In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is often argued that everybody will no longer pay for printed newspapers or books due to the fact that there will be a wide variety of free online resources. This essay totally disagree with this statement because of the emotional and physical experiences and high-quality contents that those hardcopies offer.

First of all, everyone who love reading can not deny the enjoyment of holding a book or newspaper in their own bare hands. Some even confess that they are addicted to the scent of papers and the tactile sensation of flipping pages which can really motivate them to read more. The absense of digital screen also put reader into a more concentrate state of mind and to deeply immerse themselves in every words and letters on the papers.

Secondly, there is no doubt that printed publications are often issued with high-quality contents that are more trustworthy than the vast amount of information available on the internet. Therefore, when it comes to broadening one's knowledge, people will definitely prefer such reliable sources rather than potentially uncertain online facts and figures. For example, although Wikipedia is known to be the largest free multilingual online encyclopaedia, students are not allowed to use it as a reference for their essays or theses.

In conclusion, despite the increasing development and convinience of online information which are free to access, I firmly believe that there will still be a great number of people willing to pay for the hardcopy versions of books and newspapers due to their sentimental and trustworthy values.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "everybody" -> "everyone"
   Explanation: "Everybody" is a less formal and slightly archaic term. "Everyone" is more commonly used in formal writing and is preferred in academic contexts.

2. "will no longer pay" -> "will cease to pay"
   Explanation: "Will cease to pay" is a more formal and precise expression, suitable for academic writing, compared to the more conversational "will no longer pay."

3. "This essay totally disagree" -> "This essay strongly disagrees"
   Explanation: "Totally disagree" is an informal construction. "Strongly disagrees" is the correct form and maintains the formal tone required in academic writing.

4. "hardcopies" -> "hard copies"
   Explanation: "Hardcopies" is not a standard term. "Hard copies" is the correct phrase, which is widely recognized and used in formal contexts.

5. "everyone who love reading" -> "all readers"
   Explanation: "Everyone who love reading" is awkward and informal. "All readers" is more concise and formal.

6. "can not deny" -> "cannot deny"
   Explanation: "Can not" is a less formal way of expressing negation. "Cannot" is the standard form in formal writing.

7. "bare hands" -> "bare hands"
   Explanation: This is a correct phrase, but it could be clarified to "naked hands" for precision, as "bare" can sometimes imply a lack of clothing, which is not the intended meaning here.

8. "Some even confess" -> "Some individuals even confess"
   Explanation: "Some" is vague and informal; "Some individuals" specifies the type of people being referred to, enhancing the formality of the statement.

9. "absense" -> "absence"
   Explanation: "Absense" is a typographical error. "Absence" is the correct term.

10. "put reader into a more concentrate state of mind" -> "place readers in a more concentrated state of mind"
    Explanation: "Put reader" is grammatically incorrect and lacks plural form. "Place readers" corrects this and "concentrated" is the correct adjective form.

11. "to deeply immerse themselves" -> "to deeply immerse themselves"
    Explanation: This is a correct phrase, but it could be rephrased to "to become deeply immersed" for a more formal tone.

12. "printed publications are often issued with high-quality contents" -> "printed publications frequently contain high-quality content"
    Explanation: "Issued with" is less direct and less formal than "contain," which is the correct verb for describing the inclusion of content in publications.

13. "the vast amount of information available on the internet" -> "the vast amount of information available online"
    Explanation: "On the internet" is redundant as "online" already implies the internet. "Online" is more concise and appropriate in formal writing.

14. "convinience" -> "convenience"
    Explanation: "Convinience" is a typographical error. "Convenience" is the correct spelling.

15. "free to access" -> "freely accessible"
    Explanation: "Free to access" is awkward and less formal. "Freely accessible" is a more natural and formal way to express the idea.

16. "will still be a great number of people" -> "will still be numerous individuals"
    Explanation: "A great number of people" is somewhat informal and vague. "Numerous individuals" is more precise and formal.

