Some people say that picture books are good for children, but others argue that while picture books are generally beneficial, there might be some downsides to consider. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is an ongoing debate whether or not children should read books with pictures. Some argue that picture books encourage children’s reading habits, while others believe that reading books contain pictures is detrimental. I personally stand on the side that illustration books are harmful for children.

On the one hand, reading books with pictures brings many advantages for young children. It inspires children to read books, increases their interest and create a foundation for literacy. Furthermore, illustrations in books can be seen as an assistance for children to comprehend the meaning of the story and learn new words through it. For example, in some handicraft books, if there are any pictures describe in each stage, it will be very hard for young children to understand how to do within constructions.

However, picture books can be viewed from a negative perspective. Picture books slow down the reading speed of children because they pay their attention to these colorful diagrams. Moreover, these types of books hinder the creativity and imaginative ability of children, relying too much on illustrations might prevent children from visualizing stories independently when reading text-heavy books.

In conclusion, reading books with imagines has both advantages and disadvantages for children’s reading habits so it is very important for parents and adults to choose the right education method.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"There is an ongoing debate" -> "There is an ongoing debate"
Explanation: The phrase "There is an ongoing debate" is grammatically correct and appropriate for academic writing, but it could be more formal by removing the redundant "an" before "ongoing."
"picture books" -> "picture books"
Explanation: The term "picture books" is correct and commonly used in academic contexts, but it could be more precise to specify "illustrated books" or "picture books for children" to clarify the context.
"reading books contain pictures" -> "reading books with illustrations"
Explanation: "Reading books contain pictures" is awkward and incorrect. "Reading books with illustrations" is more natural and precise.
"I personally stand on the side that illustration books are harmful for children." -> "I maintain that illustrated books are detrimental to children."
Explanation: "I personally stand on the side" is informal and vague. "I maintain that" is more formal and assertive, and "detrimental" is a more precise term than "harmful."
"reading books with pictures brings many advantages" -> "reading illustrated books offers numerous benefits"
Explanation: "Brings many advantages" is somewhat informal and vague. "Offers numerous benefits" is more formal and specific.
"increases their interest and create a foundation for literacy" -> "enhances their interest and establishes a foundation for literacy"
Explanation: "Increases" is correct but "enhances" is more precise in this context, and "establishes" is more formal than "create."
"illustrations in books can be seen as an assistance for children" -> "illustrations in books serve as an aid for children"
Explanation: "Can be seen as an assistance" is awkward and informal. "Serve as an aid" is direct and more formal.
"if there are any pictures describe in each stage" -> "if there are any illustrations described in each stage"
Explanation: "Pictures describe" is grammatically incorrect. "Illustrations described" corrects the verb tense and is more precise.
"it will be very hard for young children to understand how to do within constructions" -> "it may be challenging for young children to comprehend the construction process"
Explanation: "It will be very hard" is informal and imprecise. "It may be challenging" is more academically appropriate, and "comprehend the construction process" is clearer and more formal.
"Picture books slow down the reading speed of children" -> "Illustrated books may slow children’s reading pace"
Explanation: "Picture books" is less specific than "illustrated books," and "slow down the reading speed" is a bit informal. "May slow children’s reading pace" is more precise and formal.
"pay their attention to these colorful diagrams" -> "focus on these colorful illustrations"
Explanation: "Pay their attention to" is verbose and informal. "Focus on" is more concise and appropriate for academic writing.
"relying too much on illustrations might prevent children from visualizing stories independently" -> "overreliance on illustrations may hinder children’s ability to visualize stories independently"
Explanation: "Relying too much on" is informal and vague. "Overreliance on" is more precise and formal, and "hinder" is a stronger, more academic term than "prevent."
"reading books with imagines has both advantages and disadvantages" -> "reading illustrated books has both advantages and disadvantages"
Explanation: "Imagines" is incorrect and should be "illustrations" for clarity and accuracy.
"it is very important for parents and adults to choose the right education method" -> "it is crucial for parents and educators to select the appropriate educational approach"
Explanation: "Very important" is too informal and vague. "Crucial" is more precise and formal, and "educators" is more specific than "adults," and "select the appropriate educational approach" is more formal and precise than "choose the right education method."

