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The world of work is rapidly changing and employees cannot depend on having the same job or the same working conditions for life. Why is it the case? Can you suggest some ways to prepare people to work in the future?

The world of work is rapidly changing and employees cannot depend on
having the same job or the same working conditions for life.
Why is it the case? Can you suggest some ways to prepare people to work in the
future?

It is evident that the work in the world significantly changing and workers cannot rely on having the same job or the same working conditions for their lives. There are many reasons for this situation and it also has numerous measures for employees to prepare for their work in the future.
Firstly, we are going to talk about the reasons. With the development of digitals and technologies, we will have new technology that serves our work and lives. Moreover, this innovation may replace some jobs in the future to help businesses save time and money a lot. Therefore, employees should improve their not only academic knowledge but also their soft skills so that they can perform their abilities better. In some areas like technology or industry, workers are under pressure more than other jobs because their work changes continually to meet the demands of the market.
Therefore, people have to prepare well for their both professional skills and soft skills to meet the requirements of their organization. Firstly, they must have self-studied skills. The world changing dramatically and it always has new things so they have to study every day, everywhere. In the future, they will appreciate what they learned in the past. Secondly, teamwork skills also essential. We are working in an organization so teamwork is regular, even every day. Additionally, teamwork helps others improve many aspects such as problem-solving, critical thinking and communication.
In conclusion, as I mentioned above, the world changing continually so employees should have to improve themselves in order to meet the demands and have the best skills to perform well in their work.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "the work in the world significantly changing" -> "work dynamics worldwide are undergoing significant changes"
    Explanation: The phrase "the work in the world significantly changing" lacks precision and formal tone. Replacing it with "work dynamics worldwide are undergoing significant changes" provides a more precise description and aligns better with an academic tone.

  2. "cannot rely on having the same job or the same working conditions for their lives" -> "cannot depend on persisting in the same job or maintaining consistent working conditions throughout their lives"
    Explanation: The original phrase lacks formality and precision. Replacing it with a more elaborate expression enhances the clarity and formal tone, emphasizing the instability of sticking to one job or consistent working conditions.

  3. "There are many reasons for this situation and it also has numerous measures for employees to prepare for their work in the future." -> "Several factors contribute to this situation, necessitating various measures for employees to prepare for future work scenarios."
    Explanation: The original sentence lacks specificity and uses casual language. The revised version offers a more precise and formal structure, highlighting the contributing factors and emphasizing the need for preparedness among employees.

  4. "Firstly, we are going to talk about the reasons." -> "Firstly, let us discuss the causal factors."
    Explanation: The phrase "we are going to talk about" is informal; replacing it with "let us discuss" maintains formality and conciseness, suitable for an academic context.

  5. "development of digitals and technologies" -> "advancements in digital technology"
    Explanation: "Development of digitals and technologies" is an awkward phrasing. The revised version is more concise and appropriately refers to advancements in technology.

  6. "we will have new technology that serves our work and lives" -> "emergence of new technologies facilitating work and daily life"
    Explanation: The original sentence is imprecise and lacks formality. The revised version conveys a clearer message in a more formal tone, emphasizing the role of technology in work and daily life.

  7. "this innovation may replace some jobs in the future" -> "these innovations might potentially displace certain job roles in the future"
    Explanation: Using "innovation" without specifying leads to ambiguity. The revised version clarifies by referring to "innovations" and their potential impact on specific job roles, maintaining a formal tone.

  8. "Therefore, employees should improve their not only academic knowledge but also their soft skills" -> "Hence, employees should enhance not only their academic knowledge but also their soft skills."
    Explanation: The original sentence lacks structure and formality. The revised version rephrases the statement more precisely and formally.

  9. "to perform their abilities better" -> "to enhance their performance capabilities"
    Explanation: The original phrase lacks precision. The revised version uses a more appropriate and formal expression.

  10. "In some areas like technology or industry, workers are under pressure more than other jobs because their work changes continually to meet the demands of the market." -> "In sectors such as technology or industry, employees face greater pressure due to the constant evolution of their roles to meet market demands."
    Explanation: The original sentence lacks clarity and formal structure. The revised version clarifies the sectors and their challenges more precisely and academically.

