less formal. "Exposed to enticing advertisements" is more precise and formal.

  6. "throw-away habit" -> "disposal habit"
    Explanation: "Throw-away" is informal and imprecise. "Disposal" is the correct term for the context.

  7. "dated electronic gadgets and empty bottles" -> "outdated electronic devices and empty containers"
    Explanation: "Dated" is somewhat informal and "gadgets" is colloquial. "Outdated" and "devices" are more formal and precise.

  8. "ideally, suits this modern lifestyle" -> "is ideally suited to this modern lifestyle"
    Explanation: "Ideally, suits" is awkwardly phrased. "Is ideally suited to" is grammatically correct and more formal.

  9. "unprecedented outbreak in the demand" -> "marked increase in demand"
    Explanation: "Unprecedented outbreak" is an overstatement and "marked increase" is more accurate and less dramatic.

  10. "non-degradable material" -> "non-biodegradable material"
    Explanation: "Non-degradable" is incorrect; "non-biodegradable" is the correct term for materials that do not break down naturally.

  11. "hardly disappears over time" -> "rarely degrades over time"
    Explanation: "Hardly disappears" is informal and imprecise. "Rarely degrades" is more accurate and formal.

  12. "Various approaches, nevertheless, can be suggested" -> "Several strategies, however, could be implemented"
    Explanation: "Various approaches" is vague and "can be suggested" is less assertive. "Several strategies" and "could be implemented" are more specific and assertive.

  13. "regulating how many tonnes of disposed substances are allowed weekly" -> "regulating the weekly disposal of substances"
    Explanation: "How many tonnes of disposed substances are allowed weekly" is awkward and verbose. "The weekly disposal of substances" is more concise and formal.

  14. "corresponding monetary fines on violations" -> "corresponding financial penalties for non-compliance"
    Explanation: "Monetary fines" is somewhat informal and "violations" is less specific. "Financial penalties for non-compliance" is more precise and formal.

  15. "necessitating people striking a balance" -> "requiring individuals to strike a balance"
    Explanation: "Necessitating people" is less formal and "strike a balance" is colloquial. "Requiring individuals to strike a balance" is more formal and precise.

  16. "novel leaf-based containers" -> "innovative leaf-based packaging"
    Explanation: "Novel" is correct but "novel leaf-based containers" is awkward. "Innovative leaf-based packaging" is more natural and formal.

  17. "a notable decrease of 21% in domestic waste" -> "a significant reduction of 21% in domestic waste"
    Explanation: "Notable decrease" is less formal and "reduction" is more precise in this context, fitting the academic style better.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt: it identifies causes for the increase in household waste and proposes solutions. The causes are clearly articulated, focusing on consumer culture and the preference for takeaway food. The solutions presented, such as government regulations and corporate responsibility, are relevant and practical. However, the essay could benefit from a more explicit connection between the causes and the proposed solutions, enhancing the overall coherence.
    • How to improve: To comprehensively address all elements of the question, the writer could explicitly link each cause to a corresponding solution. For example, after discussing consumerism, they could suggest educational campaigns to promote sustainable consumption as a direct response to that issue.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that consumer culture is the primary cause of increased household waste, and it consistently supports this view throughout. The introduction and conclusion reinforce this stance effectively. However, the phrase "collective efforts could be taken" is somewhat vague and could be interpreted in various ways, which may dilute the clarity of the position.
    • How to improve: To enhance clarity and consistency, the writer should specify what "collective efforts" entails. For instance, they could mention specific actions that individuals, communities, or governments could take, thereby solidifying their position and making it more actionable.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports its ideas well, particularly in discussing the causes of increased waste. The use of examples, such as the mention of Germany’s leaf-based containers, effectively illustrates the proposed solutions. However, some points, like the impact of consumerism, could be further developed with additional examples or statistics to strengthen the argument.
    • How to improve: To effectively present and extend ideas, the writer should consider incorporating more detailed examples or data to support their claims. For instance, they could provide statistics on the increase in takeaway food consumption or cite studies that link consumer behavior to waste generation.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic of household waste, addressing both causes and solutions without deviating into unrelated areas. The structure is logical, with clear transitions between points. However, the phrase "in many corners of the world" in the introduction could be seen as vague and might distract from the main focus.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus and relevance, the writer should avoid vague phrases that do not add value to the argument. Instead, they could specify regions or demographics affected by the issue, which would provide a clearer context and enhance the overall argument.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic and effectively communicates its points. By making the suggested improvements, the writer could enhance clarity, coherence, and depth, potentially achieving an even higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the main argument and the causes of the problem. The body paragraphs follow logically, with the first paragraph discussing the causes of increased household waste and the second addressing potential solutions. However, the transition between the discussion of causes and solutions could be smoother. For instance, the phrase "Various approaches, nevertheless, can be suggested" feels somewhat abrupt and could benefit from a more explicit connection to the preceding content.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly link the ideas between paragraphs. For example, you could introduce the solutions section with a sentence that summarizes the causes before transitioning to the solutions, such as "Given these causes, it is essential to explore effective strategies to mitigate the issue."
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly delineated. However, the second body paragraph could be further divided into two distinct paragraphs: one focusing on government actions and the other on corporate responsibilities. This would allow for a more in-depth exploration of each solution and improve readability.
    • How to improve: Consider breaking longer paragraphs into smaller ones to enhance clarity and focus. Each paragraph should ideally cover a single main idea. For example, after discussing government policies, you could start a new paragraph when discussing the role of commercial corporations in waste reduction.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "however," "furthermore," and "as far as," which help to connect ideas within and between sentences. However, there is a tendency to rely on a limited range of cohesive devices, which can make the writing feel somewhat repetitive. For instance, the phrase "this can be achieved by" is used in a similar context multiple times.
    • How to improve: To diversify the cohesive devices used, incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using "this can be achieved by," you might use alternatives such as "one effective method is" or "another approach could involve." Additionally, consider using more complex cohesive devices, such as subordinating conjunctions (e.g., "although," "because") to create more nuanced connections between ideas.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score in this criterion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with terms like "skyrocketing," "contemporary consumerism," and "non-degradable material." These choices effectively convey the urgency and complexity of the issue. However, phrases such as "excessive throw-away" could be more naturally expressed as "excessive waste" or "throwaway culture," which would enhance fluency and coherence.
    • How to improve: To further improve lexical variety, consider incorporating synonyms or related terms to avoid repetition. For instance, instead of repeating "waste" or "disposal," you could use "refuse," "litter," or "garbage" in different contexts. Additionally, exploring idiomatic expressions related to consumerism could enrich the essay.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, but there are instances of imprecise usage. For example, "the unprecedented outbreak in the demand for food packaging" could be misinterpreted; "surge" or "increase" would be more appropriate than "outbreak," which typically refers to disease. The phrase "cumulative household plastic waste" is somewhat vague; specifying "accumulation of plastic waste in households" would clarify the meaning.
    • How to improve: Focus on refining word choice to enhance clarity. When discussing complex ideas, ensure that the vocabulary accurately reflects the intended meaning. Consider using a thesaurus to find more precise alternatives and practice writing sentences that incorporate these terms in context.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay displays a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors. Words like "consumerism," "biodegradable," and "regulating" are spelled correctly, contributing to the overall professionalism of the writing.
    • How to improve: To maintain and enhance spelling accuracy, continue to proofread your work carefully. Additionally, consider keeping a list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them regularly. Using spelling and grammar checking tools can also help catch any inadvertent mistakes before submission.

