Some people think that robots and artificial intelligence are important for human’s future development. Others think that robots and artificial intelligence will have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some people think that robots and artificial intelligence are important for human’s future development. Others
think that robots and artificial intelligence will have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your
opinion.
Opinions are divided on whether robots and artificial intelligence (AI) will have detrimental effects on society or play a
crucial role in our future development. Although their application raises certain concerns regarding unemployment, I
believe these technologies are key to our future.
Opponents of robots and AI hold a false belief that these technologies will lead to higher unemployment rates. This thinking
is predicated on the fact that robots and AI have been taking away jobs in various fields, but particularly in manufacturing,
where many factory workers have been made redundant. It is thought that those who fail to secure their jobs then find it
hard to support themselves and their families, and therefore can become a burden to society, potentially hindering the
economy. However, this school of thought is flawed, as robots and AI also create countless job opportunities in other fields
such as information technology and programming. For these reasons, robotic integration should be seen as enabling job
transformation rather than job losses.
Furthermore, robots and AI bring about enormous benefits to our future development. First and foremost, this technology
is able to do repeated manual tasks with greater precision and speed, thereby improving productivity, and at the same time,
this allows more human resources to be diverted to other jobs that require creativity. Another key factor for our future
development is that robots and AI will be able to do jobs that are dangerous or impossible for normal workers. When robots become more sophisticated and equipped with AI, they will be able to completely replace humans in space or deep-sea
exploration missions, not only minimizing the risks to human life but also opening up possibilities for scientific advances.
In conclusion, it is untrue that robots and AI will exacerbate the problem of unemployment due to the fact that they can
create jobs for us. I believe robots and AI play a key role in our future development because they help us improve
productivity and can potentially save lives by doing dangerous jobs.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"Opinions are divided on whether robots and artificial intelligence (AI) will have detrimental effects on society or play a crucial role in our future development." -> "There is a divergence of opinions regarding the potential negative impacts or pivotal role of robots and artificial intelligence (AI) in societal evolution."
Explanation: The suggested revision maintains the original meaning while utilizing more formal language, such as "divergence of opinions" instead of "opinions are divided" and "societal evolution" instead of "our future development." -
"Although their application raises certain concerns regarding unemployment, I believe these technologies are key to our future." -> "While concerns about unemployment accompany their implementation, I assert that these technologies are pivotal to our future."
Explanation: The revised version maintains the intended meaning but employs more formal language, replacing "raises certain concerns" with "concerns accompany" and "I believe" with "I assert." -
"This thinking is predicated on the fact that robots and AI have been taking away jobs in various fields…" -> "This perspective is based on the premise that robots and AI have been displacing jobs across multiple sectors…"
Explanation: The term "predicated" is more formal than "based on," and "displacing" is a more precise term than "taking away." -
"…many factory workers have been made redundant." -> "…many factory workers have become redundant."
Explanation: The term "made redundant" is slightly informal; "become redundant" is a more formal alternative. -
"…can become a burden to society, potentially hindering the economy." -> "…might become a societal burden, potentially impeding economic progress."
Explanation: The suggested revision maintains formality and improves clarity, replacing "a burden to society" with "a societal burden" and "hindering the economy" with "impeding economic progress." -
"…as robots and AI also create countless job opportunities in other fields such as information technology and programming." -> "…since robots and AI also generate numerous employment prospects in alternative sectors such as information technology and programming."
Explanation: The revision employs more formal language, replacing "countless job opportunities" with "numerous employment prospects" and "in other fields" with "in alternative sectors." -
"…robotic integration should be seen as enabling job transformation rather than job losses." -> "…robotic integration should be viewed as facilitating job transformation rather than inducing job losses."
Explanation: The replacement of "enabling" with "facilitating" and "losses" with "inducing" maintains formality while enhancing clarity and precision. -
"…this technology is able to do repeated manual tasks with greater precision and speed…" -> "…this technology can perform repetitive manual tasks with heightened precision and speed…"
Explanation: The revision maintains formality and clarity, replacing "able to do" with "can perform" and "greater" with "heightened." -
"…and at the same time, this allows more human resources to be diverted to other jobs that require creativity." -> "…simultaneously, this facilitates the redirection of human resources towards roles demanding creativity."
Explanation: The suggested revision maintains formality and clarity, replacing "at the same time" with "simultaneously" and "allows" with "facilitates." -
"…robots and AI will be able to do jobs that are dangerous or impossible for normal workers." -> "…robots and AI will be capable of undertaking tasks hazardous or unfeasible for conventional workers."