  11. "people have to prepare well for their both professional skills and soft skills" -> "individuals need to adequately prepare for both their professional expertise and soft skills"
    Explanation: The original phrase lacks formality and precision. The revised version maintains clarity while using a more formal tone.

  12. "they must have self-studied skills" -> "they must possess self-learning abilities"
    Explanation: "Self-studied skills" is an awkward term; "self-learning abilities" is more appropriate and formal in an academic context.

  13. "Secondly, teamwork skills also essential." -> "Secondly, teamwork skills are equally essential."
    Explanation: The original phrase lacks proper structure and formality. The revised version provides a more accurate and formal expression.

  14. "We are working in an organization so teamwork is regular, even every day." -> "Given that we operate within an organizational framework, regular engagement in teamwork is commonplace, occurring on a daily basis."
    Explanation: The original sentence is informal and lacks precision. The revised version enhances formality and clarity, aligning better with academic writing standards.

  15. "so employees should have to improve themselves" -> "thus, employees should strive to enhance their skills"
    Explanation: The original phrase is wordy and lacks formality. The revised version offers a more concise and formal expression.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

  1. Quoted text: "It is evident that the work in the world significantly changing and workers cannot rely on having the same job or the same working conditions for their lives. There are many reasons for this situation and it also has numerous measures for employees to prepare for their work in the future."

    • Explanation and Improvement Suggestions: The introduction provides a clear stance on the changing nature of work but lacks specificity about the reasons and measures for preparation. It would be beneficial to briefly outline the main reasons and measures that will be discussed in the essay. This would enhance the reader’s understanding of the essay’s structure and direction.
    • Improved example: "In the rapidly evolving world of work, employees can no longer expect lifelong job stability or consistent working conditions. This essay will explore the multifaceted reasons behind this shift and suggest various measures for individuals to prepare effectively for the future job landscape."
  2. Quoted text: "Firstly, we are going to talk about the reasons. With the development of digitals and technologies, we will have new technology that serves our work and lives. Moreover, this innovation may replace some jobs in the future to help businesses save time and money a lot. Therefore, employees should improve their not only academic knowledge but also their soft skills so that they can perform their abilities better."

    • Explanation and Improvement Suggestions: The paragraph discusses the impact of technology on jobs but lacks specific examples and depth in discussing how academic knowledge and soft skills should be improved. Provide concrete examples and delve deeper into the specific skills that individuals need to develop.
    • Improved example: "To illustrate, the rise of digital technologies introduces automation, potentially rendering certain jobs obsolete and emphasizing the need for adaptable skills. Employees must not only enhance their academic knowledge but also cultivate versatile soft skills such as adaptability, creativity, and critical thinking to navigate the evolving demands of the workplace."
  3. Quoted text: "Therefore, people have to prepare well for their both professional skills and soft skills to meet the requirements of their organization. Firstly, they must have self-studied skills. The world changing dramatically and it always has new things so they have to study every day, everywhere. In the future, they will appreciate what they learned in the past. Secondly, teamwork skills also essential. We are working in an organization so teamwork is regular, even every day. Additionally, teamwork helps others improve many aspects such as problem-solving, critical thinking and communication."

    • Explanation and Improvement Suggestions: The paragraph emphasizes the importance of self-study and teamwork skills, but it lacks depth and specific examples. Provide concrete instances of how self-study and teamwork contribute to skill development and workplace success.
    • Improved example: "Individuals must meticulously hone both their professional and soft skills to align with organizational requirements. For instance, cultivating self-study habits ensures continuous learning in a rapidly changing world. This commitment to learning guarantees that individuals remain abreast of emerging trends, fostering a proactive approach to professional development. Additionally, teamwork, a cornerstone of organizational success, enhances problem-solving, critical thinking, and communication skills, ultimately fortifying an individual’s readiness for future challenges."

