In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast food. Many people think that it is good to eat traditional foods while others believe that fast food is a good choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In today’s world, the debate on whether we should choose fast food or traditional to eat has prompted significant discussion. While some advocate for eating conventional foods, others contend that fast food merits further consideration. This essay will examine both perspectives, but I firmly believe that traditional foods are superior because they are more cultural and healthier.

First, it cannot be denied that fast food provides exceptional convenience for us. In today’s fast-paced world, we tend to prefer an option that is quick and easy to fit for our busy schedules. Fast food requires a short amount of time to prepare, and we do not even have to wash the dishes after eating. Additionally, fast food has gradually gained higher coverage among countries. To illustrate, we can find well-known fast food chains like KFC, Burger King in most cities in the world. Offering similar tastes among all locations can satisfy the taste needs of certain food consumers.

On the other hand, local cuisine offers greater nutritional value, enabling consumers to stimulate their well-being. For instance, it possesses a great variety of food substances such as fruits and vegetables, carbohydrates, protein, diary, and fat. All of this can help maintain a healthy lifestyle which can have a knock-on effect on the longer lifespan of residents in a country. Furthermore, consuming traditional dishes is also a way to preserve the long-lasting culture of each nation because of their uniqueness and specialty in each type of food. For example, when mentioning Pho or Banh my, Vietnam will pop up in their heads. Correspondingly, talking about sushi, most people would think of Japan as an origin for this mouth-watering specialty.

