Some people think that countries should produce all the food for their populations to eat and import as little as possible. Others disagree with this opinion and are of the belief that governments should import as much as possible. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that countries should produce all the food for their populations to eat and import as little as possible. Others disagree with this opinion and are of the belief that governments should import as much as possible.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some modern countries, food importation has been under the spotlight for a while with an ongoing debate over whether a country should be totally self-reliant on food and simply import a small amount of food. In my opinion, to supplement local food supplies, countries are not allowed to give up importing certain foods and will not be able to depend on imports from other countries.
Local products benefit both farmers and governments for many reasons. First, it helps farmers have the opportunity to increase their income to meet the needs of their homeland. Second, population-based demand analysis becomes easy, thereby promoting the supply of products that ensure minimal food waste. For example, prove to improve the economy as both local production and consumption can effectively restore cash flow.
Diverse climatic and geographical circumstances make particular crops more suitable for some countries than others. For example, efforts to grow tropical fruits in temperate climates may require too many resources and energy, leading to unsustainable agricultural practices and ecological disparities. Trade allows countries to take advantage of comparative advantage, accessing products that are scarce or costly to produce domestically. Additionally, the pursuit of complete self-sufficiency can lead to the neglect of other important sectors of the economy, as resources are disproportionately allocated to food production.
From the above opinions, I think that both food sources are important based on geographical location and favorable resources to consider and control expenditures on food imports and increasing domestic goods for regional areas. neighboring area.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

"In some modern countries" -> "In several contemporary nations"
Explanation: Replacing "modern countries" with "contemporary nations" maintains formality and avoids the colloquial tone of "modern."
"under the spotlight for a while" -> "the subject of ongoing scrutiny"
Explanation: "Under the spotlight for a while" is informal; "the subject of ongoing scrutiny" conveys the same meaning in a more formal manner.
"simply import a small amount of food" -> "merely rely on minimal food imports"
Explanation: "Simply import a small amount of food" lacks precision and formality; "merely rely on minimal food imports" clarifies the idea without losing academic tone.
"not allowed to give up importing certain foods" -> "not permitted to cease importing specific food items"
Explanation: "Not allowed to give up importing certain foods" is somewhat awkward; "not permitted to cease importing specific food items" offers a clearer and more formal alternative.
"Local products benefit both farmers and governments" -> "Locally produced goods benefit both agricultural producers and governmental entities"
Explanation: "Local products" is vague and informal; "locally produced goods" is clearer and more formal, while "agricultural producers" is a more precise term than "farmers."
"have the opportunity to increase their income to meet the needs of their homeland" -> "have the opportunity to enhance their income to address the needs of their respective countries"
Explanation: "To meet the needs of their homeland" is informal and lacks precision; "to address the needs of their respective countries" offers a clearer and more formal expression.
"population-based demand analysis becomes easy" -> "analysis of demand based on population becomes simplified"
Explanation: "Population-based demand analysis becomes easy" is overly simplistic; "analysis of demand based on population becomes simplified" maintains formality while clarifying the idea.
"proving to improve the economy" -> "demonstrating economic improvement"
Explanation: "Proving to improve the economy" is awkward; "demonstrating economic improvement" is a more direct and formal expression.
"climatic and geographical circumstances" -> "climatic and geographic conditions"
Explanation: "Circumstances" is slightly informal; "conditions" is a more formal and precise term.
"For example, efforts to grow tropical fruits in temperate climates may require too many resources and energy" -> "For instance, attempts to cultivate tropical fruits in temperate zones may necessitate excessive resource and energy consumption"
Explanation: The original sentence lacks precision and formality; the suggested alternative is clearer and more academically appropriate.
"Trade allows countries to take advantage of comparative advantage" -> "Trade enables nations to leverage their comparative advantages"
Explanation: The repetition of "advantage" weakens the sentence; using "leverage" and rephrasing enhances clarity and formality.
"pursuit of complete self-sufficiency" -> "pursuit of total self-reliance"
Explanation: "Complete self-sufficiency" is slightly informal; "total self-reliance" is more formal and precise.
"From the above opinions" -> "Based on the aforementioned perspectives"
Explanation: "From the above opinions" is informal; "Based on the aforementioned perspectives" is more formal and academically appropriate.
"I think that both food sources are important" -> "Both food sources are deemed significant"
Explanation: "I think that" is unnecessary in formal writing; "deemed significant" is more formal and precise.
"geographical location and favorable resources" -> "geographic location and advantageous resources"
Explanation: "Geographical location" is slightly redundant; "geographic location" and "favorable resources" is more precise and formal.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Task Response: 6

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses both sides of the argument by discussing the benefits of both producing food domestically and importing it. It acknowledges the complexity of the issue and presents a balanced view.
- How to improve: While the essay mentions the importance of considering geographical location and available resources, it could further elaborate on how these factors influence the debate. Providing specific examples or statistics could enhance the depth of analysis.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear stance that both domestic production and food importation are important, depending on geographical and resource considerations.
- How to improve: To further strengthen the clarity of the position, the essay could explicitly state the reasons why both approaches are necessary and provide more specific examples to support this argument.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas coherently and provides some examples to support its points, such as the benefits of local production for farmers and economies.
- How to improve: To enhance the extension and support of ideas, the essay could include more detailed examples or case studies demonstrating the advantages and disadvantages of both domestic production and food importation. Additionally, providing counterarguments and refutations would add depth to the analysis.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic by discussing the pros and cons of food production and importation, though it could delve deeper into certain aspects.
- How to improve: To ensure better adherence to the topic, the essay could focus more explicitly on the reasons why some advocate for complete self-reliance in food production and why others support importing food. Providing a clear framework for evaluating these perspectives would enhance the relevance of the discussion.