Overall, the essay adequately addresses the task but needs more specificity and depth in discussing reasons and measures for preparing for the future of work. Providing concrete examples and expanding on ideas will contribute to a more nuanced and well-supported argument.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a fair level of coherence and cohesion. It logically organizes information and ideas with a clear overall progression. The introduction and conclusion provide a sense of unity to the essay. The use of cohesive devices is effective, although there are instances of faulty or mechanical cohesion within and between sentences. Paragraphing is generally logical, but there are a few instances where it could be improved for better clarity.

How to improve:

  1. Cohesive Devices: Ensure the use of cohesive devices is more nuanced. Some sentences feel mechanically connected, and a more varied and precise use of linking words would enhance cohesion.
  2. Referencing and Substitution: The essay could benefit from more effective referencing and substitution to avoid repetition and improve overall coherence.
  3. Logical Paragraphing: While paragraphing is generally logical, there are areas where it could be refined for better organization. Ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic and follows a coherent structure.
  4. Sentence Structure: Work on the structure of sentences to enhance clarity and eliminate potential confusion.

Overall, a solid effort, but attention to these aspects will help elevate the coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, with attempts to use less common vocabulary. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The use of "digitals" instead of "digital" and "self-studied skills" could be refined. Additionally, there are occasional errors in word formation and spelling, such as "soft skills so that they can perform their abilities better." The essay communicates the message, but the language use could be more precise.

How to improve:

  1. Refine Vocabulary: Aim for more precise and accurate word choices. For example, replace "digitals" with "digital" and consider alternatives for "self-studied skills" to convey the idea more fluently.
  2. Proofread for Errors: Pay attention to word formation and spelling. In the mentioned sentence, revise to "soft skills so that they can enhance their abilities."
  3. Enhance Collocation: Work on improving the combination of words in sentences. Ensure that phrases flow naturally and convey the intended meaning without ambiguity.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, contributing to a varied structure. There is a reasonable attempt to use a variety of complex structures, though some sentences lack clarity due to grammatical errors. The essay contains occasional errors in grammar and punctuation, but these errors rarely impede communication. The use of vocabulary is adequate, but there is room for improvement in precision and variety.

How to improve:

  1. Grammar and Punctuation: Pay closer attention to grammar and punctuation to ensure more accuracy. Review sentence structures to eliminate errors and enhance clarity.
  2. Vocabulary: Work on expanding your vocabulary to include more varied and precise words. This will add depth to your writing and contribute to a higher band score.
  3. Complex Sentence Structures: While attempting complex sentence structures, make sure they enhance the overall coherence of the essay. Ensure that the complexity does not compromise clarity.

Note: While the essay demonstrates an understanding of the topic and provides relevant points, improvements in grammar, punctuation, and vocabulary are essential to achieve a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

It is evident that the world of work is undergoing significant changes, and employees can no longer depend on having the same job or working conditions throughout their lives. There are several reasons for this shift, along with various measures that employees can adopt to prepare for the future of work.

Firstly, let’s discuss the reasons behind this transformation. With the advancement of digital technology, new tools are emerging that impact both our professional and personal lives. This technological innovation may replace certain jobs, enabling businesses to save time and money. Consequently, employees need to enhance not only their academic knowledge but also their soft skills to effectively utilize their abilities. In fields such as technology or industry, workers face heightened pressure due to continuous changes required to meet market demands.

To adequately prepare for the future, individuals must focus on both professional and soft skills. Firstly, they should cultivate self-study skills. The world is evolving rapidly, introducing new concepts and technologies regularly. Therefore, individuals must commit to daily learning to stay abreast of these changes. The knowledge gained through continuous learning will prove valuable in the future. Secondly, teamwork skills are equally essential. In any organizational setting, teamwork is a regular and integral aspect of daily operations. Additionally, teamwork fosters improvement in problem-solving, critical thinking, and communication skills.

In conclusion, as discussed earlier, the world is undergoing continuous change, necessitating that employees enhance their skills to meet evolving demands. By focusing on self-study and teamwork skills, individuals can position themselves to perform effectively in their ever-changing work environments.

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