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These days, many students or teenagers rely on AI-powered tools for study or work, which loses their creativity and autonomy. To what extent, do you agree or disagree

These days, many students or teenagers rely on AI-powered tools for study or work, which loses their creativity and autonomy. To what extent, do you agree or disagree

In today’s society, there are an increasing number of teenagers count on AI-based tools for studying or working purposes. In my opinion, I firmly believe that while these tools can offer substantial benefits, the concerns that they might undermine creativity and autonomyin the long run are far more compelling.
There are several merits associated with the development of AI devices. Chief among these is the flexibility and convenience accompanied with technoligical use in study or work. This assistance can be particularly valuable in managing workloads and accessing information efficiently within a click. For instance, AI equipment can help students get the hang of complex topics and online materials at their comfort zones. Moreover, the young have the authority to manage their tasks and decide whenever they will study or work, which allows them to work in the best condition.
Despite the aforementioned benefit, I am convinced that the reliance on AI-powered equipment may lead to a loss in creativity and autonomy. When students depend excessively on these tools, they may lose the ability to think independently and innovatively. For example, the availability of ready-made content can reduce creativity, as teenagers might lean towards reference ideas rather than generating their own concepts. Similarly, excessive dependence on AI can diminish autonomy since the youth might struggle with decision-making and self- learning.
In conclusion, although it is undeniable that AI tool equip learners with flexibility and convenience, I am of the opinion that the drawbacks of this phenomenon, including the reduction of creativity and autonomy, is much more subtantial.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "In today’s society" -> "In contemporary society"
    Explanation: "Contemporary" is a more precise and formal term than "today’s," which is somewhat colloquial and vague in an academic context.

  2. "count on" -> "rely on"
    Explanation: "Rely on" is a more formal and precise term than "count on," which is somewhat informal and less commonly used in academic writing.

  3. "I firmly believe" -> "I am convinced"
    Explanation: "I am convinced" is a more formal expression suitable for academic writing, whereas "I firmly believe" can sound slightly informal and personal.

  4. "substantial benefits" -> "significant benefits"
    Explanation: "Significant" is more academically appropriate than "substantial," which can imply a larger quantity rather than importance.

  5. "technoligical" -> "technological"
    Explanation: This is a spelling error that should be corrected to "technological" for accuracy and professionalism.

  6. "within a click" -> "with a single click"
    Explanation: "With a single click" is more precise and formal, enhancing the academic tone.

  7. "get the hang of" -> "become familiar with"
    Explanation: "Become familiar with" is more formal and precise than "get the hang of," which is colloquial.

  8. "at their comfort zones" -> "in their comfort zones"
    Explanation: "In their comfort zones" is the correct prepositional phrase, enhancing grammatical accuracy.

  9. "the authority to manage" -> "the autonomy to manage"
    Explanation: "Autonomy" is the correct term for the ability to make decisions independently, which is more specific and formal than "authority."

  10. "whenever they will study or work" -> "at their discretion"
    Explanation: "At their discretion" is a more formal and concise way to express the idea of flexibility in decision-making.

  11. "work in the best condition" -> "work optimally"
    Explanation: "Work optimally" is a more precise and formal expression than "work in the best condition," which is vague and informal.

  12. "Despite the aforementioned benefit" -> "Despite the aforementioned benefits"
    Explanation: "Benefits" should be plural to match the plural subject "merits."

  13. "subtantial" -> "substantial"
    Explanation: Corrects a spelling error for accuracy and professionalism.

  14. "AI tool equip" -> "AI tools equip"
    Explanation: "Tools" should be plural to match the context of multiple devices being discussed.

