Nowadays some parents think that spoken English is more important than English grammar. Do you agree or disagree? Write an essay 180-240 words to express your idea

I concur with various parental viewpoints that spoken English plays a more significant role than English grammar. I hold this opinion because spoken English is more practical nowadays and mastery of grammatical rules may not enhance language proficiency as effectively as oral communication
One compelling reason why I emphasize the importance of learning spoken language is its practicality. Proficiency in English enables individuals to communicate with foreign speakers, a benefit not obtained through grammar studies. This can create additional advantageous prospects for their professional and personal endeavors. For example, from a business context, effective communication in English aids entrepreneur collaborate with international partners, facilitating increased opportunity for career advancement and therefore higher income for private life management.
Another aspect that aligns with my concurrence with certain parental viewpoints is the security in the development of the linguistic proficiency of English learners. From a scientific view, studying a language without speaking cannot stimulate the progress of language-related regions in the brain. The rationale behind this phenomenon is learners do not proactively improve their English through writing or speaking but via passive ways such as learning grammar. Consequently, learners not only waste their time but also study for not good results.
In conclusion, I agree with some parents' perspectives regarding the priority of learning spoken English over grammar due to its pragmatic approach and the linguistic efficiency it provides

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

"I concur" -> "I agree"
Explanation: While "concur" is not incorrect, "I agree" is a more straightforward and commonly used expression in academic writing, contributing to a clearer and less formal tone.
"spoken English plays a more significant role than English grammar" -> "oral communication is more crucial than a focus on English grammar"
Explanation: Replacing "spoken English plays a more significant role than English grammar" with "oral communication is more crucial than a focus on English grammar" provides a more precise and academically formal expression.
"hold this opinion" -> "maintain this perspective"
Explanation: Substituting "hold this opinion" with "maintain this perspective" adds a touch of formality and elevates the academic tone of the statement.
"mastery of grammatical rules" -> "proficiency in grammatical rules"
Explanation: Changing "mastery of grammatical rules" to "proficiency in grammatical rules" enhances the precision of language and maintains a formal tone.
"may not enhance language proficiency as effectively as oral communication" -> "may not contribute to language proficiency as effectively as oral communication does"
Explanation: Expanding "may not enhance language proficiency as effectively as oral communication" to "may not contribute to language proficiency as effectively as oral communication does" improves clarity and maintains formality.
"compelling reason" -> "persuasive argument"
Explanation: Substituting "compelling reason" with "persuasive argument" adds a more sophisticated touch to the sentence.
"This can create additional advantageous prospects" -> "This can generate further advantageous opportunities"
Explanation: Changing "This can create additional advantageous prospects" to "This can generate further advantageous opportunities" introduces a more formal and precise expression.
"for their professional and personal endeavors" -> "in their professional and personal pursuits"
Explanation: Replacing "for their professional and personal endeavors" with "in their professional and personal pursuits" maintains formality and improves the flow of the sentence.
"entrepreneur collaborate" -> "entrepreneurs collaborate"
Explanation: Correcting the subject-verb agreement by changing "entrepreneur collaborate" to "entrepreneurs collaborate."
"and therefore higher income for private life management" -> "resulting in higher income for managing private affairs"
Explanation: Rewording "and therefore higher income for private life management" to "resulting in higher income for managing private affairs" provides a more precise and formal expression.
"Another aspect that aligns with my concurrence" -> "Another aspect supporting my agreement"
Explanation: Substituting "Another aspect that aligns with my concurrence" with "Another aspect supporting my agreement" maintains formality and clarity.
"the security in the development of the linguistic proficiency of English learners" -> "the assurance in the development of linguistic proficiency among English learners"
Explanation: Adjusting "the security in the development of the linguistic proficiency of English learners" to "the assurance in the development of linguistic proficiency among English learners" enhances the formality and precision of the statement.
"From a scientific view" -> "From a scientific standpoint"
Explanation: Changing "From a scientific view" to "From a scientific standpoint" adds a touch of formality to the transition.
"studying a language without speaking cannot stimulate" -> "learning a language without active speaking does not stimulate"
Explanation: Replacing "studying a language without speaking cannot stimulate" with "learning a language without active speaking does not stimulate" maintains formality and improves clarity.
"proactively improve their English through writing or speaking but via passive ways" -> "actively enhance their English through writing or speaking, as opposed to passive methods"
Explanation: Restructuring "proactively improve their English through writing or speaking but via passive ways" to "actively enhance their English through writing or speaking, as opposed to passive methods" clarifies the sentence and maintains a formal tone.
"study for not good results" -> "study for unsatisfactory outcomes"
Explanation: Replacing "study for not good results" with "study for unsatisfactory outcomes" improves the formality and precision of the expression.
"I agree with some parents’ perspectives" -> "I agree with certain parental viewpoints"
Explanation: Substituting "I agree with some parents’ perspectives" with "I agree with certain parental viewpoints" maintains formality and adds precision to the statement.
"the priority of learning spoken English over grammar" -> "the prioritization of oral communication over grammatical focus"
Explanation: Changing "the priority of learning spoken English over grammar" to "the prioritization of oral communication over grammatical focus" enhances the formality and precision of the sentence.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8 – UNDER WORD

