Write your answer in about 100 words. You see this announcement on an English-language website. Homework We’d like to publish articles by students about homework. Why do teachers want their students to do homework? Do students get too much homework? Should students have longer school days instead of doing homework? Write an article answering these questions. We’ll publish the best ones on our website.

Write your answer in about 100 words.
You see this announcement on an English-language website.
Homework
We'd like to publish articles by students about homework. Why do teachers want their students to do homework? Do students get too much homework? Should students have longer school days instead of doing homework?
Write an article answering these questions. We'll publish the best ones on our website.

No students want to do homework. Especially Asian students have to do too much homework. Their teachers think that is a good way for students to remember and revision the lessons. In my opinion, students from primary school to high school sometimes must get too much homework. Going to school 8 hours a day so they need more time to relax. I think it's better to do homework than to have a longer school day Homework also helps them learns more other things that they do not have time to the study in class


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "No students want to do homework." -> "Few students wish to complete their homework."
    Explanation: The phrase "Few students wish to complete their homework" is more precise and formal than "No students want to do homework," which is overly simplistic and informal. The use of "wish" instead of "want" also softens the tone, aligning better with academic language.

  2. "Especially Asian students have to do too much homework." -> "Notably, Asian students are often assigned an excessive amount of homework."
    Explanation: "Notably" is a more formal transition than "Especially," and "are often assigned an excessive amount of homework" is more specific and formal than "have to do too much homework," which is vague and informal.

  3. "Their teachers think that is a good way for students to remember and revision the lessons." -> "Their teachers believe that this approach enhances students’ retention of the lessons."
    Explanation: "Believe" is more formal than "think," and "enhances students’ retention of the lessons" is more precise and academically appropriate than "remember and revision the lessons," which is grammatically incorrect and too casual.

  4. "In my opinion, students from primary school to high school sometimes must get too much homework." -> "In my opinion, students from primary to high school often receive excessive homework assignments."
    Explanation: "Receive excessive homework assignments" is more specific and formal than "get too much homework," and "often" is more precise than "sometimes," which is vague.

  5. "Going to school 8 hours a day so they need more time to relax." -> "Attending school for eight hours daily necessitates additional time for relaxation."
    Explanation: "Attending school for eight hours daily" is more formal and precise than "Going to school 8 hours a day," and "necessitates additional time for relaxation" is more formal and academically appropriate than "need more time to relax."

  6. "I think it’s better to do homework than to have a longer school day" -> "I advocate for homework over an extended school day"
    Explanation: "I advocate for" is a more formal expression than "I think it’s better," and "an extended school day" is more precise than "a longer school day."

  7. "Homework also helps them learns more other things that they do not have time to the study in class" -> "Homework also enables students to learn additional concepts not covered in class."
    Explanation: "Enables students to learn additional concepts not covered in class" is grammatically correct and more formal than "Homework also helps them learns more other things that they do not have time to the study in class," which is awkwardly phrased and grammatically incorrect.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by touching on the reasons teachers assign homework and the concern regarding the amount of homework students receive. However, it does not fully explore the question about whether students should have longer school days instead of doing homework. The response is somewhat limited and lacks depth in discussing all aspects of the prompt.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should ensure that all parts of the question are addressed. This can be achieved by explicitly stating opinions on each of the three questions posed in the prompt. For example, the writer could include a sentence discussing the potential benefits or drawbacks of extending school hours as an alternative to homework.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a position that students have too much homework, but this position is not consistently maintained throughout the text. The statement about homework being beneficial is somewhat contradictory to the earlier claim that students have too much homework, which may confuse the reader about the writer’s stance.
    • How to improve: To improve clarity, the writer should aim for a more consistent position. This can be done by clearly stating their opinion at the beginning and reinforcing it throughout the essay. For instance, if the writer believes that homework is necessary but should be limited, they should articulate this clearly and provide supporting arguments that align with this view.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The ideas presented in the essay are somewhat underdeveloped. While the writer mentions that homework helps students learn, they do not provide specific examples or elaborate on how it aids learning. The essay lacks detailed explanations or evidence to support the claims made, which weakens the overall argument.
    • How to improve: To strengthen the presentation and support of ideas, the writer should include specific examples or reasons that illustrate their points. For instance, they could mention how homework reinforces classroom learning or provides opportunities for independent study. Additionally, expanding on the idea of relaxation time could help clarify the argument regarding the balance between homework and school hours.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, discussing homework and its implications for students. However, the lack of depth in addressing all parts of the prompt means that some relevant aspects are not fully explored. The mention of "relaxation time" is somewhat vague and could be more directly tied to the discussion of homework versus longer school days.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus and relevance, the writer should ensure that each point made directly relates back to the questions in the prompt. This could involve explicitly linking the discussion of homework to the potential need for longer school days, thereby creating a more cohesive argument that directly answers all parts of the prompt.