Explanation: The revised version employs more formal language, replacing "do jobs" with "undertake tasks" and "normal workers" with "conventional workers." -
"…When robots become more sophisticated and equipped with AI, they will be able to completely replace humans in space or deep-sea exploration missions…" -> "…As robots attain greater sophistication and AI integration, they will potentially supplant humans entirely in space or deep-sea exploration missions…"
Explanation: The suggested revision enhances formality and precision, replacing "become more sophisticated" with "attain greater sophistication" and "equipped with AI" with "AI integration." -
"In conclusion, it is untrue that robots and AI will exacerbate the problem of unemployment due to the fact that they can create jobs for us." -> "In conclusion, the notion that robots and AI will exacerbate unemployment is unfounded, given their capacity to generate employment opportunities."
Explanation: The revision maintains formality while enhancing clarity and precision, replacing "it is untrue" with "the notion is unfounded" and "due to the fact that" with "given." -
"I believe robots and AI play a key role in our future development because they help us improve productivity and can potentially save lives by doing dangerous jobs." -> "I contend that robots and AI play a pivotal role in our future development, as they enhance productivity and have the potential to save lives by undertaking hazardous tasks."
Explanation: The suggested revision maintains formality while enhancing clarity and precision, replacing "I believe" with "I contend" and "help us improve" with "enhance."
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8
Band Score for Task Response: 8
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay thoroughly addresses both perspectives outlined in the prompt. It acknowledges the concerns regarding the potential negative impact of robots and AI on society, particularly in terms of unemployment, while also presenting arguments in favor of their importance for future development.
- How to improve: To further enhance task response, the essay could delve deeper into the potential negative effects of robots and AI on society beyond just unemployment, such as ethical considerations, social inequality, or loss of human connection.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear and consistent stance throughout, advocating for the significance of robots and AI in future development despite acknowledging potential concerns.
- How to improve: To strengthen clarity, the essay could explicitly state the author’s opinion earlier in the essay and reinforce it throughout with stronger language, such as "I firmly believe" or "It is evident that."
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively presents and elaborates on ideas, providing examples and reasoning to support its arguments. It discusses the impact of robots and AI on employment and productivity in detail, supported by relevant examples.
- How to improve: To further extend ideas, the essay could explore additional examples or case studies demonstrating the transformative potential of robots and AI beyond the fields mentioned, such as healthcare, education, or environmental sustainability.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains focus on the topic throughout, discussing both views on the role of robots and AI in society and providing a clear opinion.
- How to improve: To ensure continued relevance, the essay could periodically revisit the main points of discussion and avoid tangential arguments or excessive repetition.
Overall, the essay effectively addresses the prompt, presenting well-developed arguments and maintaining coherence and relevance throughout. To enhance the response further, it could deepen the analysis of potential negative impacts and reinforce the clarity of the author’s stance.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a clear logical organization throughout. Each paragraph is devoted to discussing a specific aspect of the topic, starting with an introduction that outlines the two opposing views, followed by body paragraphs that elaborate on each viewpoint, and ending with a concise conclusion that summarizes the author’s opinion. This logical progression aids in the reader’s understanding of the argument presented.
- How to improve: To further enhance logical organization, the author could consider providing smoother transitions between paragraphs. This can be achieved by using transitional phrases or sentences that link ideas between paragraphs, helping to maintain coherence and cohesion.
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Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively utilizes paragraphs to structure the argument. Each paragraph focuses on a distinct aspect of the topic, beginning with an introduction paragraph that sets up the discussion, followed by body paragraphs that delve into the arguments for each viewpoint, and concluding with a succinct summary paragraph. The structure is clear and contributes to the overall coherence of the essay.
- How to improve: While the essay’s paragraphing is generally well-structured, there are a few instances where paragraphs could be further developed to provide more depth to the arguments presented. For example, in the body paragraphs, the author could include additional examples or evidence to support their points, thereby strengthening the overall argumentation.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively employs a range of cohesive devices to connect ideas and ensure smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs. Examples of cohesive devices used include logical connectors such as "although", "furthermore", "in conclusion", and pronouns like "this technology" and "these technologies" to refer back to previously mentioned concepts. These cohesive devices contribute to the overall coherence of the essay and help guide the reader through the argument.