To conclude, while fast food provides paramount convenience, I support choosing local cuisine as a way to promote diverse cultures and long-term well being.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"In today’s world" -> "In the contemporary world"
Explanation: "In the contemporary world" is a more formal and precise phrase that enhances the academic tone of the essay.
"choose fast food or traditional to eat" -> "opt for fast food or traditional cuisine"
Explanation: "Opt for" is more formal than "choose," and "traditional cuisine" is a more precise term than "traditional to eat," which is vague and informal.
"prompted significant discussion" -> "elicited considerable debate"
Explanation: "Elicited considerable debate" is a more formal expression that better suits academic writing, emphasizing the nature of the discussion.
"I firmly believe" -> "I strongly contend"
Explanation: "I strongly contend" is a more assertive and academically appropriate phrase than "I firmly believe," which can sound overly personal and less formal.
"exceptional convenience" -> "distinct advantages"
Explanation: "Distinct advantages" is a more precise term that avoids the colloquialism of "exceptional convenience," aligning better with formal academic language.
"quick and easy to fit for our busy schedules" -> "convenient for our busy schedules"
Explanation: "Convenient for our busy schedules" is a more natural and formal way to express the idea, avoiding the awkward construction of "quick and easy to fit for."
"requires a short amount of time to prepare" -> "requires minimal preparation time"
Explanation: "Requires minimal preparation time" is a more concise and formal expression, improving the academic tone of the sentence.
"we do not even have to wash the dishes after eating" -> "no dishwashing is required"
Explanation: "No dishwashing is required" is a more concise and formal way to convey the same information, avoiding the conversational tone of "we do not even have to wash the dishes after eating."
"has gradually gained higher coverage among countries" -> "has increasingly gained global popularity"
Explanation: "Has increasingly gained global popularity" is a more precise and formal way to describe the spread of fast food chains across countries.
"Offering similar tastes among all locations" -> "Offering consistent flavors across all locations"
Explanation: "Offering consistent flavors across all locations" is a more precise and formal way to describe the consistency of taste in fast food chains.
"can satisfy the taste needs of certain food consumers" -> "can meet the culinary preferences of some consumers"
Explanation: "Can meet the culinary preferences of some consumers" is a more formal and precise phrase that avoids the awkward construction of "taste needs of certain food consumers."
"possesses a great variety of food substances" -> "contains a diverse range of nutritional elements"
Explanation: "Contains a diverse range of nutritional elements" is a more precise and scientifically appropriate term than "possesses a great variety of food substances," which is vague and informal.
"All of this can help maintain a healthy lifestyle" -> "This diversity of nutrients contributes to a healthy lifestyle"
Explanation: "This diversity of nutrients contributes to a healthy lifestyle" is a more direct and academically appropriate way to express the impact of nutritional variety on health.
"a way to preserve the long-lasting culture" -> "a means of preserving cultural heritage"
Explanation: "A means of preserving cultural heritage" is a more formal and precise term that better fits the academic context than "a way to preserve the long-lasting culture."
"most people would think of Japan as an origin for this mouth-watering specialty" -> "many associate Japan with this delectable specialty"
Explanation: "Many associate Japan with this delectable specialty" is a more formal and precise way to express the connection between Japan and a specific food item, avoiding the colloquial "mouth-watering."
"paramount convenience" -> "significant convenience"
Explanation: "Significant convenience" is a more neutral and formal term than "paramount," which can imply an exaggerated importance that may not be universally agreed upon in an academic context.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both views regarding traditional foods and fast food. It presents arguments for the convenience of fast food and the nutritional and cultural benefits of traditional foods. However, the discussion of fast food could be more balanced. The essay mentions the convenience of fast food but lacks depth in exploring its potential downsides, such as health implications or environmental concerns. This could lead to a more nuanced view of the topic.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the essay should include a more thorough exploration of the disadvantages of fast food. This could involve discussing health risks associated with fast food consumption, such as obesity or heart disease, and contrasting these with the benefits of traditional foods. Additionally, providing examples of how traditional foods can be made convenient could strengthen the argument.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position favoring traditional foods, stating that they are superior due to their cultural significance and health benefits. This position is evident in the conclusion, which reiterates the preference for local cuisine. However, the transition between discussing fast food and traditional foods could be smoother to reinforce the stance.
- How to improve: To maintain a clearer position, the writer could use transitional phrases that explicitly connect the advantages of traditional foods back to the main argument. For instance, after discussing fast food, a sentence could be added to transition into the benefits of traditional foods, emphasizing how these benefits counter the convenience of fast food.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas clearly, particularly in the section discussing traditional foods. It effectively supports the claim that traditional foods are healthier and culturally significant with specific examples like Pho and sushi. However, the support for the fast food argument is less robust, lacking specific examples or data to illustrate its convenience or popularity.
- How to improve: To strengthen the support for ideas, the writer should include more specific examples and data related to fast food. For instance, citing statistics on the growth of fast food chains or discussing the impact of fast food on lifestyle choices could provide a more compelling argument. Additionally, elaborating on the cultural aspects of traditional foods with more examples would enhance the overall argument.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the debate between fast food and traditional foods. However, some sentences, particularly in the fast food section, could be seen as slightly off-topic, as they focus more on the global presence of fast food chains rather than their impact on health or culture.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that every point made directly relates back to the prompt. Instead of discussing the global presence of fast food chains, the essay could focus on how this presence affects local eating habits or health outcomes. Keeping each paragraph tightly aligned with the main argument will help reinforce the essay’s relevance to the prompt.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear argument, but it would benefit from deeper analysis, more balanced discussions, and tighter focus on the prompt.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion. The introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion and states the writer’s opinion. The first body paragraph focuses on the advantages of fast food, while the second addresses the benefits of traditional foods. However, the transition between the two perspectives could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing fast food to traditional food feels somewhat abrupt, lacking a clear linking sentence that would guide the reader through the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases at the beginning of the second body paragraph, such as "Conversely" or "In contrast," to signal the shift in focus. Additionally, summarizing the key points of the first paragraph before moving on to the next could help reinforce the argument and make the transition clearer.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, which aids in readability. Each paragraph has a clear main idea, and the content is generally relevant to the topic. However, the second body paragraph could benefit from further development. While it presents valid points about traditional foods, the examples provided (Pho, Banh Mi, and sushi) could be more elaborated to strengthen the argument and provide a clearer connection to the benefits of traditional cuisine.
- How to improve: To improve paragraph effectiveness, consider expanding on the examples given in the second body paragraph. For instance, explain why Pho is significant to Vietnamese culture or how it contributes to a healthy diet. This would not only enhance the depth of the argument but also better illustrate the cultural importance of traditional foods.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable use of cohesive devices, such as "first," "on the other hand," and "to conclude," which help to guide the reader through the argument. However, there is a reliance on a limited range of cohesive devices, which can make the writing feel repetitive. For example, the phrase "it cannot be denied" is somewhat clichéd and could be replaced with a more varied expression.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "additionally," consider alternatives like "furthermore," "moreover," or "in addition." Additionally, using phrases that indicate cause and effect, such as "as a result" or "consequently," could enhance the logical connections between ideas.

