The graph and chart below give information about 3D cinema screens and film releases. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph and chart below give information about 3D cinema screens and film
releases.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make
comparisons where relevant.

The given line graph and bar chart depict insights into global digital 3D screens and global 3D cinema releases, respectively, since 2008. Overall, there is a significant correlation between these two factors.
Regarding the graph, it is evident that the number of 3D cinema screens witnessed a consistent growth. In the first four years, the quantity remained relatively low, under 5000 screens. However, a substantial rise occurred from 2009 onwards, reaching around 20000 in 2010 and surpassing 35000 by 2011.
Meanwhile, a similar upward trend was exhibited in 3D film releases. Initially, live-action films were not produced. Between 2005 and 2008, the total number of live-action and animation releases were minimal with under five per year. From 2009, the number of releases rose sharply. Notably, the number of live-action films gradually exceeded that of animations. In 2012, the total number of 3D releases surpassed 70; in particular, the quantity of live-action films doubled that of animated films.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The given line graph and bar chart" -> "The provided line graph and bar chart"
Explanation: "Provided" is more formal and precise than "given," which is somewhat informal and vague in this context, enhancing the academic tone of the sentence.
"global digital 3D screens" -> "global digital 3D screen installations"
Explanation: "Screen installations" is a more precise term that accurately describes the type of data being measured, enhancing specificity and formality.
"a significant correlation" -> "a notable correlation"
Explanation: "Notable" is a more academically appropriate term than "significant," which can sometimes imply a statistical significance that is not explicitly stated in the data.
"Regarding the graph" -> "With regard to the graph"
Explanation: "With regard to" is a more formal transitional phrase suitable for academic writing, improving the flow and formality of the text.
"the quantity remained relatively low" -> "the quantity remained relatively small"
Explanation: "Small" is more specific and academically appropriate than "low," which is somewhat vague and less precise in this context.
"a substantial rise occurred" -> "a significant increase occurred"
Explanation: "Increase" is more specific and commonly used in academic contexts to describe changes in quantity, making it more suitable than "rise."
"surpassing 35000" -> "exceeding 35,000"
Explanation: "Exceeding" is a more precise verb for describing surpassing a numerical value, and the comma after the number is necessary for clarity and readability.
"a similar upward trend was exhibited" -> "a similar upward trend was observed"
Explanation: "Observed" is more formal and precise than "exhibited," which can imply a display or presentation rather than the observation of data.
"Initially, live-action films were not produced" -> "Initially, no live-action films were produced"
Explanation: "No" is more direct and clear, avoiding the awkward construction "live-action films were not produced."
"the total number of live-action and animation releases were minimal" -> "the total number of live-action and animation releases was minimal"
Explanation: "Was" agrees with the singular subject "total number," correcting the grammatical error and maintaining subject-verb agreement.
"rose sharply" -> "increased significantly"
Explanation: "Increased significantly" is a more formal and precise way to describe a notable change in quantity, aligning better with academic style.
"the number of live-action films gradually exceeded that of animations" -> "the number of live-action films gradually surpassed that of animation"
Explanation: "Surpassed" is a more precise term than "exceeded" in this context, and "animation" should be singular to match the singular form "that of."
"the quantity of live-action films doubled that of animated films" -> "the number of live-action films doubled that of animated films"
Explanation: "Number" is more specific and appropriate for counting discrete items like films, whereas "quantity" is more general and less precise.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7

Explanation: The essay provides a clear overview of the main trends in the data. It accurately describes the growth in both 3D cinema screens and 3D film releases, highlighting the key features of each trend. The essay also makes relevant comparisons between the two data sets, noting the correlation between the growth in screens and releases. However, the essay could be more fully extended by providing more specific details about the trends, such as the rate of growth in each year or the specific types of films that were released.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more specific details about the trends in the data. For example, the essay could state that the number of 3D cinema screens increased by approximately 15,000 between 2009 and 2010, or that the number of live-action 3D films released in 2012 was double the number of animated films released in that year. The essay could also provide more specific examples of the types of films that were released in 3D, such as "Avatar" or "Transformers."

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay logically organizes information and ideas, demonstrating clear progression throughout. The introduction effectively sets the context, and the body paragraphs present relevant details about the graph and chart. There is a clear central topic within each paragraph, which helps maintain coherence. However, while cohesive devices are used appropriately, there are instances of slight overuse, particularly in linking phrases. Additionally, the paragraphing is generally effective but could be improved for better clarity in transitions between ideas.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on enhancing the variety and precision of cohesive devices to avoid any perception of overuse. Additionally, ensuring that each paragraph has a more distinct focus could improve clarity. Incorporating more sophisticated linking phrases or transitions could also help to create a smoother flow between ideas, thereby enhancing overall coherence.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, allowing for some flexibility and precision in conveying information about the graphs. The use of terms like "depict," "insights," "significant correlation," and "upward trend" indicates an awareness of style and context. However, there are occasional inaccuracies in word choice, such as "witnessed a consistent growth" which could be more naturally phrased as "experienced consistent growth." Additionally, while the essay attempts to use less common vocabulary, it does not fully exploit the range available, which prevents it from reaching a higher band.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on expanding their vocabulary further, incorporating more sophisticated and less common lexical items. Additionally, ensuring precise word choice and avoiding minor inaccuracies will enhance the overall quality. Practicing varied sentence structures and collocations can also contribute to a more natural flow and demonstrate greater lexical control.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a variety of complex sentence structures and produces frequent error-free sentences. The writer shows good control of grammar and punctuation, although there are a few minor errors present. For instance, the phrase "the quantity remained relatively low" could be more accurately expressed as "the number remained relatively low," as "quantity" is less appropriate in this context. Additionally, the use of "witnessed a consistent growth" could be more effectively stated as "experienced consistent growth." Overall, the grammatical range is adequate, but the presence of these errors prevents a higher score.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on refining their grammatical accuracy by proofreading for minor errors and ensuring that word choices are contextually appropriate. Expanding the variety of sentence structures used, particularly with more complex forms, could also enhance the overall grammatical range. Furthermore, ensuring that all sentences are error-free will contribute significantly to a higher score in this criterion.

Bài sửa mẫu

The given line graph and bar chart illustrate information regarding global digital 3D screens and global 3D cinema releases since 2008. Overall, there is a significant correlation between these two factors.

Regarding the graph, it is evident that the number of 3D cinema screens experienced consistent growth. In the first four years, the quantity remained relatively low, below 5,000 screens. However, a substantial increase occurred from 2009 onwards, reaching approximately 20,000 in 2010 and surpassing 35,000 by 2011.

Meanwhile, a similar upward trend was observed in 3D film releases. Initially, live-action films were not produced. Between 2005 and 2008, the total number of live-action and animated releases was minimal, with fewer than five per year. From 2009, the number of releases rose sharply. Notably, the number of live-action films gradually exceeded that of animated films. By 2012, the total number of 3D releases surpassed 70; in particular, the quantity of live-action films was double that of animated films.