These changes enhance the formal tone and precision of the essay, aligning it more closely with academic writing standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses the prompt by presenting a balanced view on the use of AI tools among students. The introduction clearly states the writer’s opinion, acknowledging both the benefits and drawbacks of AI in education. The first body paragraph discusses the advantages of AI, such as flexibility and convenience, while the second body paragraph focuses on the potential negative impacts on creativity and autonomy. This dual perspective demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer could consider providing more specific examples or statistics to support the claims made about the benefits and drawbacks of AI tools. Additionally, explicitly stating the extent of agreement or disagreement in the conclusion could strengthen the overall argument.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position throughout, with the writer consistently expressing a belief that the drawbacks of AI tools outweigh their benefits. Phrases like "I firmly believe" and "I am convinced" reinforce the writer’s stance. However, the essay could benefit from a more explicit acknowledgment of the extent to which the writer agrees or disagrees with the statement in the prompt.
    • How to improve: To improve clarity, the writer could reiterate their position more explicitly in the conclusion, perhaps by stating "I strongly disagree with the notion that AI tools are wholly beneficial" or similar phrasing. This would solidify the position and provide a stronger closure to the argument.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports ideas effectively, particularly in the discussion of how AI tools can enhance flexibility and convenience. The writer provides relevant examples, such as the ability to manage workloads and access information easily. However, the support for the negative impacts on creativity and autonomy could be more robust, as it relies on general statements rather than specific examples or evidence.
    • How to improve: To strengthen the support for ideas, the writer should include more concrete examples or case studies that illustrate the loss of creativity and autonomy due to AI reliance. For instance, citing studies that show a decline in creative problem-solving skills among students who frequently use AI tools could provide compelling evidence.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic throughout, addressing the implications of AI tools on students’ creativity and autonomy. The writer does not deviate from the main argument, maintaining relevance to the prompt. However, some sentences could be more concise to enhance clarity and focus.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should aim for conciseness in their arguments. For example, the phrase "the young have the authority to manage their tasks and decide whenever they will study or work" could be simplified to "students can manage their tasks and choose when to study." This would help keep the writing direct and on-topic.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the prompt and presents a well-structured argument. With some enhancements in examples, clarity of position, and conciseness, the essay could achieve an even higher score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear position on the topic and follows a logical structure. The introduction effectively outlines the writer’s stance, while the body paragraphs each address specific points related to the advantages and disadvantages of AI tools. For example, the first body paragraph discusses the benefits of AI, such as flexibility and convenience, while the second body paragraph counters this by discussing the potential negative impacts on creativity and autonomy. However, the transition between the two body paragraphs could be smoother, as the shift from benefits to drawbacks feels somewhat abrupt.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that signal a shift in focus, such as "On the other hand" or "Conversely," at the beginning of the second body paragraph. Additionally, ensuring that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea can further aid in guiding the reader through the argument.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay utilizes paragraphs effectively, with each paragraph dedicated to a distinct aspect of the argument. The introduction sets the stage for the discussion, and the conclusion succinctly summarizes the writer’s viewpoint. However, the body paragraphs could benefit from more balanced development. The first paragraph is somewhat longer and more detailed than the second, which may lead to an imbalance in the overall argument.
    • How to improve: Strive for a more balanced approach by ensuring that both body paragraphs are developed equally. This can be achieved by expanding on the points made in the second paragraph with additional examples or explanations. For instance, when discussing the loss of creativity, consider providing a specific example of how this might manifest in a student’s work or studies.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable use of cohesive devices, such as conjunctions and linking words, to connect ideas within and between sentences. Phrases like "for instance" and "despite the aforementioned benefit" help to clarify relationships between points. However, the range of cohesive devices used is somewhat limited, and there are instances where repetition occurs, such as the frequent use of "AI tools" and "students."
    • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as "furthermore," "in addition," or "however," to enhance the flow of ideas. Additionally, varying the vocabulary used to refer to AI tools and students can help maintain reader interest and avoid redundancy. For example, using synonyms or pronouns can create a more engaging reading experience.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument, attention to the flow of ideas, balance in paragraph development, and the variety of cohesive devices can further elevate the quality of the writing.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms such as "AI-powered tools," "creativity," "autonomy," and "flexibility." However, the use of vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, particularly in phrases like "AI tools" and "AI equipment," which could be varied to enhance the richness of the language. Additionally, phrases like "the young" and "the youth" could be replaced with more specific terms to avoid vagueness.
