The international community should reduce or eliminate the debts of the world’s poorest countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

One school of thought holds that excessive debt repayments have trapped many poor countries in a cycle of poverty, so the international community should intervene by reducing or canceling debts for those countries. While acknowledging that debt forgiveness can serve as a lifeline for these nations, I believe that to solve poverty effectively, a hybrid approach should be considered.

It is understandable why some propose that the international community should help the world’s poorest nations escape the cycle of poverty through debt reduction or elimination. The primary reason is that debt relief could reduce the burden of servicing debt repayments, which more often than not divert resources away from investing in key fields, such as healthcare or education. However, this line of reasoning fails to factor in the fact that debt relief could create moral hazards and discourage financial responsibility, ultimately leading to long-term economic dependency. If these poor countries perceived that debts were not to be paid, they would be more likely to rely on periodic bailouts instead of reforming and addressing their economic problems.

For the aforementioned arguments, I believe that solely reducing or eliminating the debts in the poorest countries cannot solve the root cause of their economic problems. Instead, the international community should lean towards a more nuanced approach in which both partial debt reduction and targeted assistance are combined. First, to better develop the economy in those countries, the debts could be restructured by extending the repayment period, lowering the interest rates or reducing the amount owed, allowing more effective fiscal management. Besides partial debt forgiveness, the international community can promote the financially struggling nations’ economy by applying debt-for-swaps, which permits a portion of debts in exchange for investing in developing other fields. Therefore, in these ways, the international community can not only make the poorest countries accountable for their debts but also help alleviate poverty sustainably.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"One school of thought holds" -> "A prevailing perspective suggests"
Explanation: "A prevailing perspective suggests" is more formal and academically appropriate than "One school of thought holds," which can sound somewhat colloquial and vague.
"excessive debt repayments have trapped" -> "excessive debt repayment burdens have ensnared"
Explanation: "Debt repayment burdens" is a more precise term than "debt repayments," and "ensnared" is a more formal synonym for "trapped," enhancing the academic tone.
"a cycle of poverty" -> "a cycle of poverty and economic stagnation"
Explanation: Adding "economic stagnation" provides a clearer and more specific description of the economic conditions, enhancing the academic rigor of the statement.
"a hybrid approach should be considered" -> "a multifaceted strategy should be adopted"
Explanation: "Multifaceted strategy" is a more precise and formal term than "hybrid approach," which is somewhat vague and less commonly used in academic writing.
"the world’s poorest nations" -> "the most impoverished nations"
Explanation: "Most impoverished nations" is a more precise and formal way to describe the poorest countries, aligning better with academic style.
"divert resources away from" -> "redirect resources from"
Explanation: "Redirect resources from" is a more formal and precise phrase, suitable for academic writing.
"more often than not" -> "frequently"
Explanation: "Frequently" is a more formal and concise alternative to "more often than not," which is somewhat colloquial.
"moral hazards" -> "moral hazard"
Explanation: "Moral hazard" is the correct term, referring to the economic concept, and should not be pluralized.
"perceived that debts were not to be paid" -> "believed that debts were not payable"
Explanation: "Believed that debts were not payable" is more formal and precise, improving the academic tone.
"restructuring the debts" -> "restructuring debt"
Explanation: "Restructuring debt" is more concise and formal, avoiding the unnecessary pluralization of "debts."
"lowering the interest rates or reducing the amount owed" -> "reducing interest rates or the principal amount"
Explanation: "Reducing interest rates or the principal amount" is more specific and formal, improving clarity and precision.
"applying debt-for-swaps" -> "implementing debt-for-equity swaps"
Explanation: "Implementing debt-for-equity swaps" is a more formal and precise term, commonly used in economic and financial contexts.
"make the poorest countries accountable for their debts" -> "hold the poorest countries accountable for their debt obligations"
Explanation: "Hold the poorest countries accountable for their debt obligations" is more formal and specific, emphasizing the responsibility aspect.
"help alleviate poverty sustainably" -> "facilitate sustainable poverty alleviation"
Explanation: "Facilitate sustainable poverty alleviation" is a more formal and academically appropriate phrase, enhancing the precision and formality of the conclusion.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the necessity of debt reduction for the world’s poorest countries while also presenting an alternative view that a hybrid approach is more effective. The writer acknowledges the arguments for debt forgiveness and provides a counterargument about the potential negative consequences of such actions. However, the essay could have more explicitly stated the extent of agreement or disagreement with the idea of debt reduction, which is a key aspect of the prompt.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should clearly articulate their position on the extent to which they agree or disagree with the statement. This could be achieved by explicitly stating their stance in the introduction and reiterating it in the conclusion, ensuring that the reader understands the writer’s viewpoint throughout the essay.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear position that a hybrid approach is preferable to outright debt cancellation. However, the initial acknowledgment of debt relief as a "lifeline" may create some ambiguity regarding the writer’s stance. While the position is generally maintained, the nuances could confuse readers about the writer’s ultimate agreement or disagreement with the prompt.