Overall, while the essay effectively addresses the prompt and presents a coherent argument, there is room for improvement in providing more detailed analysis, examples, and counterarguments to strengthen the overall response and achieve a higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of information. It begins with an introduction that presents the topic and the writer’s opinion. Following this, the body paragraphs discuss the benefits of local food production, the importance of considering geographical factors in food production, and the drawbacks of over-reliance on imports. Each paragraph introduces a new point and supports it with relevant examples and explanations.
- How to improve: To further enhance logical organization, consider providing smoother transitions between paragraphs to create a more cohesive flow of ideas. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to avoid potential confusion for the reader.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay utilizes paragraphs effectively to separate different aspects of the argument. Each paragraph addresses a distinct point, such as the benefits of local production, geographical considerations, and the drawbacks of over-reliance on imports. However, some paragraphs could be more developed to provide deeper analysis and elaboration.
- How to improve: Consider expanding on each paragraph by providing more specific examples, evidence, or counterarguments to strengthen the overall argument. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a cohesive structure with supporting details.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices to connect ideas and create coherence. For instance, it uses transition words like "first," "second," and "additionally" to indicate the sequence of ideas and introduce new points. Moreover, pronouns such as "it" and "this" help refer back to previously mentioned concepts for clarity.
- How to improve: While cohesive devices are used adequately, consider incorporating a wider range of connectors and transitions to create smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs. Additionally, ensure that cohesive devices are used consistently throughout the essay to maintain coherence and aid reader comprehension.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a satisfactory range of vocabulary, incorporating terms such as "self-reliant," "importation," "supplement," "climatic," "geographical circumstances," "comparative advantage," and "disparities." These vocabulary choices contribute to a coherent discussion of the topic.
- How to improve: To further enhance the lexical resource, consider incorporating more varied and sophisticated vocabulary, particularly in expressing nuanced ideas and arguments. For instance, instead of "geographical circumstances," one could use "topographical diversity" or "ecological variability" for added precision and sophistication.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally employs vocabulary with reasonable precision. However, there are instances where vocabulary could be more precise or contextually appropriate. For example, the phrase "to supplement local food supplies" effectively conveys the idea but could be strengthened with a more precise term like "to augment local food reserves," which better captures the intent.
- How to improve: To improve precision, strive to select words that precisely convey the intended meaning and context. Utilize synonyms and varied expressions to avoid repetition and enhance clarity. Additionally, consider the connotations and implications of each word choice to ensure alignment with the intended message.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay demonstrates a satisfactory level of spelling accuracy. There are minimal spelling errors observed, such as "prove" instead of "proves" and "expenditures" instead of "expenditure." However, these errors do not significantly detract from the overall readability and comprehension of the essay.
- How to improve: To further enhance spelling accuracy, consider employing proofreading techniques such as spell-checking tools, reading the essay aloud to identify errors, and seeking feedback from peers or educators. Additionally, developing a habit of reviewing written work systematically before submission can help minimize spelling errors and improve overall writing quality.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. It includes simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, there are simple sentences like "Local products benefit both farmers and governments for many reasons," compound sentences such as "Diverse climatic and geographical circumstances make particular crops more suitable for some countries than others," and complex sentences like "Additionally, the pursuit of complete self-sufficiency can lead to the neglect of other important sectors of the economy, as resources are disproportionately allocated to food production."
- How to improve: To further enhance the variety and effectiveness of sentence structures, consider incorporating more complex sentence structures, such as using relative clauses, conditional sentences, and inversion for emphasis. Additionally, ensure that sentence lengths vary appropriately to maintain reader engagement and flow.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy. However, there are areas where improvement can be made. For example, there are minor errors like missing articles ("to supplement local food supplies" could be "to supplement the local food supplies") and agreement issues ("proove to improve" should be "proves to improve"). Punctuation is generally used correctly, but there are occasional lapses such as missing commas or incorrect usage.
- How to improve: Focus on reviewing and practicing articles (definite and indefinite) to ensure they are used correctly. Work on subject-verb agreement to avoid errors like the one mentioned above. Regarding punctuation, pay attention to comma usage in complex sentences, especially when separating clauses. Reviewing these areas regularly and seeking feedback can significantly improve grammatical accuracy and punctuation skills.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong grasp of grammar and a decent range of sentence structures, contributing to its Band 7 score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy. Continued practice in varied sentence structures and meticulous attention to grammatical details will further enhance the quality of written expression.

Bài sửa mẫu

In several contemporary nations, the issue of food importation has sparked debate, with some advocating for total self-reliance in food production while others argue for increased reliance on imports. In my view, a balanced approach is necessary, wherein countries should prioritize local production while still permitting strategic food imports.

Locally produced goods benefit both agricultural producers and governmental entities in various ways. Firstly, they provide farmers with opportunities to augment their income to address the needs of their respective countries. Secondly, analyzing demand based on population becomes simplified, thus minimizing food wastage. This dual approach fosters economic improvement by enhancing both production and consumption, thereby sustaining cash flow within the domestic economy.

It’s crucial to acknowledge the influence of climatic and geographic conditions on agricultural viability. For instance, attempting to cultivate tropical fruits in temperate zones may necessitate excessive resource and energy consumption, leading to unsustainable practices. Trade enables nations to leverage their comparative advantages, accessing products that may be scarce or economically unfeasible to produce domestically.

However, the pursuit of total self-reliance in food production may divert resources from other vital sectors of the economy. Thus, a balanced strategy that integrates both local production and strategic imports is essential for sustainable development.

In conclusion, both food sources hold significance, contingent upon geographic location and advantageous resources. Governments should strive to strike a balance between controlling expenditures on food imports and promoting domestic production, particularly in regional areas and neighboring regions.