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses both views regarding picture books, mentioning their benefits and drawbacks. However, it lacks depth in discussing the second perspective, which could lead to a more balanced view. The statement "I personally stand on the side that illustration books are harmful for children" suggests a personal opinion but does not adequately explore the reasons behind this stance or how it relates to the overall discussion.
- How to improve: To improve, the essay should ensure that both sides are equally represented. This can be achieved by providing more detailed examples and explanations for both the advantages and disadvantages of picture books. Additionally, explicitly stating the conclusion or opinion in a more nuanced way would enhance the response.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The writer’s position is stated in the introduction and reiterated in the conclusion. However, the argument is not consistently supported throughout the essay. For instance, while the benefits of picture books are acknowledged, the negative aspects are presented more forcefully, which may confuse the reader regarding the writer’s true stance.
- How to improve: To maintain a clear position, the writer should consistently link back to their opinion throughout the essay. This can be done by framing each point made about the advantages or disadvantages in relation to the overall argument. Additionally, a more explicit statement of the opinion in the conclusion would help reinforce the position taken.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents some ideas regarding the advantages and disadvantages of picture books, but these ideas are not fully developed. For example, the mention of how illustrations assist comprehension is a good start, but it lacks further elaboration or examples that could strengthen this point. Similarly, the argument about creativity is introduced but not sufficiently supported with examples or reasoning.
- How to improve: To enhance the presentation and support of ideas, the writer should aim to elaborate on each point made. This could involve providing specific examples or research findings that illustrate the benefits or drawbacks of picture books. Additionally, using a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary could make the argument more engaging and persuasive.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, discussing picture books and their impact on children. However, the phrase "reading books contain pictures is detrimental" is vague and could be more specific about what aspects are detrimental. Additionally, the conclusion introduces the idea of choosing the right educational method, which, while relevant, feels somewhat disconnected from the main discussion about picture books.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that all points made directly relate to the discussion of picture books. It would be beneficial to avoid introducing new concepts in the conclusion that have not been discussed in the body of the essay. Instead, the conclusion should summarize the main points and restate the opinion clearly.