- How to improve: While the essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, the author could further diversify their repertoire of cohesive devices to add variety and sophistication to their writing. This could include incorporating more advanced transitional phrases or using parallel structure to create consistency and flow within sentences and paragraphs. Additionally, ensuring that cohesive devices are used appropriately and sparingly can prevent the writing from becoming repetitive or overly reliant on certain connectors.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7
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Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of vocabulary, employing varied terms such as "detrimental," "redundant," "predicated," "transformation," "sophisticated," and "exacerbate." These choices contribute to the richness and depth of the discussion.
- How to improve: To further enhance lexical resource, consider incorporating more advanced vocabulary related to the topic. For instance, instead of using "key" repeatedly, synonyms like "integral" or "paramount" could be employed to add nuance and sophistication to the arguments presented.
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Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally employs vocabulary with precision, effectively conveying ideas and arguments. For example, the distinction between "job transformation" and "job losses" is articulated clearly, indicating precise vocabulary usage.
- How to improve: To maintain precision, ensure that each term used aligns precisely with the intended meaning. Avoid vague or ambiguous language that could detract from the clarity of the arguments. Additionally, consider utilizing domain-specific terminology where appropriate to convey specialized concepts more accurately.
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Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: Spelling accuracy is generally maintained throughout the essay, with no noticeable errors detracting from readability or comprehension.
- How to improve: To further enhance spelling accuracy, consider implementing proofreading techniques such as spell-checking tools or reading the essay aloud to catch any overlooked errors. Additionally, expanding your vocabulary and familiarity with word structures can reinforce spelling proficiency over time.
Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of lexical resources, effectively utilizing vocabulary to convey complex ideas and arguments. To further improve, continue expanding your vocabulary repertoire, ensuring precise and varied word choices to enhance the overall quality of written expression. Additionally, maintaining consistency in spelling accuracy through diligent proofreading practices will contribute to further refinement in linguistic proficiency.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures, including complex and compound sentences. For instance, the use of conditional sentences ("Although their application raises certain concerns regarding unemployment…") and comparative structures ("this school of thought is flawed, as robots and AI also create countless job opportunities…") enriches the expression and provides depth to the argumentation.
- How to improve: To further enhance the range of structures, consider incorporating more advanced sentence patterns such as inverted sentences, participial phrases, and parallel structures. This can add sophistication to the writing and contribute to a smoother flow of ideas.
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of grammar and punctuation. There are minimal errors observed, with sentences structured correctly and punctuation marks appropriately placed. However, there are a few instances where articles are missing or misused, such as "this thinking is predicated on the fact that robots and AI have been taking away jobs," where "the" before "robots" could enhance clarity.
- How to improve: To maintain consistency and precision, it’s crucial to pay attention to articles, verb agreement, and parallelism throughout the essay. Proofreading carefully for such errors before submission can help ensure grammatical accuracy and coherence in expression. Additionally, considering the use of transitional phrases or conjunctions can further refine the coherence and cohesion of the essay, aiding in the smooth progression of ideas from one paragraph to the next.
Bài sửa mẫu
Opinions are divided regarding the potential negative impacts or crucial role of robots and artificial intelligence (AI) in societal evolution. While concerns about unemployment accompany their implementation, I assert that these technologies are pivotal to our future.
Opponents of robots and AI hold the belief that these technologies will lead to higher unemployment rates. This thinking is based on the fact that robots and AI have been displacing jobs across various sectors, particularly in manufacturing, where many factory workers have become redundant. It is feared that those who lose their jobs may struggle to support themselves and their families, potentially becoming a societal burden and impeding economic progress. However, this perspective is flawed, as robots and AI also generate numerous employment prospects in alternative sectors such as information technology and programming. Therefore, robotic integration should be viewed as facilitating job transformation rather than inducing job losses.
Moreover, robots and AI contribute significantly to our future development. This technology can perform repetitive manual tasks with heightened precision and speed, thereby enhancing productivity. Simultaneously, this facilitates the redirection of human resources towards roles demanding creativity. Another crucial aspect for our future development is that robots and AI will be capable of undertaking tasks hazardous or unfeasible for conventional workers. As robots attain greater sophistication and AI integration, they will potentially supplant humans entirely in space or deep-sea exploration missions, minimizing risks to human life and opening up possibilities for scientific advances.
In conclusion, the notion that robots and AI will exacerbate unemployment is unfounded, given their capacity to generate employment opportunities. I contend that robots and AI play a pivotal role in our future development, as they enhance productivity and have the potential to save lives by undertaking hazardous tasks.
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