Some people could be naturally good leaders. Others believe that people can learn leadership skills. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some say that becoming a well-known futuristic leader involves having natural professional leadership abilities. Conversely, people might improve their managerial skills in the long term. Despite the merit that both aspects of thought offer, my personal opinion expresses a strong alignment with the latter perspective due to the rationales and reasons that are elucidated in this essay.
On the one hand, some reasons explain why certain people become excellent leaders spontaneously. There is an unquestionable truth that each individual has a hidden capacity separately, which makes a significant difference among people from personality to background. Therefore, some people are easily in the limelight with leadership potential, which gives them access to the position of chairperson through engaging in extracurricular activity at school without hesitation. For example, some people are more extroverted than others who have no trouble with communication and are energetic or active in teamwork groups. Additionally, one of the primary factors is the environment and the parenting style. If a child grows up in a successful family or learns at international schools, he will adopt this ability naturally.
However, I believe that there are several reasons why somebody could hone their leadership abilities. When they are at school or in public activities, teamwork-building plays a key role in connecting with each individual's spirit and perspective in this day and age. Thus, they can immerse themselves in a positive environment and be exposed to numerous professional mentors or peers. This approach is effective in helping them enhance their leadership abilities during progression and express their distinct style. Moreover, with the emergence of many soft skill courses, people can be trained and practice freely, following proficient guidance with qualified commitment.
In summary, expect to have natural leadership talent, There are many pathways for people to acquire it. But if they desire to, I think they could learn this skill effectively.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"Some say" -> "It is argued"
Explanation: "It is argued" is a more formal and precise way to introduce a statement that represents a prevailing opinion, aligning better with academic writing standards.
"becoming a well-known futuristic leader" -> "becoming a prominent future leader"
Explanation: "Futuristic" is somewhat redundant when used with "leader," as "future" already implies a forward-thinking perspective. "Prominent" is a more precise term that conveys importance and recognition without redundancy.
"people might improve their managerial skills in the long term" -> "individuals can develop their managerial skills over time"
Explanation: "Individuals" is a more formal term than "people," and "develop" is more specific than "improve," which is vague. "Over time" is a clearer and more formal expression than "in the long term."
"my personal opinion expresses a strong alignment" -> "I strongly align with my opinion"
Explanation: "I strongly align with my opinion" is a more direct and formal way to express personal agreement, avoiding the awkward construction of "my personal opinion expresses a strong alignment."
"rationales and reasons" -> "arguments and reasons"
Explanation: "Arguments" is more specific and academically appropriate than "rationales," which can be vague and overly broad in this context.
"some reasons explain why certain people become excellent leaders spontaneously" -> "certain factors contribute to individuals becoming natural leaders"
Explanation: "Certain factors contribute to individuals becoming natural leaders" is more precise and avoids the informal tone of "some reasons explain why certain people become excellent leaders spontaneously."
"hidden capacity separately" -> "inherent abilities"
Explanation: "Inherent abilities" is a more precise and formal term than "hidden capacity," which is vague and less commonly used in academic writing.
"easily in the limelight" -> "quickly gain prominence"
Explanation: "Quickly gain prominence" is a more formal and precise way to describe becoming well-known or prominent, avoiding the colloquial "easily in the limelight."
"without hesitation" -> "without delay"
Explanation: "Without delay" is a more formal expression than "without hesitation," which can imply emotional urgency that is less suitable for academic writing.
"more extroverted than others" -> "more outgoing than others"
Explanation: "Outgoing" is a more specific and academically appropriate term than "extroverted," which can be seen as overly psychological or informal in this context.
"have no trouble with communication" -> "excel in communication"
Explanation: "Excel in communication" is a more precise and formal way to describe proficiency in communication, avoiding the casual "have no trouble with."
"environment and the parenting style" -> "environment and parental influences"
Explanation: "Parental influences" is a more specific and formal term than "parenting style," which can be vague and informal.
"he will adopt this ability naturally" -> "he will naturally develop this ability"
Explanation: "Develop" is more precise than "adopt," which implies a more passive process, and "naturally" is correctly placed after "develop" for grammatical accuracy.
"somebody could hone their leadership abilities" -> "individuals can refine their leadership skills"
Explanation: "Individuals can refine their leadership skills" is more formal and precise than "somebody could hone their leadership abilities," and "refine" is a more specific verb than "hone" in this context.
"expect to have natural leadership talent" -> "anticipate possessing natural leadership talent"
Explanation: "Anticipate possessing" is a more formal and precise way to express expectation, aligning better with academic style than "expect to have."
"But if they desire to" -> "However, if they choose to"
Explanation: "However, if they choose to" is a more formal and clear way to introduce a conditional statement, replacing the informal "But if they desire to."