Overall, to elevate the lexical resource score, the writer should focus on expanding vocabulary range, ensuring precise word choice, and maintaining high spelling standards.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. Complex sentences are effectively utilized, such as “people are bombarded with tempting commercials that encourage them to constantly purchase new items instead of reusing the old ones or getting the existing ones repaired.” This showcases the writer’s ability to convey intricate ideas clearly. Additionally, the use of conditional structures, as seen in “if the governments to implement policies,” adds depth to the argument. However, there are instances of simpler structures that could have been enhanced for greater sophistication.
    • How to improve: To diversify sentence structures further, the writer could incorporate more varied introductory phrases and clauses. For example, using participial phrases (“Having recognized the problem, authorities could…”) or inversion (“Rarely do we see…”) could add complexity. Additionally, integrating more compound-complex sentences would enhance the overall fluency and sophistication of the writing.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits strong grammatical accuracy, with only minor errors. For instance, the phrase “the unprecedented outbreak in the demand for food packaging” is slightly awkward; a more precise term like "surge" could improve clarity. Punctuation is mostly correct, but there are a few areas where commas could enhance readability, such as before “nevertheless” in the transition to the solutions section.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on refining awkward phrases and ensuring clarity in expression. Additionally, a thorough proofreading process could help catch minor punctuation errors. Practicing the placement of commas in complex sentences, especially around transitional phrases and clauses, would further enhance the essay’s readability.

Overall, the essay reflects a high level of grammatical range and accuracy, with room for improvement in sentence variety and minor grammatical precision.

Bài sửa mẫu

It is true that these days are witnessing a daily escalating increase in domestic waste disposal, specifically food packaging, in many corners of the world. I believe that consumer culture is the primary cause behind this phenomenon, while collective efforts could be taken to tackle this issue.

The two main factors contributing to this excessive disposal are contemporary consumerism and a preference for takeaway food. Regarding the former, in today’s world, people are exposed to enticing advertisements that encourage them to constantly purchase new items instead of reusing old ones or repairing existing products. Such a disposal habit can lead to excessive waste, whether it be outdated electronic devices or empty containers that previously held beverages. Furthermore, due to the current fast-paced life and hectic schedules, individuals are often pressed for time, leaving little opportunity for meal preparation. Takeaway food is ideally suited to this modern lifestyle, resulting in a marked increase in demand for food packaging. However, the majority of these food packages are made of plastic—a non-biodegradable material—which means that this waste not only increasingly accumulates but also rarely degrades over time, generating cumulative household plastic waste.

Several strategies, however, could be implemented by authorities and non-governmental organizations to reduce domestic disposal. The first feasible solution is for governments to introduce policies that regulate the amount of domestic waste. This can be achieved by controlling how many tonnes of disposed substances are allowed weekly and imposing corresponding financial penalties for non-compliance. This approach would require individuals to strike a balance between purchasing and disposing. As for the role of commercial corporations, they should focus on manufacturing either recyclable or biodegradable food containers to alleviate cumulative plastic waste. The effectiveness of this approach can be seen in Germany, which has recently introduced innovative leaf-based packaging. As a result, a significant reduction of 21% in domestic waste was observed in the latest recorded year.

To conclude, the unprecedented rise in household disposal primarily stems from people’s contemporary lifestyles. However, by taking collective action, this adverse phenomenon could be effectively addressed.

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