These changes enhance the formality, precision, and clarity of the essay, aligning it more closely with academic writing standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

• Answer All Parts of the Question:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by clearly stating a disagreement with the notion that printed newspapers and books will become obsolete due to free online resources. The writer presents a rationale for this position, focusing on emotional and physical experiences as well as the quality of content in printed materials. However, the essay could benefit from a more nuanced exploration of the extent to which the writer agrees or disagrees with the statement. The phrase "totally disagree" suggests a binary stance that may not fully engage with the complexities of the issue.
  • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer could consider acknowledging some merits of online reading, such as accessibility and convenience, before reinforcing their position. This would demonstrate a more balanced view and a deeper engagement with the prompt.

• Present a Clear Position Throughout:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position against the statement throughout, which is commendable. The writer consistently refers back to their main argument regarding the value of printed materials. However, the initial phrasing "totally disagree" could be perceived as overly strong and might benefit from a more measured tone.
  • How to improve: To maintain clarity and consistency, the writer could use phrases like "I largely disagree" or "I believe that" to soften the stance while still firmly supporting their viewpoint. This can help in presenting a more reasoned argument.

• Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents two main ideas: the emotional connection to printed materials and the reliability of their content. The examples provided, such as the enjoyment of physical books and the comparison with Wikipedia, effectively support these points. However, the development of ideas could be more robust. For instance, while the sensory experience of reading is mentioned, it could be elaborated with more examples or anecdotes to strengthen the argument.
  • How to improve: The writer should aim to elaborate on each point with additional examples or data. For instance, discussing studies on reading habits or surveys about preferences for printed versus digital formats could provide more depth and support.

• Stay on Topic:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the value of printed materials in contrast to online resources. However, there are moments where the argument could be more tightly focused. For example, the discussion about the "scent of papers" and "tactile sensation" could be seen as somewhat tangential to the main argument about the future of printed materials.
  • How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that every point made directly relates back to the central argument regarding the future of printed materials. Streamlining the discussion to emphasize how these experiences contribute to the overall argument would enhance coherence.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the prompt and presents a clear position, there are opportunities for improvement in the depth of argumentation, balance in perspective, and focus on the topic. By addressing these areas, the writer could aim for a higher band score in future essays.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

• Organize Information Logically:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear argument against the statement that printed newspapers and books will become obsolete. The introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, and the body paragraphs logically follow, each focusing on a distinct reason supporting the argument. For instance, the first body paragraph discusses the emotional and physical experiences associated with reading printed materials, while the second addresses the reliability of printed content compared to online sources. This logical progression helps the reader follow the writer’s line of reasoning.
  • How to improve: To enhance the logical flow, consider using clearer topic sentences that explicitly state the main idea of each paragraph. For example, the first body paragraph could begin with a sentence that directly connects the enjoyment of physical books to the argument against the decline of printed materials. Additionally, incorporating transitional phrases between points could further improve the coherence of the essay.

• Use Paragraphs:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, which aids in clarity. Each paragraph has a clear focus, and the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points. However, the first body paragraph could benefit from a more structured approach, as it contains multiple ideas that could be better organized into separate sentences or even sub-points.
  • How to improve: To strengthen paragraph structure, ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea. Additionally, consider breaking down complex sentences into simpler ones to enhance readability. For instance, the first body paragraph could be divided into two sentences: one focusing on the sensory experience of reading and another on the concentration benefits of reading printed materials.

• Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "first of all," "secondly," and "therefore," which help to guide the reader through the argument. However, the range of cohesive devices could be expanded. For example, the use of more varied linking words and phrases could enhance the overall flow of the essay. The phrase "this essay totally disagree" could be more effectively expressed as "This essay strongly disagrees," which would improve clarity and cohesion.
  • How to improve: To diversify cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as "in addition," "furthermore," and "conversely." This will not only improve the flow of ideas but also demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency. Additionally, ensure that cohesive devices are used accurately; for example, "the absense" should be corrected to "the absence" to maintain grammatical accuracy.