Overall, while the essay achieves a solid level of coherence and cohesion, addressing these areas for improvement could elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms like "conventional foods," "nutritional value," and "long-lasting culture." However, the vocabulary could be more varied and sophisticated. For example, the phrase "fast food provides exceptional convenience" is effective, but the use of "exceptional" could be enhanced with alternatives such as "remarkable" or "unparalleled" to show a wider lexical range. Additionally, the phrase "higher coverage among countries" is somewhat vague; a more precise term like "increased prevalence" would better convey the idea.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should actively seek synonyms and related terms during the drafting process. Reading a variety of texts, such as articles or essays on similar topics, can help identify and incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary. Practicing with vocabulary exercises that focus on synonyms and antonyms can also be beneficial.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: While the essay includes some precise vocabulary, there are instances of imprecise usage. For example, the phrase "great variety of food substances" could be more accurately expressed as "diverse range of nutrients." Additionally, the term "diary" appears to be a typographical error for "dairy," which impacts the clarity of the message. The phrase "taste needs of certain food consumers" is also somewhat awkward and could be simplified to "taste preferences of consumers."
- How to improve: To improve precision in vocabulary, the writer should consider the context and connotations of the words chosen. Using a thesaurus can help find more accurate terms, but it is crucial to ensure that the selected words fit the context appropriately. Proofreading for spelling errors and awkward phrasing before submission can also enhance clarity.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains a notable spelling error with the word "diary" instead of "dairy." This mistake detracts from the overall quality of the writing and can confuse readers. Overall, the spelling is mostly accurate, but such errors can negatively impact the impression of lexical resource.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should implement a proofreading strategy that includes reading the essay aloud to catch errors. Utilizing spell-check tools and maintaining a personal list of commonly misspelled words can also be effective. Regular practice with spelling exercises or quizzes can reinforce correct spelling habits.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a satisfactory level of lexical resource, there are opportunities for improvement in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By actively expanding vocabulary, ensuring precise word choice, and implementing effective proofreading strategies, the writer can enhance their performance in this criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, phrases like "While some advocate for eating conventional foods, others contend that fast food merits further consideration" showcase a complex structure that effectively contrasts two viewpoints. However, there are instances of repetitive structures, particularly in the way ideas are introduced and developed. For example, the use of "First," and "On the other hand," while effective, could be supplemented with more varied transitional phrases to enhance the flow of the argument.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more varied introductory phrases and clauses. For example, instead of relying on "First" and "On the other hand," alternatives like "To begin with," "Conversely," or "In contrast" could be used. Additionally, integrating more relative clauses and participial phrases would add complexity and depth to the writing. For instance, instead of saying "Fast food provides exceptional convenience," the writer could say, "Providing exceptional convenience, fast food has become a staple for many in today’s fast-paced society."
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains good grammatical accuracy, but there are a few notable errors. For instance, the phrase "protein, diary, and fat" contains a spelling mistake; "diary" should be "dairy." Additionally, the sentence "To illustrate, we can find well-known fast food chains like KFC, Burger King in most cities in the world" lacks a comma before "in," which could lead to confusion. The use of commas in lists is mostly accurate, but there are moments where additional punctuation could clarify meaning, such as in the sentence "For example, when mentioning Pho or Banh my, Vietnam will pop up in their heads," where "Banh my" should be "Banh Mi" for correct spelling and capitalization.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, the writer should proofread for spelling errors and ensure that all terms are correctly spelled and capitalized. Additionally, practicing the rules of punctuation, particularly with lists and clauses, can help improve clarity. It may be beneficial to review common grammatical structures and punctuation rules, perhaps through targeted exercises or grammar resources, to solidify understanding and application in writing.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical range and accuracy, there is room for improvement in diversifying sentence structures and ensuring grammatical precision. By focusing on these areas, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their writing and potentially achieve a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

In today’s world, the debate on whether we should opt for fast food or traditional cuisine has elicited considerable discussion. While some advocate for eating conventional foods, others contend that fast food merits further consideration. This essay will examine both perspectives, but I strongly contend that traditional foods are superior because they are more cultural and healthier.

First, it cannot be denied that fast food provides exceptional convenience for us. In the contemporary world, we tend to prefer an option that is quick and easy to fit into our busy schedules. Fast food requires minimal preparation time, and we do not even have to wash the dishes after eating. Additionally, fast food has increasingly gained global popularity. To illustrate, we can find well-known fast food chains like KFC and Burger King in most cities around the world. Offering consistent flavors across all locations can meet the culinary preferences of some consumers.

On the other hand, local cuisine offers greater nutritional value, enabling consumers to enhance their well-being. For instance, it contains a diverse range of nutritional elements such as fruits and vegetables, carbohydrates, protein, dairy, and fat. This diversity of nutrients contributes to a healthy lifestyle, which can have a knock-on effect on the longer lifespan of residents in a country. Furthermore, consuming traditional dishes is also a means of preserving the cultural heritage of each nation because of their uniqueness and specialty in each type of food. For example, when mentioning Pho or Banh Mi, Vietnam will pop up in people’s minds. Correspondingly, talking about sushi, many associate Japan with this delectable specialty.

To conclude, while fast food provides significant convenience, I support choosing local cuisine as a way to promote diverse cultures and long-term well-being.