    • How to improve: To enhance lexical variety, the writer could incorporate synonyms and related terms. For example, instead of repeatedly using "AI tools," alternatives like "artificial intelligence applications" or "digital learning aids" could be employed. Furthermore, using more descriptive adjectives or adverbs could add depth to the arguments presented.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains instances of imprecise vocabulary usage. For example, the phrase "get the hang of complex topics" is informal and may not convey the intended academic tone. Additionally, "the authority to manage their tasks" is somewhat vague; it could be clearer if phrased as "the ability to organize their tasks independently."
    • How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should aim to use more formal and specific language. For instance, instead of "get the hang of," a more precise phrase like "understand" or "master" could be used. Additionally, clarifying terms and avoiding vague expressions will strengthen the overall argument and clarity of the essay.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "technoligical" (should be "technological") and "subtantial" (should be "substantial"). These errors detract from the professionalism of the writing and can affect the reader’s understanding.
    • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should implement a proofreading strategy, such as reading the essay aloud or using spell-check tools. Additionally, practicing commonly misspelled words and familiarizing oneself with the correct spelling of key vocabulary related to the topic can help reduce errors in future essays.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear argument, improvements in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling will enhance the overall quality and coherence of the writing. By incorporating more varied and precise language and ensuring spelling accuracy, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in Lexical Resource.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, the use of the complex sentence "While these tools can offer substantial benefits, the concerns that they might undermine creativity and autonomy in the long run are far more compelling" effectively conveys a nuanced opinion. However, there are instances of repetitive structures, particularly in the second paragraph, where several sentences begin with "This assistance can be…" and "Moreover, the young have…". This repetition can detract from the overall sophistication of the writing.
    • How to improve: To enhance the range of structures, the writer could incorporate more varied sentence openings and transition phrases. For instance, instead of starting multiple sentences with "This assistance," the writer could use phrases like "Additionally," or "Furthermore," to introduce new ideas. Experimenting with different sentence types, such as conditional sentences or using participial phrases, would also contribute to a more dynamic writing style.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a generally good command of grammar, but there are notable errors that affect clarity and accuracy. For example, the phrase "there are an increasing number of teenagers count on AI-based tools" should be corrected to "there is an increasing number of teenagers who count on AI-based tools." Additionally, the phrase "the concerns that they might undermine creativity and autonomyin the long run" contains a typographical error ("autonomyin" should be "autonomy in"). Punctuation is mostly accurate, but the essay could benefit from clearer separation of ideas, particularly in longer sentences.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and ensure that relative clauses are correctly formed. Regular proofreading for typographical errors and punctuation can also help enhance clarity. It may be beneficial to practice writing complex sentences with appropriate punctuation, ensuring that clauses are clearly separated and that the overall flow of ideas remains coherent.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical range and accuracy, there are areas for improvement. By diversifying sentence structures and enhancing grammatical precision, the writer can aim for a higher band score in future essays.

Bài sửa mẫu

In contemporary society, there is an increasing number of teenagers who rely on AI-powered tools for studying or working purposes. In my opinion, I am convinced that while these tools can offer significant benefits, the concerns that they might undermine creativity and autonomy in the long run are far more compelling.

There are several merits associated with the development of AI devices. Chief among these is the flexibility and convenience that comes with technological use in study or work. This assistance can be particularly valuable in managing workloads and accessing information efficiently with a single click. For instance, AI tools can help students become familiar with complex topics and online materials in their comfort zones. Moreover, young individuals have the autonomy to manage their tasks and decide when they will study or work, which allows them to work optimally.

Despite the aforementioned benefits, I am convinced that the reliance on AI-powered tools may lead to a loss of creativity and autonomy. When students depend excessively on these tools, they may lose the ability to think independently and innovatively. For example, the availability of ready-made content can reduce creativity, as teenagers might lean towards referencing ideas rather than generating their own concepts. Similarly, excessive dependence on AI can diminish autonomy since young people might struggle with decision-making and self-learning.

In conclusion, although it is undeniable that AI tools equip learners with flexibility and convenience, I am of the opinion that the drawbacks of this phenomenon, including the reduction of creativity and autonomy, are much more substantial.

Bài viết liên quan

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more…

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