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both views regarding leadership, presenting arguments for both the belief that some individuals are naturally good leaders and the perspective that leadership skills can be learned. The introduction clearly outlines the two sides of the argument, and the body paragraphs provide supporting details for each viewpoint. However, the conclusion could be clearer in reiterating the discussion of both views before stating the author’s opinion.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the conclusion should explicitly summarize the key points made for both perspectives before stating the author’s opinion. This would provide a more balanced closure and reinforce the discussion.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that aligns with the belief that leadership skills can be learned. This is evident in the consistent use of phrases like "my personal opinion expresses a strong alignment with the latter perspective." However, the transition between discussing both views and the author’s opinion could be smoother, as the shift may confuse readers about the primary stance.
- How to improve: To improve clarity, the author could use transitional phrases that clearly signal when they are shifting from discussing one viewpoint to presenting their own opinion. For example, phrases like "While I acknowledge the merits of natural leadership, I firmly believe…" would help maintain a clear narrative thread.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents and extends ideas well, particularly in the discussion of how individuals can develop leadership skills through teamwork and mentorship. The examples provided, such as the impact of a supportive environment and the availability of soft skill courses, are relevant and effectively support the author’s argument. However, some points could benefit from further elaboration to strengthen the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance the support for ideas, the author should consider providing more specific examples or anecdotes that illustrate how individuals have successfully developed leadership skills. This could include referencing specific programs or personal experiences that demonstrate the effectiveness of learning leadership.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the discussion of natural leadership versus learned skills. However, there are moments where the language becomes slightly convoluted, which may distract from the main argument. For instance, phrases like "hidden capacity separately" are vague and could lead to confusion about the intended meaning.
- How to improve: To maintain focus and clarity, the author should aim for more straightforward language and avoid overly complex phrases. Simplifying sentences and ensuring that each point directly relates to the topic will help keep the essay on track and enhance overall readability.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the task and effectively discusses both views on leadership, improvements in clarity, elaboration, and conclusion structure could elevate the response further.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the two perspectives on leadership. Each viewpoint is discussed in separate paragraphs, which helps in maintaining clarity. The first paragraph effectively introduces the idea that some individuals are naturally inclined to be leaders, supported by examples such as personality traits and environmental influences. The second paragraph shifts to the opposing view, discussing how leadership skills can be developed through experience and education. However, the transition between these two viewpoints could be smoother, as the connection between paragraphs feels somewhat abrupt.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly link the two perspectives. For example, after discussing natural leadership abilities, a phrase like "On the other hand" could be used to introduce the contrasting view more fluidly. Additionally, summarizing the key points of each paragraph before transitioning to the next can help reinforce the logical progression of ideas.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a clear paragraph structure, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the discussion. The introduction sets the stage, while the body paragraphs delve into the two perspectives. However, the conclusion is somewhat weak and does not effectively summarize the main arguments presented in the essay. The final statement feels abrupt and lacks a strong closing that ties back to the introduction.
- How to improve: Strengthen the conclusion by summarizing the key points discussed in the body paragraphs and reiterating your opinion in a more impactful way. Consider restating the importance of both perspectives before emphasizing your stance. This will create a more cohesive end to the essay and reinforce the arguments made throughout.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable use of cohesive devices, such as "On the one hand," "Conversely," and "Moreover," which help to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. However, the range of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances where the flow could be improved with additional linking words or phrases. For example, the phrase "this approach is effective" could be better connected to the previous sentence to clarify how it relates to the discussion on honing leadership abilities.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as "In addition," "Furthermore," or "Consequently." This will enhance the fluidity of the writing and help guide the reader through your arguments more seamlessly. Additionally, ensure that each cohesive device is used appropriately to maintain clarity and coherence in your writing.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score in this criterion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with terms like "futuristic leader," "managerial skills," "extroverted," and "teamwork-building." These choices reflect an understanding of the topic and show an ability to convey complex ideas. However, some phrases are somewhat repetitive or awkwardly constructed, such as "hidden capacity separately" and "the merit that both aspects of thought offer," which could be expressed more clearly.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer could incorporate synonyms or related terms to avoid repetition. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "leadership abilities," alternatives like "leadership qualities" or "leadership traits" could be utilized. Additionally, varying sentence structures and using more idiomatic expressions could enrich the essay further.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: While the essay includes some precise vocabulary, there are instances of imprecise usage. For example, the phrase "hidden capacity separately" is unclear and could confuse readers. The expression "expect to have natural leadership talent" also lacks clarity and could be better articulated.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should aim for clarity in their expressions. For example, instead of "hidden capacity separately," a clearer phrase could be "innate abilities that vary among individuals." Additionally, revising "expect to have natural leadership talent" to "while some may possess innate leadership qualities" would enhance clarity and precision.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally demonstrates good spelling accuracy, with no glaring errors that impede understanding. However, there are minor issues, such as "chairperson" which could be more commonly referred to as "leader" in this context, and "proficient guidance with qualified commitment," which could be simplified for clarity.
- How to improve: To maintain high spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread their work carefully, focusing on commonly confused words and ensuring that all terms are used correctly in context. Utilizing spell-check tools and reading the essay aloud can help identify any overlooked spelling or usage errors.