- How to improve: To maintain a clearer position, the writer should avoid ambiguous phrases and ensure that their main argument is consistently reinforced throughout the essay. Using clear transitional phrases that indicate agreement or disagreement can help guide the reader through the argument.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several well-developed ideas, such as the potential benefits of debt relief and the risks of moral hazard. The writer supports these ideas with logical reasoning and examples, such as the impact of debt servicing on healthcare and education. However, some points could benefit from further elaboration or specific examples to strengthen the argument.
- How to improve: To improve the presentation and support of ideas, the writer could include specific examples or case studies of countries that have experienced either positive or negative outcomes from debt relief. This would provide concrete evidence to back up their claims and enhance the overall persuasiveness of the argument.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the implications of debt reduction for poor countries. However, there are moments where the discussion of moral hazard and economic dependency could be more tightly linked to the main argument about debt relief. Some sentences may stray slightly from the central theme, potentially distracting the reader.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should regularly refer back to the main question and ensure that every point made directly relates to the discussion of debt reduction. Using topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help clarify how each point contributes to the overall argument.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay could achieve a higher band score in the Task Response criteria, ultimately leading to a more compelling and coherent argument.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear and logical progression of ideas. The introduction effectively outlines the main argument and acknowledges opposing views, which sets a solid foundation for the discussion. Each paragraph builds on the previous one, with the first paragraph introducing the problem of debt, the second discussing the potential drawbacks of debt relief, and the third proposing a hybrid solution. This logical flow aids the reader’s understanding and keeps the argument coherent.
- How to improve: To enhance the logical flow further, the writer could consider using more explicit linking phrases between paragraphs. For instance, transitioning from the discussion of debt relief’s drawbacks to the proposed hybrid approach could be strengthened with a phrase like "Despite these concerns, a more balanced solution is necessary." This would help guide the reader more smoothly through the argument.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument. The first paragraph introduces the topic, the second presents counterarguments, and the third outlines the proposed solution. This structure not only aids clarity but also allows the writer to develop each point thoroughly.
- How to improve: While the paragraphing is generally effective, the writer could improve by ensuring that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea. For example, the second paragraph could start with a sentence like, "However, while debt relief has its merits, it also poses significant risks." This would provide a clearer roadmap for the reader and reinforce the paragraph’s focus.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "however," "instead," and "therefore," which help to connect ideas and indicate relationships between them. These devices contribute to the overall coherence of the essay and guide the reader through the argument effectively.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, the writer could incorporate more varied transitional phrases and linking words. For instance, using phrases like "on the other hand," "in addition," or "consequently" can enhance the richness of the text and provide clearer connections between points. Additionally, ensuring that cohesive devices are used appropriately and not repetitively will maintain the reader’s engagement.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of coherence and cohesion, with clear organization, effective paragraphing, and a good range of cohesive devices. By implementing the suggested improvements, the writer can further enhance the clarity and flow of their argument, potentially achieving an even higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, employing terms such as "excessive debt repayments," "cycle of poverty," "debt relief," and "moral hazards." These phrases effectively convey complex ideas and contribute to the overall clarity of the argument. However, there are instances where vocabulary could be more varied. For example, the repeated use of "debt" and "countries" could be replaced with synonyms or paraphrased to enhance lexical diversity.
- How to improve: To improve, consider incorporating synonyms or related terms to avoid repetition. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "debt," terms like "financial obligations" or "liabilities" could be used. Additionally, using phrases like "developing nations" or "economically disadvantaged states" instead of "poor countries" could enrich the vocabulary.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, with terms like "moral hazards" and "fiscal management" correctly applied in context. However, there are moments where the precision could be enhanced. For example, the phrase "periodic bailouts" could be misinterpreted as it lacks a clear definition within the context of the argument. The term "hybrid approach" is also somewhat vague without further clarification.
- How to improve: To enhance precision, consider defining or elaborating on terms that may not be universally understood. For instance, explaining what constitutes a "hybrid approach" in this context would provide clarity. Additionally, ensuring that all terms used are specific to the argument being made will strengthen the overall precision of vocabulary.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors in the text. Words such as "intervene," "acknowledging," and "restructuring" are spelled correctly, which contributes positively to the overall impression of the writing.
- How to improve: While spelling is accurate, it is always beneficial to maintain this standard through regular practice. Engaging in activities such as reading widely and writing frequently can help reinforce correct spelling habits. Additionally, using spell-check tools during the writing process can further ensure accuracy.