Overall, the essay demonstrates an understanding of the task but requires more depth, clarity, and coherence to achieve a higher band score. Focusing on these areas will significantly enhance the effectiveness of the response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the debate regarding picture books. The body paragraphs are divided into two distinct viewpoints: the advantages of picture books and the disadvantages. This logical organization helps the reader follow the argument. However, the transition between the two perspectives could be smoother. For example, the shift from the advantages to the disadvantages feels abrupt, which may confuse readers about the overall flow of the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases or sentences that explicitly connect the two viewpoints. For instance, after discussing the advantages, a sentence like "Despite these benefits, there are significant concerns regarding the impact of picture books on children’s reading development" could provide a clearer transition to the counterargument.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with one paragraph dedicated to the advantages and another to the disadvantages of picture books. Each paragraph contains relevant information that supports its main idea. However, the concluding paragraph lacks a strong summary of the points made and does not clearly restate the writer’s opinion in a compelling way.
- How to improve: Strengthen the conclusion by summarizing the key points from both body paragraphs and clearly restating your opinion. For example, you could say, "While picture books can foster initial interest in reading, the potential drawbacks, such as reduced reading speed and creativity, suggest that they should be used judiciously in a child’s reading repertoire."
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "on the one hand" and "however," which help to contrast the two viewpoints. However, the range of cohesive devices used is somewhat limited, and there are instances where the connections between ideas could be more explicit. For example, the phrase "these types of books hinder the creativity" could be better linked to the previous sentence to clarify the relationship between the ideas.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider range of linking phrases and words. For instance, use "in addition," "furthermore," or "conversely" to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. Additionally, consider using pronouns or synonyms to refer back to previously mentioned concepts, which can help maintain coherence throughout the essay.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a balanced view. By improving transitions, enhancing paragraph structure, and diversifying cohesive devices, the coherence and cohesion of the essay can be further strengthened, potentially leading to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, particularly in discussing the advantages and disadvantages of picture books. Phrases like "reading habits," "foundation for literacy," and "creativity and imaginative ability" show an attempt to use varied vocabulary. However, the essay also relies on some repetitive phrases, such as "reading books with pictures" and "picture books," which could be varied further to enhance lexical diversity.
- How to improve: To improve, the writer could incorporate synonyms or related terms to avoid repetition. For example, instead of repeatedly saying "picture books," alternatives like "illustrated books," "visual storybooks," or "graphic literature" could be used. Additionally, using more descriptive adjectives or adverbs could enrich the vocabulary further.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains instances of imprecise vocabulary usage. For example, the phrase "reading books contain pictures" should be "books that contain pictures." The term "illustration books" is also somewhat awkward; "illustrated books" would be more appropriate. Additionally, the phrase "hard for young children to understand how to do within constructions" is unclear and could confuse readers.
- How to improve: To enhance precision, the writer should focus on proper collocations and grammatical structures. Revising phrases for clarity and correctness will help. For instance, instead of "hard for young children to understand how to do within constructions," a clearer version could be "difficult for young children to grasp the steps involved in construction without visual aids."
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a fair level of spelling accuracy, with only a few minor errors. However, the word "imagines" in the conclusion is incorrect and should be "images." Additionally, the phrase "handicraft books" could be more accurately referred to as "craft books" or "DIY books," which may also improve clarity.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread their work carefully, perhaps reading it aloud to catch errors. Utilizing spell-check tools and maintaining a personal list of commonly misspelled words can also be beneficial. Regular practice with vocabulary quizzes or spelling exercises can help reinforce correct spelling.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents both sides of the argument, enhancing vocabulary range, precision, and spelling accuracy will contribute to a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, the use of "Some argue that picture books encourage children’s reading habits, while others believe that reading books contain pictures is detrimental" effectively contrasts two viewpoints. However, there are instances where sentence structures could be more varied. For example, the phrase "reading books with pictures brings many advantages for young children" could be rephrased to enhance complexity, such as "One of the significant advantages of reading books with pictures for young children is that it fosters their reading habits."
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, consider incorporating more complex sentences that include subordinate clauses or relative clauses. For example, instead of saying "Moreover, these types of books hinder the creativity," you could say "Moreover, the reliance on these types of books can hinder children’s creativity, as they may become accustomed to relying on visual aids rather than engaging their imagination."
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy, but there are notable errors that affect clarity. For instance, the phrase "reading books contain pictures is detrimental" should be corrected to "reading books that contain pictures is detrimental." Additionally, the sentence "if there are any pictures describe in each stage" contains a grammatical error; it should be "if there are any pictures describing each stage." Punctuation is mostly correct, but the use of commas could be improved for better readability, such as adding a comma before "and create a foundation for literacy" in the first body paragraph.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of relative clauses. Additionally, reviewing punctuation rules, particularly regarding the use of commas in compound sentences, will improve clarity. For example, revising sentences to ensure they are complete and correctly punctuated will help convey ideas more effectively. Consider practicing with grammar exercises that focus on common errors identified in the essay, such as verb forms and sentence structure.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of grammatical range and accuracy, addressing the identified weaknesses will help in achieving a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

There is an ongoing debate about whether or not children should read books with pictures. Some argue that picture books encourage children’s reading habits, while others believe that reading books with illustrations is detrimental. I personally maintain that illustrated books are harmful to children.

On the one hand, reading books with pictures offers many advantages for young children. It inspires children to read, enhances their interest, and establishes a foundation for literacy. Furthermore, illustrations in books serve as an aid for children to comprehend the meaning of the story and learn new words through them. For example, in some craft books, if there are any illustrations described in each stage, it may be very hard for young children to understand how to proceed with the constructions.

However, picture books can also be viewed from a negative perspective. Illustrated books may slow down children’s reading pace because they focus on these colorful illustrations. Moreover, these types of books hinder the creativity and imaginative ability of children; overreliance on illustrations may prevent them from visualizing stories independently when reading text-heavy books.

In conclusion, reading books with illustrations has both advantages and disadvantages for children’s reading habits, so it is crucial for parents and educators to select the appropriate educational approach.