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses all parts of the question. It discusses the importance of spoken English compared to English grammar, providing reasons and examples.
- How to improve: While the essay answers the question, it could benefit from a more detailed exploration of the opposing viewpoint. Including a brief acknowledgment or counterargument to enhance the depth of analysis would be beneficial.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear and consistent position throughout, stating a preference for spoken English and supporting it with relevant examples.
- How to improve: To further strengthen the clarity, consider introducing a thesis statement in the introduction that explicitly outlines the essay’s stance. This can provide a roadmap for readers.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents, extends, and supports ideas well. It provides specific examples, such as the business context, to illustrate the practicality of spoken English.
- How to improve: To enhance the essay, consider providing more depth in the development of ideas. Elaborate further on the impact of spoken English in various aspects of life and communication.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, discussing the importance of spoken English in comparison to grammar.
- How to improve: To improve focus, ensure that each example or argument directly connects to the topic. Avoid any tangential discussions that do not contribute to the overall theme.

Overall Feedback:

The essay effectively addresses the prompt, presenting a clear and well-supported argument for the prioritization of spoken English over grammar. To enhance the essay, consider exploring the opposing viewpoint in more detail, providing a thesis statement for improved clarity, and offering more depth in the development of ideas. Additionally, maintain strict adherence to the word limit specified in the prompt to ensure concise and effective communication. Overall, a well-executed response with room for minor improvements.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 6

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of information. It begins with a clear thesis statement, followed by supporting points that are presented in a coherent order. For instance, the essay starts by introducing the importance of spoken English and then proceeds to provide reasons supporting this viewpoint. However, the transitions between the paragraphs could be smoother. There is a need for more explicit connections between ideas to enhance the overall flow.
- How to improve: To improve logical organization, consider using more transitional phrases to guide the reader through the essay. For instance, use words like "Furthermore," "Moreover," or "In addition" to signal the progression from one idea to the next. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, making it easier for the reader to follow the argument.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay is structured into paragraphs, but there is room for improvement in terms of paragraphing effectiveness. While the introduction and conclusion are distinct, some body paragraphs contain multiple ideas without clear separation. Effective paragraphing should include a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a smooth transition to the next paragraph.
- How to improve: Work on creating well-defined paragraphs. Begin each paragraph with a topic sentence that introduces the main idea, followed by supporting details or examples. Ensure a smooth transition between paragraphs to maintain the logical flow of ideas. For example, the second paragraph could be split into two, with one focused on the practicality of spoken English and the other on its advantages in professional and personal contexts.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "for example" and "another aspect." However, there is a need for more variety and precision in the use of cohesive devices. This will help create stronger connections between ideas and improve the overall coherence of the essay.
- How to improve: Expand the range of cohesive devices used. Consider incorporating transition words like "however," "consequently," or "in conclusion" to better connect contrasting or concluding ideas. Use pronouns and synonyms effectively to avoid repetitive phrasing. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "spoken English," consider using synonyms like "oral communication" or "verbal language" for variety.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonably wide range of vocabulary, with varied terms such as "proficiency," "advantageous prospects," and "linguistic efficiency." However, there is room for improvement as some ideas are expressed using repetitive phrases like "from a business context" and "from a scientific view."
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary diversity, consider using synonyms and alternative expressions. For instance, instead of consistently using "from a," explore different ways to introduce perspectives or viewpoints.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary with moderate precision. For example, the phrase "the security in the development of the linguistic proficiency" could be more precisely expressed. Also, there are instances where more precise terms could replace generic ones, such as "advantageous prospects."
- How to improve: Aim for precision by choosing specific words that convey your intended meaning accurately. Instead of using broad terms, opt for vocabulary that precisely captures the nuance of your ideas. For instance, consider rephrasing the mentioned phrase to highlight the specific aspect of linguistic development you are referring to.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits a satisfactory level of spelling accuracy. However, there are a few instances of errors, such as "entrepreneur" (missing article "an") and "not good results" (should be "no good results"). These minor errors slightly impact the overall spelling accuracy.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, proofread your essay carefully, paying attention to details such as articles and word choice. Additionally, consider utilizing spell-check tools or asking a peer to review your work for a fresh perspective. Developing a habit of proofreading will contribute to improved spelling accuracy.