Overall, to improve the essay and potentially raise the band score, the writer should aim for a more comprehensive exploration of the prompt, maintain a consistent position, provide detailed support for their ideas, and ensure that all points made are relevant to thetopic at hand. Additionally, addressing the word count requirement is crucial, as being under the word limit may significantly impact the overall score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 5

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a few ideas regarding homework, but the organization is somewhat disjointed. For instance, the initial statement about students not wanting to do homework is not effectively linked to the subsequent points about the reasons teachers assign homework and the comparison of homework to longer school days. The flow of ideas lacks a clear progression, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument logically.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, the writer should outline their main points before writing. A clear introduction stating the main argument, followed by distinct paragraphs for each question posed in the prompt, would help. For example, the essay could start with a brief introduction about the general sentiment towards homework, followed by a paragraph discussing teachers’ perspectives, another on the amount of homework, and a final one comparing homework with longer school days.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay is written as a single block of text, which affects readability and clarity. Effective paragraphing is crucial for separating different ideas and allowing the reader to digest information more easily. In this case, the lack of paragraphs makes it challenging to identify where one idea ends and another begins.
    • How to improve: The writer should use separate paragraphs for each main idea. For example, one paragraph could address why teachers assign homework, another could discuss the potential overload of homework, and a third could evaluate the alternative of longer school days. Each paragraph should begin with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea of that section.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay uses a limited range of cohesive devices, which affects the overall coherence. For instance, phrases like "In my opinion" and "I think" are repeated, but there are few transitions that connect sentences and ideas smoothly. The lack of cohesive devices makes the writing feel abrupt and disconnected.
    • How to improve: To improve the use of cohesive devices, the writer should incorporate a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas. For example, using "Furthermore" to add information, "However" to present a contrasting point, or "For instance" to provide examples would enhance the flow. Additionally, ensuring that each sentence logically follows from the previous one will create a more cohesive argument.

Overall, while the essay touches on relevant points regarding homework, improving the organization, paragraphing, and use of cohesive devices will significantly enhance coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a basic range of vocabulary related to the topic of homework, such as "homework," "teachers," "students," and "school day." However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive and lacks variation. For instance, the term "homework" is used multiple times without synonyms or related terms to enhance the richness of the language. Phrases like "too much homework" and "longer school day" could be expressed in different ways to show a broader lexical range.
    • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, consider incorporating synonyms and related expressions. For example, instead of repeating "homework," you could use "assignments," "studies," or "academic tasks." Additionally, using phrases like "excessive workload" or "extended school hours" can diversify the vocabulary and make the writing more engaging.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: There are instances of imprecise vocabulary usage in the essay. For example, the phrase "remember and revision the lessons" is awkward; "revision" should be "revise." The sentence "Homework also helps them learns more other things" contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, which detracts from clarity. The use of "must get too much homework" is also vague and could be expressed more clearly.
    • How to improve: Focus on using vocabulary that accurately conveys your intended meaning. For instance, revise the phrase to "helps them learn additional material" instead of "learns more other things." Additionally, ensure subject-verb agreement; "helps them learn" is correct rather than "helps them learns." Proofreading for grammatical accuracy will also enhance precision.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "revision" (which should be "revise") and "the study" (which should be "study"). These errors can distract the reader and detract from the overall quality of the writing. While the spelling of common words is generally accurate, these mistakes indicate a need for careful proofreading.
    • How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, consider implementing a proofreading strategy. After writing, take a moment to read through the essay slowly, checking for spelling errors. Additionally, using spell-check tools or writing practice apps can help reinforce correct spelling. Regular reading can also enhance spelling skills by familiarizing you with word forms and structures.

By addressing these areas—expanding vocabulary range, improving precision, and enhancing spelling accuracy—you can work towards achieving a higher band score in Lexical Resource for future IELTS essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures. Most sentences are simple or compound, lacking more complex structures that could enhance the writing. For example, the sentence "No students want to do homework" is straightforward and lacks variation. Additionally, the use of phrases like "I think it’s better to do homework than to have a longer school day" shows some complexity, but overall, the essay relies heavily on basic sentence forms.
    • How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer should incorporate more complex sentences, such as those using subordinate clauses (e.g., "Although many students dislike homework, it can be beneficial for their learning"). Additionally, varying the sentence beginnings and using different conjunctions can help create a more engaging and sophisticated writing style.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For instance, "their teachers think that is a good way for students to remember and revision the lessons" should be corrected to "their teachers think that it is a good way for students to remember and revise the lessons." The phrase "Going to school 8 hours a day so they need more time to relax" is a fragment and lacks a main clause, which makes it unclear. Additionally, there is a missing period before "Homework also helps them learns more other things," leading to a run-on sentence.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should review subject-verb agreement and ensure that all sentences are complete. Practicing the use of conjunctions and transitional phrases can help create more coherent and grammatically correct sentences. Furthermore, careful proofreading for punctuation errors, such as ensuring proper sentence endings and avoiding run-ons, will enhance overall clarity and professionalism in writing.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a basic understanding of the topic but requires significant improvement in both grammatical range and accuracy to achieve a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

Few students wish to complete their homework. Notably, Asian students are often assigned an excessive amount of homework. Their teachers believe that this approach enhances students’ retention of the lessons. In my opinion, students from primary to high school frequently receive too many homework assignments. Attending school for eight hours daily necessitates additional time for relaxation. I advocate for homework over an extended school day, as it allows students to reinforce their learning. Additionally, homework enables students to explore concepts not covered in class, thereby enriching their educational experience.

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