Overall, the essay demonstrates strong coherence and cohesion, effectively presenting a well-structured argument. By focusing on clearer topic sentences, improving paragraph structure, and diversifying cohesive devices, the writer can further enhance the clarity and effectiveness of their writing.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

• Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with phrases such as "wide variety of free online resources," "high-quality contents," and "tactile sensation of flipping pages." However, there are instances where the vocabulary could be more varied. For example, the terms "high-quality contents" and "trustworthy" are repeated, which limits lexical diversity.
  • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, consider using synonyms or related terms. For instance, instead of repeating "high-quality contents," you could use "premium material" or "reliable information." Additionally, incorporating more advanced vocabulary related to the topic, such as "digitalization" or "tactility," could further enrich the essay.

• Use Vocabulary Precisely:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains some precise vocabulary, such as "emotional and physical experiences" and "tactile sensation." However, there are notable inaccuracies, such as "the absense of digital screen," which should be "absence" and "to deeply immerse themselves in every words and letters," where "words" should be singular ("word") and "letters" is unnecessary. The phrase "concentrate state of mind" is also slightly awkward; "concentrated state of mind" would be more appropriate.
  • How to improve: Focus on ensuring that vocabulary is not only accurate but also contextually appropriate. Proofreading for common errors and using tools like thesauruses can help in selecting the most fitting words. Additionally, practicing writing with a focus on precision can help solidify this skill.

• Use Correct Spelling:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay shows a few spelling errors, such as "absense" (should be "absence") and "convinience" (should be "convenience"). These errors detract from the overall quality of the writing and can lead to misunderstandings.
  • How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, consider implementing a proofreading strategy. Reading the essay aloud can help catch errors, as can using spell-check tools. Additionally, maintaining a personal list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them can be beneficial. Engaging in regular writing exercises that emphasize spelling can also help reinforce correct usage.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of vocabulary, there are areas for improvement in range, precision, and spelling that could elevate the score further.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

• Use a Wide Range of Structures:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, the opening sentence employs a complex structure with a dependent clause ("that everybody will no longer pay for printed newspapers or books…"). Additionally, the use of phrases like "first of all" and "secondly" helps to organize ideas clearly. However, some sentences are overly long or convoluted, which can hinder clarity. For example, the sentence "The absense of digital screen also put reader into a more concentrate state of mind and to deeply immerse themselves in every words and letters on the papers" could be simplified for better readability.
  • How to improve: To diversify sentence structures further, consider incorporating more varied introductory phrases and using a mix of shorter, punchy sentences alongside longer, more complex ones. Additionally, aim to break down overly long sentences into clearer, more concise statements to enhance readability.

• Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from its overall quality. For example, "This essay totally disagree with this statement" should be "This essay totally disagrees with this statement." The phrase "the absense of digital screen" contains a spelling error (should be "absence"), and "put reader" should be "puts readers." Furthermore, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as "everybody will no longer pay" where "everybody" should be treated as singular. Punctuation is generally correct, but there are instances where commas could enhance clarity, particularly in longer sentences.
  • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, it is essential to proofread the essay carefully, focusing on common errors such as subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency. Additionally, practicing grammar exercises that target specific areas of difficulty can be beneficial. For punctuation, reviewing the rules for comma usage, especially in complex sentences, will help clarify meaning and improve the overall flow of the writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

It is often argued that everyone will cease to pay for printed newspapers or books because there will be a wide variety of free online resources available. This essay strongly disagrees with this statement due to the emotional and physical experiences, as well as the high-quality content that hard copies offer.

First of all, everyone who loves reading cannot deny the enjoyment of holding a book or newspaper in their bare hands. Some individuals even confess that they are addicted to the scent of paper and the tactile sensation of flipping pages, which can truly motivate them to read more. The absence of a digital screen also places readers in a more concentrated state of mind, allowing them to deeply immerse themselves in every word and letter on the page.

Secondly, there is no doubt that printed publications frequently contain high-quality content that is more trustworthy than the vast amount of information available online. Therefore, when it comes to broadening one’s knowledge, people will definitely prefer such reliable sources rather than potentially uncertain online facts and figures. For example, although Wikipedia is known to be the largest free multilingual online encyclopedia, students are often discouraged from using it as a reference for their essays or theses.

In conclusion, despite the increasing development and convenience of online information that is freely accessible, I firmly believe that there will still be numerous individuals willing to pay for the hard copy versions of books and newspapers due to their sentimental and trustworthy values.