In conclusion, while the essay demonstrates a competent use of vocabulary and generally maintains correct spelling, there is room for improvement in terms of vocabulary diversity, precision, and meticulous spelling. The suggested enhancements aim to elevate the lexical resource to a higher band score by refining the expression of ideas and ensuring a more nuanced and accurate use of language.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a satisfactory range of sentence structures. The writer effectively employs various sentence types, including simple and complex sentences. For instance, the essay uses complex sentences to present supporting points, such as the explanation of practical benefits in the business context. However, there is room for improvement in sentence variety, as the majority of sentences are of medium length and structure, and some complexity could be added for further impact.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, consider incorporating compound-complex sentences and varying the length of sentences for a more engaging and sophisticated expression. For instance, integrate shorter, punchy sentences with longer, more complex ones to create a dynamic rhythm and capture the reader’s attention.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains grammatical accuracy, but there are instances where the use of articles, such as "the" and "a," could be refined. For example, in the phrase "benefit not obtained through grammar studies," adding "the" before "grammar studies" would improve clarity. Additionally, there are a few punctuation errors, like missing commas in some places. For instance, a comma is needed after "For example" to properly introduce the illustration.
- How to improve: Focus on precise article usage, ensuring that articles are used appropriately to convey exact meaning. Regarding punctuation, pay close attention to comma usage, especially before conjunctions like "and" and "but." Carefully proofread the essay to identify and correct these specific instances, enhancing overall grammatical accuracy.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a strong command of grammar and a good range of structures, refining sentence variety and addressing specific grammatical and punctuation nuances will contribute to further improving the essay’s effectiveness.

Bài sửa mẫu

I agree with the belief held by many parents that oral communication is more crucial than a focus on English grammar. I maintain this perspective because proficiency in grammatical rules may not contribute to language proficiency as effectively as oral communication does.

One persuasive argument supporting the prioritization of spoken English is its practicality in today’s context. Mastery of English allows individuals to communicate with people from different countries, a skill not acquired through intensive grammar studies. This can generate further advantageous opportunities in both their professional and personal pursuits. For instance, entrepreneurs collaborate with international partners, resulting in higher income for managing private affairs.

Another aspect supporting my agreement is the assurance in the development of linguistic proficiency among English learners. From a scientific standpoint, learning a language without active speaking does not stimulate the progress of language-related regions in the brain. The rationale behind this phenomenon is that learners do not actively enhance their English through writing or speaking, as opposed to passive methods like grammar study. Consequently, they may study for unsatisfactory outcomes.

In conclusion, I agree with certain parental viewpoints regarding the prioritization of oral communication over grammatical focus. This is due to its pragmatic approach and the linguistic efficiency it provides, allowing individuals to thrive in a globalized world.