Overall, the essay reflects a solid understanding of the topic with a commendable use of vocabulary. By focusing on clarity, precision, and variety in word choice, the writer can further enhance their lexical resource and potentially achieve a higher band score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences and a mix of simple and compound sentences. For example, phrases like "Despite the merit that both aspects of thought offer" and "However, I believe that there are several reasons why somebody could hone their leadership abilities" showcase the use of subordinate clauses effectively. However, there are instances of repetitive structures, particularly in the way ideas are introduced and developed, which can detract from the overall variety.
- How to improve: To enhance the diversity of sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more varied introductory phrases and transition words. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "On the one hand" and "However," alternatives such as "In contrast," "Conversely," or "Another perspective is that" could be employed. Additionally, varying the placement of dependent clauses can create more dynamic sentence flow, such as starting with an adverbial clause or using inversion for emphasis.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy, with only a few errors that affect clarity. For example, the phrase "there is an unquestionable truth that each individual has a hidden capacity separately" is awkwardly phrased and could be clearer. Additionally, the use of commas is inconsistent; for instance, "In summary, expect to have natural leadership talent," lacks clarity and should be rephrased for grammatical correctness. The sentence structure in "But if they desire to, I think they could learn this skill effectively" is somewhat informal for an academic essay.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on clarity and conciseness. Revising awkward phrases for clearer expression will enhance readability. For punctuation, ensuring that commas are used correctly to separate clauses and items in a list will improve the overall flow of the essay. It may also be beneficial to review rules regarding conjunctions and sentence fragments to avoid informal constructions. For example, rephrasing "But if they desire to, I think they could learn this skill effectively" to "However, if individuals are motivated, they can effectively learn leadership skills" would enhance formality and clarity.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical range and accuracy, focusing on diversifying sentence structures and refining grammatical precision will help elevate the score further.

Bài sửa mẫu

Some say that becoming a well-known future leader involves having natural leadership abilities. Conversely, others believe that people can improve their managerial skills over time. Despite the merits that both aspects of thought offer, I strongly align with the latter perspective due to the arguments and reasons that are elucidated in this essay.

On the one hand, there are several reasons why certain individuals become excellent leaders naturally. There is an unquestionable truth that each person has hidden capacities that make a significant difference among individuals, from personality to background. Therefore, some people quickly gain prominence with leadership potential, which gives them access to positions of responsibility through engaging in extracurricular activities at school without delay. For example, some individuals are more outgoing than others and have no trouble with communication; they are energetic and active in teamwork groups. Additionally, one of the primary factors is the environment and parental influences. If a child grows up in a successful family or learns in international schools, he will naturally develop this ability.

However, I believe that there are several reasons why individuals can refine their leadership skills. When they are at school or involved in public activities, teamwork plays a key role in connecting with each person’s spirit and perspective in this day and age. Thus, they can immerse themselves in a positive environment and be exposed to numerous professional mentors or peers. This approach is effective in helping them enhance their leadership abilities over time and express their distinct style. Moreover, with the emergence of many soft skill courses, people can be trained and practice freely, following proficient guidance with qualified commitment.

In summary, while some may anticipate possessing natural leadership talent, there are many pathways for individuals to acquire it. However, if they choose to, I think they could learn this skill effectively.