Overall, the essay reflects a solid command of lexical resource, achieving a Band 7 score. By focusing on increasing vocabulary range, enhancing precision, and maintaining spelling accuracy, the writer can aim for an even higher score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. Complex sentences are effectively used, as seen in phrases like "While acknowledging that debt forgiveness can serve as a lifeline for these nations, I believe that to solve poverty effectively, a hybrid approach should be considered." This showcases the writer’s ability to convey nuanced ideas. Additionally, the use of conditional structures, such as "If these poor countries perceived that debts were not to be paid," further illustrates the writer’s grammatical range. However, there is a slight over-reliance on complex sentences, which can occasionally lead to convoluted expressions.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more simple and compound sentences to balance the complexity. For instance, breaking down some of the longer sentences into shorter, more direct statements could improve clarity. Additionally, experimenting with different sentence openings (e.g., starting with adverbial phrases or using inversion) could add further variety.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits a high level of grammatical accuracy. Most sentences are well-structured, and punctuation is used correctly, contributing to the overall clarity of the argument. For example, the use of commas in complex sentences is mostly appropriate, as in "However, this line of reasoning fails to factor in the fact that debt relief could create moral hazards and discourage financial responsibility." However, there are minor issues, such as the phrase "the financially struggling nations’ economy," which could be misinterpreted due to the placement of the possessive apostrophe.
- How to improve: To further improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should pay attention to possessive forms and ensure clarity in their use. For example, rephrasing "the financially struggling nations’ economy" to "the economies of financially struggling nations" would eliminate ambiguity. Additionally, a thorough proofreading process could help catch any overlooked errors or awkward phrasing, ensuring that the essay maintains a high standard of grammatical precision.

Overall, the essay is strong in both grammatical range and accuracy, achieving a Band Score of 8. With minor adjustments to sentence structure variety and careful attention to grammatical details, the writer can further enhance the quality of their writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

One school of thought holds that excessive debt repayments have ensnared many poor countries in a cycle of poverty, so the international community should intervene by reducing or canceling debts for those countries. While acknowledging that debt forgiveness can serve as a lifeline for these nations, I believe that to solve poverty effectively, a multifaceted strategy should be considered.

It is understandable why some propose that the international community should help the world’s poorest nations escape the cycle of poverty through debt reduction or elimination. The primary reason is that debt relief could reduce the burden of servicing debt repayments, which more often than not diverts resources away from investing in key fields, such as healthcare or education. However, this line of reasoning fails to factor in the fact that debt relief could create moral hazard and discourage financial responsibility, ultimately leading to long-term economic dependency. If these poor countries believed that debts were not payable, they would be more likely to rely on periodic bailouts instead of reforming and addressing their economic problems.

For the aforementioned arguments, I believe that solely reducing or eliminating the debts of the poorest countries cannot solve the root cause of their economic problems. Instead, the international community should lean towards a more nuanced approach in which both partial debt reduction and targeted assistance are combined. First, to better develop the economy in those countries, the debts could be restructured by extending the repayment period, lowering the interest rates, or reducing the principal amount owed, allowing for more effective fiscal management. Besides partial debt forgiveness, the international community can promote the financially struggling nations’ economies by implementing debt-for-equity swaps, which permit a portion of debts in exchange for investing in developing other fields. Therefore, in these ways, the international community can not only hold the poorest countries accountable for their debt obligations but also facilitate sustainable poverty alleviation.